Daily Loaf

In this over-medicated age, drug companies continue expanding their empires into the farthest realms of human behavior, developing chemical cocktails for whatever ails us: if depressed take Prozac, if scatterbrained take Adderall, if sleepless take Ambien, if impotent take Viagra… Now researchers are searching for drugs that will help you stay in love.

Consider how people often attribute their inability to remain in a relationship to psychological reasons, saying such things as, “I’m not happy anymore,” or “the spark is gone.” In a sense, a lack of love is simply a chemical imbalance, which theoretically can be corrected. Someday soon drug companies may develop a prescription pill that helps you stay in love the same way Rogaine sustains hair. Read the rest of this entry »

Social networking sites like Facebook have changed the face of modern dating, but this new technology isn’t without its flaws. We’ve all had a “friend” who has been caught flirting or cheating via illicit Facebook messages. One woman even discovered her marriage was over when her spouse spontaneously changed his relationship status to single. Below are a few awesomely hilarious examples of the various ways Facebook can f-up your dating life.

(pics originally posted on collegehumor.com) Read the rest of this entry »

Homosexuality has long been difficult to explain in terms of natural selection, as homosexuals reproduce at a lower frequency than their heterosexual counterparts. This would seemingly doom genes related to homosexuality to extinction. However, the fact that homosexuality exists in such a large variety of species suggests that it in some way offers an evolutionary advantage. Otherwise, genes that code for homosexuality would die off (off course this presupposes that you believe homosexuality is determined by nature as opposed to nurture). While homosexuality may not be entirely hereditary, evidence strongly suggests it is largely determined by genetics. Proof of this is the high rate of homosexuality in identical twins, at least for males. Read the rest of this entry »

A recent article, “How Men Select Women,” sums up the science of what men look for in female mates. I’ve synthesized the information down to a blog-sized bite. Please note that these finding are based on averages, and that a wide variety exists on each side of every claim. Averages simply give us a language for talking about attraction. If you find you don’t match all of these criteria, which is pretty much everyone, rest assured there are many people who will have a thing for your differences.

High reproductive value: Men are attracted to younger women who have more fertile years ahead of them, or a high “reproductive value.” Read the rest of this entry »

With Halloween approaching faster than an ADD kid jacked up on Snickers, much ado has been made about the sexification of female Halloween costumes. While some women feel that Halloween is the one day they can wear provocative outfits in public without being called sluts, others feel this trend increasingly objectifies women. I don’t know who’s right,  but I do know I have no problem with the sexification of male costumes. Read the rest of this entry »

Sat. Oct 24. Taboo 3. A Masquerade ball with a sexy fetish edge. World famous fetish performers, silk aerial & trapeze acts, burlesque troop, vendors, open play dungeon equipment, and naked dessert bars. Appearances by Angela Ryan, Oni & Jody, Idelsy, GoCatGo Burlesque, Aerial Eye Candy, Evelyn Rose, Victoria Sapphire and more. Music by DJ Tom Gold, DJ Sean, DJ Curse Mackey, DJ Nemesis, and DJ Rob Givens. The Castle 2004 N. 16th St. Ybor 33605.

Fri and Sat. Oct. 23 – 24. Shibari and Bondage Weekend. The Quest. 12517 66th St. N. Largo, FL 33773.

Sat. Oct 31. Fetish Factory’s Halloween Fetish Ball. Purgatory Nightclub.  1000 State Road 84 City, Fort Lauderdale, FL Zip. 33315. Read the rest of this entry »

Angela Ryan, one of many nation fetish acts performing at Taboo 3 this Saturday, describes her adventures in the world of alternative modeling.

Creative Loafing: How did you become a Fetish/pinup model and a burlesque performer?

Angela Ryan: I modeled a little professionally as a child and my mother constantly had a camera in my face. After I got through those gawky teenage years I picked it back up. When I was 20 I was asked by a friend who was a photographer to model for him. It sparked an interest in me since I was so familiar with posing as a child. I decided to pursue it further and was approached by photographers all over the country to work with them. I started doing burlesque to further my creative outlets. I ended up quitting my retail and cocktailing jobs to travel. I have been modeling and performing full time ever since. It started out as just fun but I have been lucky enough to make a career out of it! Read the rest of this entry »

Oct 8th-12th. The 17th Annual Night Moves Adult Awards. Meet your favorite adult entertainers like Jessica Drake, Kaylani Lei, Alektra Blue, Bree Olson, Kayden Kross, Alexa Jordan, Alexis Ford, Angelina Armani, Austyn Moore, Candi Lane, Chennin Blanc, Christy Wild, Deliah Strong, Derrick Pierce, Eva Angelina, Evelyn Rose, Jazella Moore, Kayden Kross, Kaylani Lei, Kylie Ireland, Lexi Lamour, Lindsey Lovehands, Lisa Sparxxx, Mariah Milano, Nikki Rhodes, Nikki Sexton, Rebecca Love, Savanna Stern, Taryn Thomas, Teagan Presley, Trina Michaels, Veronica Rayne, and Zoe Britton. Read the rest of this entry »

Paul Allen leans over his immense desk discussing the family business.  He speaks in a raspy voice not unlike Brando’s in The Godfather, though given to bursts of impromptu songs like, “I kissed a girl and I liked it.” Fingers weighted with gold rings comb his dark, slicked back hair and trimmed goatee. A large man sits in the corner with his tattooed forearms crossed. In an adjacent office, Allen’s wife Tracy finishes Paul’s sentences, filling in names and dates. Allen’s son walks in, getting his father’s approval on a project while Allen’s daughter in-laws announces new callers. Even Allen’s eighty-two year old father works in the office, balancing the books. All the doors are open, promoting an open-air intercom system. With Tampa Bay Downs blocks away, and sports memorabilia layering the walls, one might assume Allen runs a bookie operation. In fact, Allen even played a mafia kingpin in Stormy Daniels’ adult film Whack Jobs. But Allen is no gangster. He’s a business man who heads a family run publishing company, the staple of which is NightMoves—a free, monthly magazine dedicated to Tampa’s active adult scene. Read the rest of this entry »

“I feel like I’m in a horror movie,” photographer, Shannon Adams said at the VIP Dungeon Party Saturday.

