Daily Loaf

Every day at work a horny old Frenchman points out my tongue ring and asks if he can “feel the metal.”

Usually I tell him that I’d rather tattoo my vagina. OUCH! But Rebecca’s post, “Body modification can improve sex,” got me thinking; tattooing my vagina is way more appealing than blowing an old smelly Frenchman. I did some research on genital tattooing and found a few amazing specimens for your entertainment. (pictures below NSFW)

Our first female has a bird’s nest for a bush.  The tattoo is actually above her vagina, but the branches look as if they’re coming out of the nest. She must really be attached to her pubic hair.  Whether she’s a hippie or just not progressive enough to shave, at least she’s making good use of her fur.

Our second female is slightly more daring than the first.  She has elected to replace her pubic hair with a butterfly tattoo.  This looks very girlie. If she really had some balls she’d have put it lower and used her lips for the wings.  That’s what I’d do.  The butterfly would be spreading it’s wings to fly, every time I spread my legs.  Sounds sexy.

Our third female, has a sense of humor and a high pain tolerance.  This tattoo is of a Gremlin.  Yep, just like the 80’s movie.  I hope this isn’t Phoebe Cates! Bad case of nostalgia on her 40th birthday!!! The piercings are perfect teeth.  But how can someone go down on this woman if they’re afraid of being eaten themselves?

I’ve saved the best female tattoo for last. Her pussy is SATAN! If I were a shrink, I could write a book on this chick alone.  The whole idea of original sin being sex brought on by Eve.  If a man goes down there, he has to look the devil in the eyes, or he has to be man enough to “fuck” the devil.  Many men have lost their souls and minds over vaginas.  Now they just have a picture to put with it.  This pussy makes me glad I go for dick

This brings me to the one and only male example of genital tattooing.  This one is the most visibly creative cock tattoo I found:  The Dragon Slayer.  My Ex used to call his dick his Vagina Slayer but he didn’t have a tattoo.  I wonder how our relationship would have been different if he had?

Are all these really tattoo’s? I don’t know, I don’t care.  They look pretty fucking cool so I thought I’d share.

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