Daily Loaf

The other night,  my friend Daniel, a delightfully cynical Irish fellow, asked me twenty questions about my vibrator: How long had I had one? Where did I keep it? What does it look like?

The longer this went, on the more curious I got. Why the sudden fascination? He had obviously seen one before. Most women don’t bother hiding them anywhere OTHER than the night stand or underwear drawer. His questions weren’t so much about vibrators, but how a woman would react to finding a similar toy, a fake vagina, in a male companion’s night stand.

Sure, men are aware that most women have a “little helper”…. but what about men? My friend Daniel said he’s rarely had a one night stand where a vibrator has not made a guest appearance. He was never disturbed by this, but he wondered, if a man brought out a toy for himself during a one-night-stand, what would WE do?

I immediately admitted to being a total hypocrite. If I found a fake vagina in my potential lovah’s underwear drawer I would run out of there without my pants if I had to.

When I tried explaining this to Daniel, I referred to a vibrator’s ability to VIBRATE and the sad fact that penises, no matter how joyous it would be if they could, can not vibrate.

He was then quick to mention dildos. I was stumped. I myself don’t own a dildo because I fail to see the point when a vibrator takes no more than 5 minutes on a bad day. But alas, I know many women who opt for them… So if dildos are an acceptable thing to find amid a woman’s knickers, shouldn’t we women be accepting of the potential toys our male counterparts might have?

How far would this acceptance go? Would a “Real Doll” found in a closet no longer be cause for concern? Should we limit our acceptance to replica genitalia only? Are anuses off limits? Do any of you boys out there actually own a fake vagina? If so, what the hell do you tell the ladies when they discover these toys?! A little help.

Posted in Sex and Love | Leave a comment