Fetishists with black electrical tape X-ing out nipples, PVC suits struggling to restrain curvaceous bodies, and leashes chaining submissives to their masters’ belts, roamed The Castle’s Dungeon Room. On the padded tables, beds, and couches coated in vinyl that could be easily wiped down, exhibitionists were bound, flogged, and paddled to the electro-industrial beats of DJ Rob Givens and Purple CAT. What made the scene like a horror set wasn’t the sinister outfits, but how the partiers in blood-resistant costumes were overly friendly. Read the rest of this entry »

Stryker Vawn, the XXX fetish tag-team from Austin, Texas, will perform for an intimate crowd at the VIP Dungeon Show, Saturday Sept. 26. The leather clad Stryker and perpetually topless Vawn, took a break from whipping and prodding each other on stage to bare it all to CL.

-How would you describe a Stryker Vawn performance?

2 parts burlesque, finely chopped

1 part Vaudeville, peeled and pressed

6 parts perversion, stewed in sex butter

3 parts fantasy, drizzled with honey

1 part fury, ground coarsely

Mix contents vigorously in your mind until creamy thick.

-Do relatives know about your alter egos?

YES. When we first started, there was always a family member in the audience. They think we are weird but accept us for doing what we enjoy.

Read the rest of this entry »

Fri. Sept. 18. Crossover Night at Alt Pathway. A mix of fetish enthusiasts and swingers featuring live music by “SexWhacks.” $10. 8pm-12midnight. Alt Pathway restaurant and lounge  810 E. Skagway, Ave. Tampa.

Sat. Sept. 19. 3rd Annual Midsummer Night’s Dream. Nudity, dancing, and free food–what more could you want? $0-20. Caliente Resort Gran Via Blvd. Land O Lakes, FL 34637.

Sun. Sept. 20. Pervy Pool Party. Read the rest of this entry »

I consider myself an authority on spotting losers because, well, I used to be one. I only exempt myself now because I’m married. Not to say that all married men make quality boyfriends; I just feel that if you’re able to convince a woman to marry you after five years of dating, either you’re not a loser or you’re extraordinary at hiding it.

Obviously there are as many ways to tell if a potential man-date is a loser as there are breeds of crotch ponies. To complicate things, everyone has their own definition of what constitutes a loser. For instance, you may be perfectly fine dating a man I consider a loser because you’re desperate or you’re willing to overlook his lacking qualities in lieu of, say, his bank account. With that said, below is a list of signs the guy you just met is a loser

-When asked what he does, he says, “I’m in a band,” or “I’m an artist.” Read the rest of this entry »

Dr. Pek Van Andel had a common idea: to film sex. However, because Andel is a scientist and not an amateur porn director, he had to mask his desire in a scientific project that would garner public funding. Thus was born the scandalous video, “Magnetic Resonance Imaging of Male and Female Genitals During Coitus and Female Sexual Arousal.”

While you won’t find this title at your local adult video story, it’s on Youtube. Why, you may ask, is a video of intercourse available on Youtube, and CL for that matter? Aside from the fact that this video is less sexual than an emaciated celebutant in a blurry sex tape, what is portrayed in the video in no way resembles the common image of sex. After watching what looked like two beating hearts pounding together, I had serious doubts about if what I was doing in my marital bed even constituted sex. Read the rest of this entry »

Online surveys are all the rage. CL is even busy running our own for Best of the Bay. Particularly with sex surveys, you can’t help but wonder how accurate the findings are. For the most part, the sample group is composed of the same people who sign up for enter-to-win-contests on pop-up ads or who repost annoying Facebook surveys that describe what A-Team member or Golden Girl you would be.  Still, sex surveys are interesting because they reassure us that we’re not alone in our deviant addictions.

After reviewing several online sex surveys, I’ve included the results of two below. The first is shocking because of how tame it is. The other will make your sex life seem about as adventurous as that of an Amish widow. Read the rest of this entry »

HBO is considering giving the Hollywood treatment to Dan Savage’s syndicated sex advice column, “Savage Love.” Savage broke the news on his blog for Seattle’s, alternative weekly, The Stranger. He has been in LA for the month, lounging around his own office in HBO, working on a “non-airing” pilot called, what else, “Savage Love.” According to the unreleased press release, the (potential) show, “will focus on current events and cultural trends with sex as the filter.”

Savage gave his own brand of a press release: Read the rest of this entry »

In Fearsome Creatures of Florida, Tampa author John Henry Fleming serves as taxonomist of Florida folklore, producing a wildlife handbook that could have been published by National Enquirer. This book breathes new life into real creatures and popular myths like the Skunk Ape and the Chupacabra. However, the beasts that stay with readers long after finishing the book are Fleming’s creations, like the ghost of the monkeynaut, Gordo, trouncing along the Space Coast in his shiny suit.

From David Hazouri’s sketched illustrations, I expected a Disney World version of swamp monsters. Instead I was confronted by Swiftian creatures that prey on the book’s true monsters: humans. These unnamed locals and tourists are lazy drunks more concerned with stocking their liquor cabinets than evacuating from a hurricane. Read the rest of this entry »

Stormy Daniels may be considering a 2010 run for the U.S. Senate in her home state of Louisiana, and she may do most of her adult work on the west coast, but she parties, is a favorite guest of Bubba the Love Sponge, and gets arrested for domestic abuse right here in Tampa. Read the rest of this entry »

I love children, so long as they’re not screaming at a restaurant, shoving food on the floor, puking Gerber on my shoulder, interrupting my sleep, filling their diapers with green shit, or spoiling my social plans with emergency hospital visits. Maybe I only love other peoples’ kids, particularly my brother’s son who will carry on the proud family name by being extraordinarily average.

I may have kids one day, but not so long as I’m married to a biologist who believes overpopulation is at the root of all environmental problems. Living in the continuous strip mall that is Pinellas County, it’s hard to avoid the squeeze of overpopulation encroaching on every side not unlike the legions of change-hungry meth-addicts who swarm the moment I step outside. Who hasn’t felt the urge to lessen the overpopulation problem by veering off the road to clip a beached-whale of a tourist waddling across the street followed by a soccer team of unruly chubsters? And maybe it’s just me, but why the hell does the government not offer tax breaks to couples without children instead of breeders?

