Bang Town

Babeland wants to you to get more from your orgasm. I love it already.

In the new book Moregasm: Babeland’s Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex, you are sure to learn how to get more out of coming … with or without a partner. And that is a good thing.

The book will be released on Jan. 5 and it is a lot different from other sex guide books.

How?

Well, it gives details on you can enjoy all aspects of sex from masturbation to anal sex. And it’s not a boring how-to guide; authors Claire Cavanah and Rachel Venning, the ladies who started Babeland, use humor and everyday questions to get their points across. And these women know what they are talking about. My favorite lesson learned in the book was about preparing yourself for anal sex. (If you’ve been reading this blog for more than a week, you know how we at The Bangtown feel about anal sex!)

If pondering anal sex with a partner, consider trying it alone first. You can address your fears, find your boundaries, get comfortable with the sensations.

I’ve never read about anal masturbation before and the tips that follow make the book worth the cover price.

No matter what kind of sex you want to have, this book has you covered. With the tips listed in this book, you are sure to blow your mind — either alone with your magic wand or your mate.

Just because the ghost and goblin costumes have to be put away, it doesn’t mean that you can’t wear a costume to spice up any night of the year.

Stores like The Red Door and Adam and Eve have sexy costumes all year round.

Want to be a naughty nurse?

You don’t have to wait until Halloween to do that.

So, why should you keep your costuming going all year round? It spices things up when you surprise your mate in something other than black lace or boy shorts.

If you’re going to dress up, then don’t forget the wigs. You can get a wig from a beauty supply store and be the blond that your mate wants to bang. Or that sexy red head he’s been dreaming of.

Why not save the day as a sexy super hero? Now that Halloween is over, that Wonder Woman costume is probably on sale. And dressing like the famous amazon gives you a reason to tie your mate up with your “lasso of truth.”

If you’re not interested in being a hero, because what’s the fun in being a good girl, then be bad ass Catwoman.

Now you can pull out that whip you’ve been hiding underneath your bed. Just keep in mind, bad girls get punished too.

So, you don’t have to wait until Halloween to pull out a costume. You can be sexy and sassy all year round.

You’ve gone to the bathroom at your favorite nightclub or seedy restaurant and there it is on the wall, a condom machine.

Inside there are glow in the dark condoms, strawberry flavored ones and the tickler.

Curious, you buy one and decided to try it. Or not.

The Frisky isn’t happy with some novelty condoms.

From the beer stein to the banana, the cow to the devil, the elephant to the zebra, these johnson raincoats are not something most women want anywhere near their hoo-has. One supposes it would be amusing to see a guy tromping around in nothing but the gas mask jimmy, but, for God’s sake, don’t try to do anything with a willy if it’s wearing one of these, ladies.

But safe sex is anything but sexy, sometimes. Why not have fun with condoms? You’re being safe and you’re adding a little spice to you bedroom action. Still, a gas mask covered penis does seem to be a bit much.

And for the record, the tickler condom never seems to work.

If you’ve been with your mate for a while, your sex life probably needs a makeover.

This article from YourTango.com is the first step.

Sexual experimentation is key for keeping a long-term relationship fresh, fun and fulfilling. Opening up about your desires can also bring you and your partner closer together. “Experimenting with each other requires a willingness to be vulnerable, which improves intimacy,” says Mort Fertel, Baltimore marriage counselor and creator of the Marriage Fitness Program.

The best type of sex on the list is the “hope we don’t get caught” sex. You remember being young and sneaking into the basement of your parents’ house to get a piece from your boyfriend or girlfriend. While you were stroking, you were also listening for those tale-tale footsteps that belonged to mom or dad.

That made the sex so much more exciting and risky. It’s just as fun as an adult. And if you’re dating someone with kids, you’re probably well versed in the sneaky sex act.

Oral sex without getting caught, now that is the height of excitement. Though it’s a lot easier for a woman to give oral sex to her man than the other way around.

This weekend is the best time to try it. After all, it’s supposed to be raining.

I’m always online just looking for things.

Today I came across what I thought would be a cute website, Nawtythings.

It was cute until I saw an article about vibrator instructions for women.

All you really need to know about using a vibrator is “Do What Feels Good”, “Keep it Clean” and if it is “Not Water-Proof” don’t put it in water.  Now that you have the very simple rules – a vibrator is designed to stimulate.  It does a better job of stimulating than a tongue, fingers, or any inanimate object.

If that is all you need to know, then why is this article so long? Did the writer think women are so dense we don’t know how to please ourselves–with or without a vibrator?

And why is it that women have to be taught about masturbation and men are never instructed on what they need to do to bring joy to their sticks?

Here’s a news flash, women know how to make themselves feel good down there without detailed instructions.

The cyber beef between The Frisky and Cosmo is funny and oh so wrong.

Take the Frisky slap at Cosmo about celebrated sex positions that men hate. I know for a fact that I was introduced to one of these positions by a man, so I doubt that he was considered when they wrote this article.

But it goes a little something like this:

With that being said, here’s a look at some common sex positions that men don’t necessarily appreciate in the way that sex columnists tend to indicate that we do.

1. Reverse cowgirl. This particular position is endorsed ad infinitum in issues of magazines like Cosmopolitan dating back to roughly the 1400s, before sex even existed. The woman is on top and is facing away from the man. Magazines are quick to point out that this gives the guy a view of your ass.

The thing is, though, most men would rather be looking at the front of you, and this particular position greatly improves the chances of women suddenly sitting on our penises. This position is like walking a sexual tightrope. Don’t be surprised if you look back and see us praying.

