Crib Notes

This weekend Chunklet Magazine proprietor Henry Owings made no bones about his feelings regarding the floundering, Decatur-based Paste magazine.

On Friday Owings challenged Paste to a high school-style public debate regarding the merits of Paste and Chunklet, thus revisiting the “Bucket of Shit” topic from the latest Chunklet.

So there’s a benefit show tonight for the worst magazine falling on hard financial times in 2009, Paste Magazine. I know, I know. In 2009, we should be celebrating anybody that’s willing to put out a piece of printed material. I mean, look who you’re talking to, fer chrissakes!

But no, I can’t lock step with people that endorse shit. I’ve fought in the punk rock trenches too long to let this sleeping dog (or rather dying and/or decaying dog) lie. Fuck. That.

Two years ago, back when their coffers were flush with money from Fat Possum and Luaka Bop ads, we shot across their bow. And sure, we live mere miles from their headquarters. I don’t care. And sure, their boat is sinking, but I’m firing across their bow again. Fuck it. This bitch has got to sink.

And let me say right now that if you’ve ever been a follower of Paste Magazine (other than for research purposes or morbidly curious reasons) and also read Chunklet, I don’t want you as a supporter of our endeavors. If you’ve never read Paste, you’re a lucky person and/or somebody that’s never been stuck at the Memphis Airport. Either way, you win.

Furthermore, I’m not hiding behind a computer when I write this. I am making an open challenge to anybody from Paste Magazine to a debate about their merit versus the merit of Chunklet. It’d be the ultimate spectacle. Editorial morons versus a Moron editor. The fight of the century. We’ll charge at the door and kick the money towards the winner. I’ve already picked out the curtains I’d like to buy with the winnings! Ooooh! Am I picking a fight? Well, sure, I guess I am.

No response from Paste yet, but we will keep you posted. Click below to see Chunklet’s revised list of the differences between a bucket of shit and Paste.

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The Les Savy Fav show at the Earl is sold out, but not all is lost. The day after they play the Earl, Tim Harrington and Co. are heading to Roswell to play a Chunklet Magazine sponsored Whirly Ball show. Doors open at 7 p.m. and the show starts at 8 p.m. Admission is $20 (advance) / $25 (day of show), but that also gets you a game of Whirly Ball, which is a pretty sweet deal. FYI: A typical Whirly Ball game costs $190 per court and can take up to 10 players (5 per team).

For those who are unfamiliar, Whirly Ball is a team sport that merges basketball, hockey and Jai-Alai with bumper cars. Throw Les Savy Fav into the mix and it truly will be, as their website so boldly claims, “the hottest party in town.”

The Liverhearts are opening the show, and this was intentionally booked early in the evening so as not to hamper anyone’s plans to go see Paul Collins and Gentleman Jesse at the Earl later that night.

There will also be a “special,” limited edition (only 50 available!) version of Les Savy Fav’s new LP, Let’s Stay Friends that will only be available at this show. So you kind of have to go.

(Photo courtesy of FrenchKiss Records).

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Today, Sat., Nov. 22nd, the infamous A-hole Santa returns to Criminal Records for the annual holiday sob fest. Santa, along with his trusty elves, Dookie and Crappy, will be available for photos and abuse from noon to 6 p.m., or until the crankiness becomes too unbearable — whichever comes first. After all the tears and beer have been mopped up, the Eagles of Death Metal will take the stage to spread a little holiday cheer as well.

Photographs with A-hole Santa are free, but don’t be fooled by Santa’s tough exterior, he’s a softie deep down inside. A-hole Santa will be collecting donations for PAWS Atlanta, as he does every year.

The Eagles of Death Metal will be performing live on Criminal’s stage at 6 p.m. before they head over to Center Stage to play later on this evening.

The role of A-hole Santa is played by local bon vivant, Henry Owings, of Chunklet magazine fame. The elves Dookie and Crappy play themselves.

The new and improved Criminal Records is located at 1154-A Euclid Avenue, in the Little 5 Points.

(Photo courtesy of Criminal Records)

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After three years in the making Chunklet Magazine # 20 dropped this week.

Chunklet’s 20^th issue arrives on the the magazine’s 15^th anniversary, and features interviews with comedians Paul F. Tompkins and Zach Galifianakis, as well as stories on music journalists, drug appreciation and Whirlyball with Arcade Fire, the Shins, Queens of the Stone Age, Black Lips, Deerhunter, Mogwai and more.