A new book, No Kids: 40 Good Reasons Not to Have Children, by Corinne Maier agrees with me. Read the rest of this entry »

According to the September 2009 edition of Playboy, watching porn boosts your testosterone levels as effectively as hormone therapy drugs.

Men lose and average of 1percent of their testosterone levels every year starting at age 30, and 5 million American men suffer from low testosterone. Among the array of detrimental effects this has on your penis, low hormone levels can cause you to shrink and become depressed. Read the rest of this entry »

Tourists flock to the northern tip of Fort De Soto to catch a glimpse of the island’s wildlife. Common sightings include the Wrinkly Assed Grandmother face down on a beach blanket and the Wandering Creepo, puffing out his belly and appearing at random among the sand dunes, wearing only shoes and socks. Read the rest of this entry »

The woman is instructed to stand above the male on some sort of elevated surface, such as a couch, bed, two chairs, Mini Cooper hood, etc. With her legs spread wide, she gradually lowers her torso, so that her “yoni” is within reach of the man, who is standing on the floor just below her. Once the man is inside of her, the two lovers gyrate and pump to their hearts content.

This position commands the use of plenty of hands-on pleasure, such as stroking each others hips and tickling each others magic buttons. His mouth will be in easy reach of her breasts and she will have full control over the amount of stimulation he can offer. Read the rest of this entry »

A book review of How to Live with a Huge Penis
By Dr. Richard Jacob and Rev. Owen Thomas

In a society obsessed with size–with cars as small as soapbox racers and cell phones like matchbooks–it’s no wonder men with oversized male genitalia, or OMG, are still persecuted. But, a new book, How to Live with a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much, offers hope. It has finally given me the strength to come unzipped about my well endowed penis.

OMGs are such a taboo subject, I didn’t even realize I had one until I measured my erection with the ruler provided on the book’s inside cover. Technically I only have a “well endowed penis,” as opposed to a full blown OMG, but I may have misdiagnosed myself. (Readers are instructed to place the ruler at the base of the penis, possibly adding several inches of undercarriage. As a gentleman, I always measure from the top) Read the rest of this entry »

Aug 13-16. Fetish Con. A fetish trade show. Featured appearances by comic book artists and writer George Perez, industry speaker and legal representative Robert B. Nussbaum, the original “Michael Meyers” Tony Moran, and Tonya Kay from Season 1 of “Who Wants to be a Super Hero.” Guests of honor: Stacy Burke Spokesmodel, Paris Kennedy, Kendra James, Maxine X, Emily Addison, Rubberdoll, Jean Bardot, Jade Indica, Paige Richards, Jewell Marceau, and Anastasia Pierce. Lectures and demonstrations: how to be a successful model, the federal record keeping statue, intro to bondage photography, self-puppeteer rope bondage suspension demo, predicament bondage, the art of body plastering, the art of cupping, the first amendment and obscenity law, super heroine showdown III, creating a presence via social networks, BDSM for the disabled, pain is for pleasure not injury, beginning rope bondage suspension, rope bondage for porn, fan photo shoot, and private dungeon play space. 18+. $20-55. Fetishcon.com. Read the rest of this entry »

[About Daily Best of the Bay: Creative Loafing is posting writers' and editors' picks for Best of the Bay 2009 each day until the BOTB issue is released on Sept. 16. Vote now for your own BOTB choices in our Readers' Poll!]

Tallahassee has the Bikini Bicyclist. Treasure Island has the heroin-thin version of Hulk Hogan who struts the beach in a gold g-string. New York City has the guitar-strumming Naked Cowboy.

And Tampa has The Senator. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s human nature to wonder what other people look like naked, especially celebrities. Artist Daniel Edwards takes this impulse to the next level, sculpting lifesize statues of nude celebrities in provocative poses. His latest piece features Angelina Jolie naked while breastfeeding twins in the recommended “football hold.” Read the rest of this entry »

A new study reported by dailymail.co gives wine drinkers another reason to act superior to the rest of us cheap beer guzzlers, and also provides bartenders another selling point for pushing a bottle over a glass. Women who drink two glasses of wine daily report better sex than those who drink one or none. While they may not actually be having better sex, the two glasses of wine may help these women believe they are. Read the rest of this entry »

If something can be considered sexy, some magazine or entertainment channel has invented a sexiest list for it: sexiest body, sexiest sports star, sexiest pop star, sexiest musician… But, before today I had never seen a Sexiest Elderly list. I have to applaud Nerve.com for even proposing the idea, and why not. Sex writers constantly discuss how more and more people are having sex well into their golden years. It only makes sense that these sexually active elderly people need older celebrities to fantasize about while having sex. Read the rest of this entry »

After debating STD rates this weekend despite the fact that I had no solid evidence, I decided to research the matter. Below is a brief overview of the STD situation in the bay area. Keep in mind that while some of these rates may seem low, they are significantly higher among sexually active demographics.

According to Avert.org, in 2007 the Tampa, St. Petersburg, Clearwater area reported 11,754 AIDS/HIV cases. For every 100,000 people, 17.2 people are living with the disease, or roughly 0.017 % of the total population. Read the rest of this entry »

Why would I, a straight man, review a collection of essays about women’s sex lives, and more importantly, why would I choose to do so on my honeymoon? Either I’m a caring husband searching for insight into pleasing my new wife, or I’m a calculating bastard researching ways to maneuver through discreet affairs. Whatever the case, I started Behind the Bedroom Door, expecting a series of romantic comedy plot lines: a torrent of quirky yet troubled sexual encounters redeemed by a meaningful relationship still in its honeymoon phase. After all, who’d write an essay about their lukewarm sex life when their current partner was sure to read it (coincidentally my marital sex life is like the opening night of a Cirque Du Soleil performance). Read the rest of this entry »

If you’re a proud penis owner, you may not want to read this. A recent article by David Freeman of webmd, laid out the skinny on what happens to a penis with age. Here’s a hint: it doesn’t double in size or develop superhuman strength.