2. Standing against a wall. It’s basically doggy style, only you’re both standing. This creates considerable embarrassment for the man if he’s not very tall, or even if he’s about the same height as the woman. There’s also not a lot of thrusting room. We’ll be pining for an actual bed in no time. Besides, if you’re over at our place, we really don’t want you to see how completely filthy the walls are—not filthy in a sexy way, filthy more in an “Oh God, I hope I don’t contract lockjaw” way.

3. Knees over the head. Another big Cosmo suggestion, for flexible women, is the knees-over-the-head position. Basically, the woman is in an extended crunch while the man tries to hold his balance and smells the woman’s feet. Needless to say, it’s not a great position after a long night of dancing, drinking, or both. Despite what the magazines say, the “enhanced pressure” doesn’t make any difference to dudes. It’s basically missionary position with gymnastics. Not so much sexy as confusing.

4. Sex on furniture. Generally speaking, any sexual position that incorporates furniture other than a bed can become a problem easily. Heavyset guys will traumatically remember scenes of Chris Farley bursting through a table on “Saturday Night Live,” and the thinner guys will worry about splinters or accidentally tipping over, no matter who’s on top or in front or leaning back or whatever. Furniture just seems to get in the way for guys. Though we won’t refuse sex when you’re standing on a chair or balancing on a glass table, we’ll be anxious the whole time, both about breaking you, breaking ourselves and breaking that damn IKEA furniture that we just assembled last week.

Not ready to take that pole dancing class to add some spice to your life or to get a unique workout?

Then you should try belly dancing. But if you’re not sure that you’ll keep up with it, then check it out for free.

Lotus Dance Studio offers a free intro to bellydancing class at several locations.

South Charlotte
September 22, 2009
7:30pm-8:30pm
Ballantyne Hotel and Lodge (Ballantyne Resort) – 10000 Ballantyne Commons Pkwy.

North Charlotte
September 21, 2009
7pm – 8pm
Dance Fever Charlotte – 5818 Prosperity Church Road

September 23, 2009
7pm – 8pm
Dance Productions – 5945-C Orr Road, Charlotte

Make sure to RSVP at 704-249-4379 to reserve your spot. If you sign up for classes you’ll receive a discount.

The whole pole dancing for exercise craze doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.

So, I put in a call to Pole Dance Charlotte to see what makes pole dancing for regular women so exciting.

Some women take it too far, though. When I was on the subway in New York, a group of drunk girls got on and started twirling in the poles in the middle of the train. It was all fun and games until one chick fell. (And yes, me and my companions laughed our asses off.)

Pole Dance Charlotte owner Kelly Adams said pole dancing is a sexy work out that gives women a chance to release their “inner sex kitten.” But, she said, she’s not turning out the next generation of strippers from her studio.

And while Adams has a dancing background, she’s never taken it off on stage. But she knows the benefits of pole dancing. At 41, Adams is in amazing shape and says that often times when she’s out with her 17 year old daughter, people comment on how much they look alike.

When you walk into The Pole Dance Charlotte studios, it has more of a ballet school feel than Stripper U.

“Women want to act sexy and they want to be that dancer that’s on the stage at the strip club but they don’t want to take their clothes off for money in front of a stranger,” Adams said.

And it’s not easy to do the things you see dancers at gentlemen’s clubs do either.

“When they come in, they realize that it’s not as easy as it looks,” Adams said about pole dancing. “They try a 30 minute class and they say, ‘Not only was it fun, but I am sweating, my body is sore and I feel like I’ve had a regular workout.’”

Adams said because pole dancing as exercise is still new, a lot of her clients are curious to find out what it’s all about. “Parties that come in are blown away because they’re coming in to have a fun good time and they end up having the work out that they’re not expecting,” she said.

But let’s be real, when you think pole dancing, you do think sex. Adams said that many of her clients pick up moves and the confidence to go home to their mates and add some spice to their love life. But she said it has less to do with the pole and more to do with the fact that after a few sessions, women see a change in their bodies.

And despite the fact that Pole Dance Charlotte is just about working out and having fun, (Adams said she has clients that range from age 18-75 and professional women to house wives) there has been controversy.

If you’re looking for a sign to lead you to Pole Dance Charlotte in it’s south Charlotte location. You’re out of luck.

The landlord where Adams rents her space from wouldn’t allow her to put up the Pole Dance Charlotte name or logo. Instead, she said, she had to put up a PDC sign.

Instead of this one.

“One day people will put the stereotype of pole dancing aside and take a look at its benefits to women,” Adams said.

Lingerie shop Priscilla’s must have gotten married because the South Boulevard location is now Priscilla McCall’s.

Having a woman’s name on a lingerie store that also sells whips and chains makes people feel more at ease going inside. This shop is well lit and looks more like a chic fashion boutique than some of the places on Wilkinson Boulevard.

The Red Door is another store that has it right. When a sex shop doesn’t feel seedy, you don’t attract seedy people. I’m ready for Charlotte to bring sex out of the back alleys and neighborhood that are in need of urban renewal.

A little hair pulling and nibbling in the right place is just what a lot of women need to get going in the bed. But if you want to push her over the edge, say something nasty.

A well placed pussy, fuck me and some other choice words will do nothing but make the sex hotter.

Now, this can also backfire. I have a male friend who said he hates to hear a woman say pussy, as in “fuck this pussy.”

Says it turns him off like a light switch. So, talking dirty has to come with time. Imagine having sex with someone for the first time and they talk like porn star Eva Angelina. Is that really going to turn you on right away? Better yet, are you going to want anything more than sex from this person?

And there are just some things you don’t want to hear in bed. I think The Frisky did a good job of identifying 36 words that should never be uttered during sex.

In my opinion, “just like in jail,” should’ve been number one.