Katy Perry is NOT naked in this post
July 8, 2009 at 7:45 pm by Rabid Nick Refer
She’s not, seriously. However, the pop princess DID sit down with Cosmopolitan, the magazine that knows more orgasm secrets than professional sex workers, for a fun little interview and photo shoot. And, as you may have already guessed, The Rabid One would love to wear Ms. Perry’s cherry chapstick.
Here are some lovely excerpts from the piece:
==Katy gives hope to young boys, experimental lesbians, and Tampa’s favorite Sex and Love contributor by openly saying she is looking for love.
“I want someone to tell the details to–that I had dinner with Paul McCartney or that I met Madonna. I’m on this extraordinary adventure, and if I have no one to talk to at the end of the night, I feel lonely.”
==Everyone’s favorite cretin, Perry pal Perez Hilton suggests the starlet should invest in sex toys and write off men, “but she won’t listen.” Good girl, Perez Hilton is a HOOZE BAG.
==She’d like to married in the next five years. I’d like to throw my hat into her uh….ring. Ahem.
==The last time Katy cried was “a few nights ago,” as the boy she “couldn’t wait to see, stood her up.” Excuse me, I’m sorry. Double You Tee Eff?
==And finally, Ms. Hot and Cold’s most embarrassing moment was being talked into going to a party naked. “Never doing that again!”
==So in conclusion, Katy Perry needs a sweet boy who’ll listen, to avoid Perez Hilton like he’s a Ray’s game (yeah I went there), to not be stood up, and a place she won’t be embarrassed to party naked at. I bet she’ll love Tampa Bay. I’ll have my agent talk to her agent. I need an agent. And cherry chapstick. And a prayer.
The August 2009 issue of Cosmopolitan is on newsstands now:
You can follow Rabid Nick on Twitter and find him here every Tuesday and Thursday
in the Sex and Love section of Creative Loafing.
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