With age, most penises, and their owners, suffer from a decline in testosterone. This means more stimuli is required for arousal, it takes longer to get an erection, it’s harder to reach climax, and it takes more time to become aroused after sex. These effects are compounded by a loss of sensitivity, which transforms the member from the emotional and easily excited penis you once adored, to an unfeeling, useless lump. Read the rest of this entry »

I admit I’ve dabbled in the art of witty tweets and Facebook status updates in hopes of catching the attention of women I don’t know well enough to message. Unfortunately, my updates usually only attract the attention of guys I went to high school with and distant relatives. Serves me right I suppose.

Now I just post updates about where I’ll be and what time in hopes that my legions of virtual stalkers will be motivated to move to a more public forum. Sadly, my thousands of fans are too lazy to leave their computers and discreetly watch me eat pancakes at Waffle House.

(Video after the jump) Read the rest of this entry »

According to Scottish psychologist Stuart Brody, unprotected heterosexual sex is strongly correlated with increased levels of mental wellbeing in women and men. He also claims that those who engage in heterosexual sex with a condom are more likely to suffer from depression and stress.

Brody qualified his findings in terms of evolution, claiming that man is genetically programmed to have unprotected sex, as this increases the chances of reproduction. Read the rest of this entry »

Thur. July 30. Swingers Karaoke. ALT Pathway restaurant and lounge. 810 E. Skagway, Ave. Tampa.

Fri-Sat. July 31-Aug 1. ABC and Blacklite Swingers Parties. Come dressed as sexy as you want, just so long as you are wearing Anything But Clothes for the Friday night party. On Saturday night, there will be a Blacklite Party with the heated pool open all night. 9pm. $20-$50 plus the cost of renting a room. Couples and single women only. Ramada Inn. Kissimme FL. For more infor check out the Aahz crew. Read the rest of this entry »

The week leading up to Skin Two, eyes lit up whenever I mentioned I had extra tickets to Secret Room’s fetish party and medical fashion show at The Castle. Friends were excited to finally have a chance to show off their fancy lingerie or to just ogle fetishists in fishnets. Of course when Saturday rolled around, I stood alone in line to The Castle, fighting my impulse to flee.

Normally I pride myself on going out in public wearing one of my wigs and an outfit that highlights my aerodynamic crotch. But, I wasn’t used to wearing a bedazzled codpiece in front of a crowd that thought this sort of thing was normal. Read the rest of this entry »

We all know someone who thinks of himself as a “bad boy,” the kind of guy who claims he can “mack” on any “hooze bag” in a bar. The name “bad boy” is slightly misleading. When I think of bad, I think of UFC fighters or extreme athletes. For the most part, “bad boys” are more of the poser, douche bag variety–the kind of guys who wear trendy clothes featuring the brands of UFC fighters or extreme sports. Douches tend to be ultra conformists who follow trends, are hyper narcissistic, and are completely self centered dick weeds. These are the dudes I spent my high school years hating, and my college years trying to take a few tips from. Despite what you think about douches, they seemingly feast on an endless buffet of one-night-stands. Read the rest of this entry »

Immaculate pool conception: Magdalena Kwitatkowska sued an Egyptian hotel after discovering that her 13-year-old daughter, whom she believes is a virgin, was impregnated by a stray sperm while swimming in the hotel’s pool.

A good excuse: In Australia, charges of driving without a license were dropped after the 24 year-old defendant explained to the judge why he so desperately needed to drive to his cousin’s house: “My cousin was about to [have sex with] this girl and he needed his bag because it had his condoms in it.” Read the rest of this entry »

Sat. July 25. Skin Two of London. An erotic art and fashion party. Three medical fashion shows by Baby Love’s Latex, Maggie Delena, and Ceres Moon Latex. Performances by Gia Nova and Jade Vixen. DJs Jade Vixen, DJ Sean, DJ Neiva, DJ Nemesis. Models: Angelica Syn, Betty Jaded, Carissa, Evelyn Rose, Jade Malice, Kamila, Lagata Negra, Lena, Maus, Secra, Silent K, Steevie Synthetic, Tararyze, and more. Vending by Angelica Syn and Orlando TNG. Fetish wear encouraged: fantasy, goth, glam, cyber, leather, lingerie, uniforms, vinyl etc. $10-15. 18+. The Castle 2004 N. 16th St. Ybor 33605. Read the rest of this entry »

Congressman Steve Buyer (R-Ind) knows how to fund healthcare reform: charge those who engage in sex without condoms higher insurance premiums. Before we dismiss Buyer as another nut who is just trying to slow down healthcare reform, let’s consider the consequences of this proposition.

The first question is how insurance companies would regulate risky sex acts. Would there be a barebacking police who raids your room after a one-night-stand, searching for a used condom? Read the rest of this entry »

In a recent study of 445 Ugandan women whose sexual partners were recently circumcised, 40% reported improvements in their sex lives, 57% claimed no change, and 3% said their sex lives suffered. The reasons these women gave for how sex improved may surprise you: better hygiene, it took longer for men to climax, and their partners wanted more frequent sex. Read the rest of this entry »

Erin Andrews is a professionally hot, ESPN sports reporter whom millions of men have fantasized about seeing naked. Playboy even crowned her America’s Sexiest Sportscaster in 2008. She also happens to be a local girl who attended Bloomingdale High in Valrico, Florida.

Unfortunately some creeper recently videotaped her through a peephole while she changed in her hotel room. As is usually the case with voyeuristic celebrity sex tapes, at first no one was sure the video was of Andrews. However, ESPN recently sent a scathing letter to the owners of websites that published the peephole video, in effect verifying that the woman in the video is Andrews. An excerpt from the letter is posted below. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve seen a number of risque ads in my time (see PETA’s sex with vegetables ad), but I’ve never seen a Sprite used in a bukkake scene (if you don’t know what bukkake means don’t Google it).

This Sprite commercial features an attractive woman performing oral sex on a nude man. Midway through she stops and considers how she could really go for a Sprite right about now.

Enter a crotch level Sprite, which has obviously received some vigorous stimulation. In slow motion, the soda explodes all over the thirsty woman’s face in a mess of fizzy white.

I’d have liked to believe that this ad was created by Sprite’s creative and thrifty marketing group, who knew the spot would be banned and go viral. On the internet the ad would receive a second life, reaching the key demographic of internet surfers like you and me, desperate for something to distract us from work, or unemployment. Read the rest of this entry »

Despite most males’ fondness for their Y chromosome, a new study conducted at Penn State predicts that the male sex chromosome may soon be lopped off–soon in evolutionary time: a few million years.