If you order the magazine through Chunklet.com it comes with a free split 7-inch that features Zach Galifianakis and Ted Leo and the Pharmacists.

For his side of the record Galifianakis joined up with comedian AD Miles, producer Jon Brion and Fiona Apple to record a song, titled “Up In Them Guts.” The b-side features a Ted Leo song titled “Rock’n'Roll Dreams’ll Come Through.” The first 500 copies come as a picture disc 7-inch.

To celebrate 15 years of “chafing America’s ass,” Chunklet will host a two-day blow out on Sat., Oct. 11 and Sun., Oct. 12^th at the 40 Watt in Athens. The show on the 11^th features performances from Deerhunter, Twin Tigers, Gentleman Jesse & His Men, and comedian Brent Weinbach. The show on the 12^th features performances by of Mastodon, It’s Casual and comedian Brian Posehn.

The show on the 11^th starts at 9 p.m. Tickets are $8 in advance / $10 Day of Show. The show on the 12^th starts at 9 p.m. Tickets are $20 in advance / $22 Day of Show. Or you can $15 advance tickets at School Kids Records.

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Chunklet Magazine has released its second book, titled The Rock Bible, which is being hailed as “an insider’s guide to living the rock ‘n’ roll dream… full of dos and don’ts for musicians, wannabe musicians, and rock fans of all ages.”

The book can be purchased directly from Quirk Books for 30% if you enter the code “CHUNKET”at Quirk’s website.

Here’s what The Rock Bible has to say about

Singers:  “When you feel like stage-diving, make sure the people in the front row like your music enough to catch you.”

Backstage antics:  “Couches at rock clubs have never been cleaned. Think of the crazy things that have been done on these couches, and then proceed at great personal risk.”

Lifestyle:  “If you want to die while in a famous rock band, there are four options. 1. Suicide. 2. Car or plane crash. 3. Drug overdose. 4. Murdered by a crazy relative. Just pick one and stick with it.”

…and the book comes complete with faux-Biblical illustrations, parables and essays penned by comedian Patton Oswalt, drummer Brian Teasley, and professional smartass Andrew Earles, The Rock Bible is a rude and raunchy look at the best and worst of rock ’n’ roll.

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Chunklet Magazine is distributing the debut single by Harvey Milk frontman Creston Spiers. The two songs on the 7-inch, “Yesterday’s Parade” b/w “The Time Has Come” were recorded and released by Athens’ indie label Southern Shelter. This is the second, gold vinyl pressing of the single, which originally appeared in a pressing of 200 copies on clear vinyl.

The repress is limited to only 300 copies and it won’t be sold at retail stores, but it is available from Chunklet.

“Yesterday’s Parade” was written for Spiers’ nebulous band A, which never made a proper release of its music. On the flipside, “The Time Has Come” was written while he was playing drums for fellow Athens band, Producto.

Both songs on the single are a far cry from the crushing and elegant minimalism of Harvey Milk; and both feature Spiers playing an acoustic 12-string guitar, showcasing an entirely different side of his songwriting that is vaguely reminiscent of songwriters, like Simon Joyner, Will Oldham and so on. But Spiers occupies a much more haunted Southern terrain. Get this record.

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Saturday night, Diplo returns to Atlanta to headline one of the craziest mashups of sounds to grace the WhirlyBall court. Diplo’s penchant for infusing an ’80s pop glow with electro beats, crunk hip-hop and a dose of Miami bass is an unlikely but smooth and complimentary counterpart to Dark Meat’s primitive and improvised rock jams. Noot ‘d Noot opens.

For those who are unfamiliar, WhirlyBall is a team sport that merges basketball, hockey and Jai-Alai with bumper cars.

Tickets to the show come attached to the sleeve of a 7-inch record that can only be purchased in advance at Criminal Records in L5P.

On the a-side, Athens’ Dark Meat covers the classic Iggy Pop song, “Success. ” On the flipside, in true Diplo fashion, the song is deconstructed, chopped, screwed and molded into something entirely new, that’s dubbed “Unsuccessful Space Jam.”

Tickets/records to the show come attached to the sleeve of a 7-inch record, released by Chunklet, that can be purchased at Criminal Records. They are $10 in advance ($12 day of show). The games begin at 8 p.m. WhirlyBall Atlanta is located at 608 Holcomb Bridge Road, in historic Roswell, GA.

For more information call 770-998-6161 or click on www.whirlyballatlanta.com

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