Before you female readers start celebrating the triumph of the X chromosome over Y, you should know that this prediction is based on the theory that the Y chromosome has evolved at an accelerated rate, causing the chromosome to shed useless genes–like the genes controlling table manners and the need to talk on the phone about nothing for hours. Read the rest of this entry »

Heather Zeo's Facebook pic

A high school math teacher in Pennsylvania, Heather Zeo, was recently arrested for seducing her 17-year-old student and having an inappropriate relationship with another pupil. The student claims that Zeo, a 36-year-old mother of 3, friended him on Facebook (Editor’s note: I’ve since friended Zeo on Facebook and am waiting for a sexy reply). Soon their relationship blossomed from heavy petting in the classroom to a sex romp in the back of Zeo’s minivan, in a Target parking lot.

Zeo joins a long line of female teachers crusading for equality in teacher-student sex scandals, providing further evidence that female teachers are just as horny as high school football coaches. Read the rest of this entry »

Sat. July 18. The grand opening of The Quest’s exercise room and play area. Work out your kinks with the Quest’s newest toys: free weights, a bowflex, and an inversion Bondage table. The Quest. 12517 66th St. N. Largo, FL 33773.

Sat. July 18. Taboo Swinger’s Sexy Superhero Party. It’s time to go into the phone booth and don your alter egos for Taboo’s Sexy Superhero Party!!! Come dressed as your favorite superhero or create your own caped crusader. tabooswingers.com. 9pm. Orlando.

Sat. July 18. Caliente’s Eyes Wide Shut Party. Read the rest of this entry »

The Amora Sex Academy recently opened in Berlin, featuring interactive exhibits designed to increase sexual knowledge and skill. Despite the name, Amora isn’t a kind of “Marital Arts Academy,” where a stern sensei instructs students on various holds and breathing methods. Amora is more like the Bodies exhibit; however, instead of the cadavers of derelict prostitutes Read the rest of this entry »

When I was in public school, I developed such a phobia of sex from my health teachers’ slides of flesh rotting STDs and flamboyant Priests’ speeches about vaginas being highways to hell, that I genuinely feared my dick would spontaneously combust upon touching a girl. Consequently, I was a virgin well into college (actually, the static state of my virginity had more to do with the fact that I couldn’t grow pubic hair until I was 18, but it feels better to blame religion and the government).

But times are changing. Britain’s National Health Service (NHS) just published a pamphlet advising students that it’s their “right” to have an enjoyable sex life. Read the rest of this entry »

1. You can tell if a man is gay based on the size of his fingers.

-See Digital Ratio Theory in psychologytoday.com, which can accurately predict the levels of testosterone and estrogen you were subjected to as a child based on the length of your ring and index fingers. [Editor's Note: Read the article carefully; it does not confirm that the legend about finger size and sexual orientation is "true." Note the concluding paragraph: "'You have to be careful,' he says. 'You can't look at someone's fingers and make a determination about whether they are heterosexual or lesbian, just as you can't decide whether they're neurotic. The [sexuality indicators] are most certainly there, but they’re not strong enough to allow us to make predictions.’”]

Read the rest of this entry »

Unfaithful politicians have been around since, well since as long as there have been politicians. So why do we now expect philandering political figures like Senator John Ensign and Governor Mark Sanford to resign because of an affair? Many Americans see infidelity as a major source of the erosion of morals and marriages in modern times. The truth is that spouses have always been unfaithful, it’s just now more socially acceptable to get divorced over an affair. Samara O’Shea of the Huffington Post goes against the grain in her article on adultery, reminding us that if our society was going to collapse because of adultery, it would have happened a long time ago. Read the rest of this entry »

When creating sexual aids, i.e. porn, for the handicapped, one of the most common misconceptions is that they’re into vanilla sex, but the handicapped are just as freaky as the rest of us. While it may surprise you to learn there’s porn specifically for the blind and deaf, it may shock you to discover that there’s porn for the deaf who are into giantesses (giant women), CGI, feet, vore (being eaten whole), and crushing (being stepped on). Read the rest of this entry »

Sat. July 11th. Mistress Mayhem at The Quest. Tampa’s most wicked dominatrix will be stopping by to discipline naughty submissives. The Quest. 12517 66th St. N. Largo, FL 33773.

Sat. July 11. Ultra-Glam Fetish Party @ Purgatory. Show off your brightest colors, fishnets and animal print patterns, outrageous hair and over-the-top makeup! Custom steel bondage equipment will be set up throughout the club to encourage safe and consensual play. Creative bondage, spanking, flogging, fetish games and the ultimate mind fuck are also encouraged. DJs Danny Bled and Godfather.18+. $15-$20. Purgatory Nightclub. 1000 State Road 84 City, Fort Lauderdale, FL Zip. 33315. Read the rest of this entry »

before parasites it was just a huge sausage-fest

I used to hate parasites, always trying to creep into my body and eat my food–freakin’ freeloading assholes who can’t find a real job. But a new study in The American Naturalist has made me reconsider parasites as evidence suggests that these invasive freeloaders may have spurred the evolution of sex. Read the rest of this entry »

In Novosibirsk Russia, 42 year-old Tatiata Kozhevnikova broke her own Guinness Record by hefting a glass ball attached to 14-kgs (about 31 pounds) of weight with her vagina muscles. Kozhenikova’s success didn’t happen overnight, but through fifteen years of rigorously training her world class vagina.

“After I had a child, my intimate muscles got unbelievably weak,” she said via a bad Russian interpreter. Read the rest of this entry »

Lil' Ricco, ME (THE FUCKIN' BOSS), and D-Block pre-gaming

(Warning: while the below events are basically true, the story is told through the voice of a supreme douche in need of a good bitch slap)

My main BITCH was having a bachelorette party at my pad, complete with rubber dongs and ding-a-ling cakes and shit, so I decided to go COCK OUT with DOUCHE FEST 2009

(Pics and video below break, not suitable for pussies) Read the rest of this entry »

An increasing number of foreigners are visiting Ukraine in search of women. These “sex pats” (a play on expatriates), are becoming increasingly common in developing regions like South America, Asia, and Africa (despite 20% HIV positive populations in some African countries).

The Ukraine has become a breeding ground for “sex pats” for a number of reasons. Read the rest of this entry »

July 2-5. GaYBOR Days 2009.

-Thur. July 2. Weekend Kick-off Social Party. 2 hours of GameWorks fun card. Drag Show. Drinks & Tapas included! Families and adults welcome. $15. Gameworks.
-Fri. July 3. VIP Party at The Nest. 6-9pm. 1430 E. th Ave. Ybor City.
-Fri. July 3. DJ Manny Lehman and Pistol Pete Underwear Fashion Show. 10pm-3am. Steam Fridays 1507 E. 7th Ave. Ybor City.
-Sat. July 4. GaYBOR Poolside Beach Party. 4pm-8pm. $15. Tampa Howard Johnson Riverfront Plaza.
-Sat. July 4. Derrick Barry as Britney Spears. 9pm-3am. G Bar. 1401 E. 7th Ave. Ybor City.
-Sun. July 5. GaYBOR Brunch. 11am-2pm. Streetcar Charlie’s. 1811 N. 15th St. Ybor City.
-Sun. July 5. The GaYBOR Bar Crawl. $20. 5pm- Read the rest of this entry »

A recent study by the Guttmacher Institute reveals that the “withdrawal” or “pullout” method of birth control works nearly as well as condoms when used properly. Before some poor sheep farmer with too many kids first strapped a crude sheepskin condom on, the only birth control people had was pulling out, and the mythological “rhythm method.” Since the rise of latex condoms and birth control pills, pulling-out has increasingly been thought of as being about as effective at preventing pregnancy as a woman jumping up and down after sex. Read the rest of this entry »

Er·o·to·mas·ti·a: n.

1. Sexual feelings induced in a woman by caressing her breasts.

Etymology: From the Greek eros-  (i.e.: Eros- the god of love and sexual desire), sexual love, and mastos- breast.

Use: Susie got a major case of erotomastia when Johnny stole second base.

Fri. June 5. Party with Playboy Playmate Candice Cassidy. Hang out with June’s Playboy Playmate, Candice Cassidy while listen to the DJ styles of Playboy’s 50th Anniversary Playmate, Colleen Shannon. Free. 21+. 8p.m.-10p.m. Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tampa Pool.

Fri. June 5. St. Pete’s First Friday. The first Friday of every month St. Pete throws a block party in the heart of the downtown bar district. Wondering how this qualifies as a Sex and Love event? After the music dies around 10p.m., thousands of drunk, single people flood the bars around Central Ave. for a night of debauchery. The 1st Friday of every month. 5p.m. – 2a.m. Free. Downtown St. Pete. Central Ave., between 2nd St. and 3rd St.

Sat. June 6. Caliente’s Summer Sizzle Caribbean Beach Party. 9pm. Caliente Resort 21240 Gran Via Blvd. Land O Lakes, FL 34637.

Mon. June 8. Miss St. Pete Pride 2009 Pageant. Registration at 6pm. $250 cash prize. 10pm Club Nautico 4900 66th St. N. St. Petersburg, FL 33709. Read the rest of this entry »

At the Bremerhaven Zoo in northern Germany, two gay penguins, Z and Vielpunkt, guard the artificial cave housing their nest. Inside, a 6 week old chick peeks out from behind its adoptive parents.

The chick’s egg was placed in the male’s nest by zoo keepers after the biological parents rejected it. The gay couple incubated the egg for 30 days and continues to care for the chick like a heterosexual pair.

Of the 20 Humboldt penguins the Bremerhaven zoo has tried to mate, 6 are homosexual. Read the rest of this entry »

Every straight male (and some females) have a version of this fantasy: two college-aged girls sitting on a couch, playfully flirting before spontaneously stripping and fondling each other. This is the scene I walk in on Friday.

Two attractive young women share a leather loveseat while watching a muted MTV show. Having just met that morning, the women are overly nice, complimenting the thongs and bras they’ve brought with them in overnight bags. But this isn’t a fantasy: these women are preparing to film their first girl-on-girl scene. Read the rest of this entry »

We’re getting cranked up for Best of the Bay — yes, already — and this year more than ever  we want your input early in the process. We just had a brainstorm meeting to choose award categories for the Readers’ Poll, which we’re expanding this year. We’re in the process of fine-tuning our choices, and we don’t want to miss out on any great ideas.

We’re going to have a bunch of Readers’ Poll categories in Sex & Love. Read the rest of this entry »

Marriage counselor, M. Gary Neuman, polled more than 200 cheating and faithful husbands about fidelity for his book, The Truth About Cheating. Below are some of his surprising findings. Read the rest of this entry »

For much of my life I didn’t think women enjoyed dudes touching their breasts, mainly because my idea of feeling a girl up involved handling her breasts and nipples like a malfunctioning electronic device that needed to be tweaked and prodded in order to work. It wasn’t until I started dating women self confident and mature enough to instruct me, that I realized the breasts can be a huge source of pleasure for women. Read the rest of this entry »

In 2002, the British Board of Film Classification banned 6 minutes of footage from British Cum Queens that showed some of the female actresses ejecting fluid from their vaginas onto other actresses. The board banned the footage, claiming that because female ejaculation did not exist , the actresses were urinating on each other, which is illegal to show in the UK. The board went under attack by Feminists Against Censorship, who sought as much scientific evidence as possible proving that female ejaculation does exist for some. Read the rest of this entry »

In Sharlene Azam’s new book and documentary, Oral Sex Is The New Goodnight Kiss, Azam uncovers the rise of teen prostitution in suburban areas. Azam interviews white high school girls, 13 to 15, who are having sex with as many as 7 men a night. Some are even selling their virginity locally for $1000. These aren’t your prototypical streetwalkers. These are normal, pretty, high school girls who fall into this lifestyle in a quest for attention. Read the rest of this entry »

Fri.-Sun., May 22-24: Fetish Weekend. Itching to break in a whip or have your nipples electrocuted? Toss your best fetish gear in the Honda and head over to Fort Lauderdale for the 14th annual Fetish Weekend. The largest fetish event in North America, this 3-day fiasco attracts 2,000 fetishists to its main ball and its themed socials: the beat & greet, alter ego, extreme players bash, and the pool party. Instead of a wine tasting or appetizer sampling, guests can mingle while “sampling” fetish gear and practices, from bondage to genital torture. Fetish workshops will cover all aspects of kink: pressure fetishes and objectification, body piercings, fire play, rhythmic impact play, and the art of cell-popping-semi-permanent branding with a searing point. Performances by Jackal & Hyde, Samar, Rebecca’s Rubber Room, Rubberdoll, and Ruby Luster. Dress code is strictly enforced so bring a few changes of your best rubber, vinyl, leather, corsets, sexy uniforms, fetish glam, gothic, kinky drag, and ultra formal wear. See Fetishfactory.com for more details.

Sat.-Mon. May 23-25. Caliente’s Memorial Day Weekend Bash. Poolside BBQ, nude gyro-sphere, caricatures, Jell-o wrestling, tiki bar karaoke, and a party later at Fiesta Night Club. 12-4pm. Caliente Resort 21240 Gran Via Blvd. Land O Lakes, FL 34637. Read the rest of this entry »

SUMMER

Florida’s Fetish Weekend. Itching to break in a whip or have your nipples electrocuted? Toss your best fetish gear in the Honda and head over to Fort Lauderdale for the 14th annual Fetish Weekend. The largest fetish event in North America, this 3-day fiesta attracts 2,000 enthusiasts to its main ball and themed socials: “The Beat & Greet,” “Extreme Players Bash” and the pool party. Dress code is strictly enforced so if you’re wearing chaps make sure they’re ass-less. May 22-24. fetishfactory.com.

Gay Days Orlando. Gay Days began 19 years ago as a single day when members of the GLBT community made an organized show of visibility by wearing bright red shirts and invading Disney’s Magic Kingdom. Since then, it’s expanded to a weeklong festival with over 135,000 people attending 40 citywide events, including wine tastings, female impersonator pageants, musical performances, comedy shows and a slew of club and hotel parties. Though Disney has more than a few pants-less, sexually ambiguous characters, the company doesn’t officially sponsor Gay Days, but plenty of other area businesses are out and proud in their support. June 2-8. gaydays.com.

(PICS Below break are NSFW) Read the rest of this entry »

Sex sells, so it makes sense that sex appeal is often used to market the green movement. Several magazines have recently come out with “sexy” ways to go green that are as impractical and as much of an ego stroke as buying a Mini Cooper. While I’m also jumping on the “green sex” bandwagon, I aim to provide ways to go green in the sack that are more practical than sexy.

Don’t have kids!!! Kids are so unsexy. Not only will these little bastards kill your sex life, sully your nightlife, and make it increasingly difficult to afford romantic getaways, they’re also the largest source of pollution worldwide–considering they grow up to become full-fledged consumer-whore polluters like you and me. No environmental organizations or political groups want to admit the evils of children for fear of being misanthropic, but it’s simple math. If you want to reduce the human strain on the earth, reduce the number of people. Instead of donating money to reactionary programs like “feeding the homeless” or “starving children” funds, be proactive by supporting groups like Planned Parenthood that attack the problem at the source.

Use condoms: Never listen to a dirty hippie who claims he doesn’t believe in condoms because they aren’t biodegradable. Read the rest of this entry »

Continuing in our series of summer vacation videos for our Summer Guide 2009, CL’s Sex & Love site editor Shawn Alff discusses his summer plans. Will swine flu ruin his plans for a Mexico wedding? Read the rest of this entry »

Continuing in our series of summer vacation videos, shot for our Summer Guide 2009, here is CL intern Diana Ruiz talking about what she is doing this summer: finishing an online P.E. credit. Read the rest of this entry »

Continuing in our series of summer vacation videos, shot for our Summer Guide 2009, CL Street Teamer Nastacia Maas talks about her favorite summer memory: making corn have sex with itself in Minnesota. Read the rest of this entry »

Alina Percea is the latest in a string of woman who have auctioned off their virginity online to the highest bidder. According to the Daily Mail, Percea, and eighteen-year-old Romanian was hoping to raise £50,000 for school expenses, but only got £8,800 (around $13,500 U.S. dollars).

The winner was an Italian business man, 45, who flew Percea to Venice and met her in the airport with a box of chocolates. After going sightseeing, the two retired to a five star hotel where they exchanges medical certificates, one affirming that Percea was a virgin and the other verifying that he was STD free. After a night of unprotected sex, Percea took the morning after pill during breakfast.

“I was attracted to him, so I enjoyed it,” Percea later told the press, “even though it was quite painful.” Read the rest of this entry »

Sex and desire are ever-present forces in human conflict. However, not until Tennessee Williams‘ A Streetcar Named Desire premiered in 1947 had the physical act of sex been so explicitly depicted on stage as a source of power and dominance. In Streetcar, the New Orleans street, Elysian Fields, is an urban jungle where the laws of nature are the abiding rules of engagement. As in the wild, sex and violence are intimately connected. Intercourse is a product of aggressive competition, dominance, and submission rather than romance. Although Williams repeatedly claimed that this work warned against a world where brutes were allowed to rule, at the play’s end, the dominating and sexually imposing Stanley conquers Blanche, and her illusions of love. Streetcar forces modern audiences to decide if society should not tolerate such carnal behavior, or if there is some logic in following one’s desires down the darker avenues of human experience. Read the rest of this entry »

I’m a little jealous I missed out on the penis popsicles, and the boobs.

(Video below the break NSFW) Read the rest of this entry »

Outrage, a new documentary by Kirby Dick “outs” allegedly closeted republican figures who have anti-gay voting records. Florida Governor Charlie Crist, who recently announced his bid for a 2010 senate seat, is a main target in Dick’s independent film which premiered May 8.

Suspicions of Crist’s homosexuality first arose before his gubernatorial election in a 2006 Palm Beach Post article. A 21 year-old GOP staffer, Jason Wetherington, reportedly boasted to friends that he had sex with Crist and even named Crist’s long-term partner, Bruce Carlton Jordan. Read the rest of this entry »

Fri-Sun. May 8-10. Exxxotica Miami. The largest adult event and expo on the east coast, featuring adult entertainers Jesse Jane, Stoya, Angelina Armani, Riley Steele, Jenna Haze, Ron Jeremy, Sasha Grey, Teagan Presley, Savanna Samson, Bree Olson, Kaydeb Kross, Sunny Leone, Eva Angelina, Alexis Texas, Joanna Angel, and Gina Lynn.

Fri. May 8. Clothing Optional Foam Party. Live Bands, DJ, Foam, a potluck dinner, a pool, hot tub, camping, and nudity. What more could you want? A music video will also be shot on location so bring some friends to fill out the crowd. 7pm. $10. The Riverboat Nudist Club. www.NaturallyNude.com.

Sat. May 9. Foot Party at the Quest. The Fabulous Mistress Diana and friends will be hosting a foot, show, and boot fetish play party. Bring all your fabulous fetish shoes, high heel spikes, your skit kicker boots and your cute little twinkle toes and join us for a stomping good time cleaning, licking, sucking, and worshiping Tampa Bays most fabulous feet. 10pm. $30. The Quest. 12517 66th St. N. Largo, FL 33773. Read the rest of this entry »

Rossellini in a penis forest

Isabella Rossellini, famous model, actress, filmmaker, daughter of Ingrid Bergman and Italian director Roberto Rossellini, has embarked on a new project: Green Porno. Rossellini is responsible for a series of two minute films for the Sundance Channel that look at sex through a surrealist’s lens. These videos are the creative love child of a massive acid-fueled orgy between Sesame Street, Sex-ed films, the Discovery Channel, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and Salvador Dali’s films. While all the information is accurate, Rossellini delivers her lines as if revisiting her role in David Lynch’s Blue Velvet, in which she ran around naked spouting such classic lines as, “He put his disease in me.”  In this video she discusses the mating habits of bees, saying that if she was a male bee, her “penis would break off. It would get stuck in her vagina, like a cork in a bottle.”

(VIDEO after break) Read the rest of this entry »

Fri. May 1. Grand Opening of The Ybor Eagle. Tampa’s newest leather bar is scheduled to open with a bang. No cover and free drinks from 9pm – 11pm. Live appearance by Raging Stallion model Tyler Saint. Leather dress code is strictly enforced. A locker-room is provided for you to get geared up. The club also features and in-house leather store stocked with Raging Stallion products. 1909 N. 15th. Ybor. Largo Florida 3 12517 66th St North Largo Florida 33773.

Mon. May 4. Lingerie Mechanical Bull Riding Contest. Think Urban Cowboy except with hotter girls and less clothing. $1 drinks all night. Girls in lingerie drink free. $1000 in total prize money. Strokers 11236 W. Hillsborough Ave. Tampa, Fl. 33635.

Tues. May 5. Cinco De Mayo Bikini Contest. Florida’s Finest Bikini Babes Presents this contest for $1000. 7pm. Mojo’s 1845 E. Memorial Lakeland, FL 33801.

Tues. May 5. Cinco De Mayo Bury the Burrito Contest. $100 dollar cash prize to whoever can bury the burrito the fastest, I think. I can’t figure this one out. I assume it’s an eating contest, but the judging could be based on style or creativity. Or it could be some new gay code word or fetish I’m not hip to. If you go, please write and tell me what the hell is going down. In any case, 2 hours of an open bar, 9pm-11pm. G.Bar 1401 E. 7th Ave. Ybor City Tampa. Read the rest of this entry »

Sex and the City star, Sarah Jessica Parker, 44, and husband Mathew Broderick, 47, are expecting twin daughters later this summer via a surrogate mother.

Sources close to the couple claim the pair tried unsuccessfully for years to give their 6 year-old-son James Wilkie a sibling naturally, before turning to a surrogate. Although the specific source of the infertility is unknown, the couple’s problems may be linked to Broderick’s absurd sideburns or the fact that Parker is skinnier than a Chinese gymnast. 

The name and address of the surrogate haven’t been released for fear that she will be overwhelmed by couples wanting to have the same ‘baby’s momma’ as Parker. Most surrogate mothers can expect to earn between 10K-25K, but the pay scale for celebrity surrogates is expected to be in the millions. The question many are asking is–does this baby’s momma get double the pay for carrying twice the load?

Read the rest of this entry »

Four years of wrestling with high school boys in spandex forced me to realize a few things about myself and my sexuality. While I discovered I had a taste for overpowering opponents, parading around in tights, and even enduring a certain amount of pain, for me these thrills never translated into the realms of sexual fetishism–but I definitely understand how they could.

As a boy I was a huge professional wrestling fan. My brother and I spent hours on our trampoline reenacting the theatric matches we watched each Saturday morning. Like many kids, we eventually lost interest in professional wrestling when we discovered that while the wrestlers were tremendous athletes, the matches were illusions.

For a long time I never understood why so many adults continued to follow these staged matches when there were alternatives like boxing and MMA fighting.  Then one day I found myself indulging in an awful action movie. I realized that I like the illusion of living through these invincible characters, of overpowering a platoon of trained soldiers and enduring torturous pain at the hands of a crazed villain.

Fetish wrestling fulfills these same needs. It provides an arena where women can become she-gods, tossing opponents around with superhero strength and style. It allows those who like a certain amount of pain to be slammed on a mat beneath a hard body. While I may not want a woman dressed in a mask and cape to throw me in a headlock, I can appreciate the desire to be manhandled. Read the rest of this entry »

Fri, April 24. Extreme BDSM Play Party and Needle Play Demo. Master Q, a member of the BDSM lifestyle for over 30 years, will perform a needle play/piercing demo. The Quest. 12517 66^th St. North Largo Florida 33773. 12517 66th St North Largo Florida 3 12517 66th St North Largo Florida 33773.

Fri, April 24. Strokers 1 Year Anniversary and $1000 Bikini Contest/Calendar Search. Come celebrate Strokers 1 year anniversary party with a free buffet at 7pm and live music at 8pm. Hosted by DJ Mingle Mixx. At 11pm, floridasfinestbikinibabes.com will host a $1000 bikini contest. Contact floridasfinestbikinibabes.com for more info. Read the rest of this entry »