Daily Loaf

It’s a huge turn-on when, in the heat of passion, the connections are seamless. It’s like driving a manual car: in the hands of a competent driver, the ride is as seamless as in an automatic. You start off in first gear, getting the engine warm, then really get the wheels turning in second. Next you switch to third and things are really starting to heat-up. In fourth she really shows what she’s worth, and if you’re lucky, you can get into fifth. From there it’s a smooth drive. Some men can switch gears in the bedroom like professionals; others fumble through the steps like a kid forced to drive a stick shift for the first time in driver’s ed, stalling several times and having to start over.

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Growing up as an only-child, I rarely made sacrifices. I was late in learning how to share, have patience, and practice selflessness. Now I’m dealing with the consequences. It’s impossible to be in a serious relationship without learning how to surrender.

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Cheating: to practice fraud or deceit; or informally to be sexually unfaithful.

Although this definition seems clear-cut, what constitutes cheating in a relationship is often ambiguous. For some, cheating includes intercourse but not oral sex. Some count French kissing but not closed mouth kisses. But what about holding hands or snuggling — physical acts that are more associated with emotional connections than physical acts of passion? To take it a step further, can you cheat without physically touching someone else? Is fantasizing about someone else during sex cheating? What about flirting online? Believe it or not, Wikipedia actually has a page for this subject, describing it as an affair of the heart. Read the rest of this entry »

Women either love receiving oral sex or hate it; there’s no in-between. I don’t understand how you can hate something that can be so pleasurable, and sometimes, quite frankly, that will  give you the best orgasm you have ever had. Self-conscious thoughts should be thrown out the window ladies because the smell, taste, or sight won’t be enough to make him stop if he knows you are getting pleasure from him. Unless of course you really need to take care of the aforementioned items discussed in my post, 5 turn-offs for him.

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After some serious thought and input from a few close male friends, I formed this list of five common turn-offs for men. Disclaimer: this is not the TOP five, but merely five things women do or possess that are complete and utter turn-offs. I also suggest that female readers ask your well-kept and clean male friends their opinion on if you can check yourself off this list.

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At my former job I met a man I’ll call Scott. Scott came in multiple times to specifically seek my advice and stayed roughly an hour each visit. We talked about each others’ lives, specifically love and sex; I like to think these subjects are my forte and I talk about them with most everyone. The majority of the the conversations were about his ex and recent dates he went on. Once, when it was time for Scott to leave, I was on my way out for lunch. As we walked out together I said, “You know I don’t have that many good guy friends that I can chat with around here. We should be friends.”

He shot me a curious smile and gave me his phone number. We occasionally shot each other a text about our bad experiences with Verizon and the like, but then things went in a direction I wasn’t expecting.

Via text he asked, “What do you want?”

I laughed and said, “Well nothing. You know I’m not single, right?” I figured Facebook would have given him that answer.

“I’m not looking for anything serious,” he wrote. “You’re a cool girl and all, but I’m not looking for anything ’serious’ with you.”

I could not believe what I was hearing. I legitimately thought he wanted to be my friend, but in the end he just wanted to fuck. I ended communication with Scott immediately and called a close male friend to vent.

As naive as it sounds, I have never been asked out-right to be a friend-with-benefits. Don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with that, but I honestly did not think he had an ulterior motive. I was very, very wrong.

This got me thinking of other scenarios with male “friends.” Two of my close male friends have told me that we couldn’t be friends or talk as much, because of trust issues with their partners. When did I cross a line where it’s not OK to be friends with males, especially if they are in a relationships?

I have always had more male than female friends and am confused as to why this relationship seems taboo to many. I can understand how a girlfriend would get jealous if I had slept with or dated these male friends, but otherwise I’m lost. The worst part is that I have been friends with one guy long before he met his recent beau, so why should I have to give him up as a friend?

My boyfriend and I have an exponential amount of trust for one another and I think this is what is lacking in couples that “forbid” their partner to have friends of the opposite sex. I feel that if you do not have friends of the opposite sex for fear of what will happen in your own relationship, you are missing out on some major life experiences, and I don’t mean sexually.

Why am I just now learning this unspoken rule? After some thought I think I have found a solution: the friend needs to meet the partner in order to convey a sense of trust and to prove that he/she has no ulterior motives. But is the rule only applicable to people in marriages or relationships? What about single people? I need some perspective on this one? What do you all think?

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Everyone has their preferences when it comes to the opposite sex. I prefer dark hair, light eyes, and a man who stays in-shape. I focus on my figure and expect the same from men. However, don’t misunderstand me when I say preferences. I prefer certain characteristics, as do all women, but there are some things that are major turn-offs for most females.

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I’m at the point in my life where almost everyone I know is getting engaged. I’ve been to three weddings this year, which is more than I’ve attended in my entire life. I’m surrounded by my friends with “wedding fever.” If they’ve been in a long-term relationship, they’re pushing for a proposal. If they’re single, they’re rushing to find someone. Why the sudden rush?

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Four different qualities can describe a woman: hot, beautiful, sexy, and sensual. Hot can be easily achieved with the right clothes, hairstyle, and make-up. Beautiful is, take your breath away, crack a smile smitten. Sexy is an attitude that can be displayed through body language and accentuated with clothing. Sensual is more of an action that stems from sexy, her sexual undertones and mannerisms all relate back to a sexy female, and of course, sex.

Sex doesn’t always have to be about sex. Having a partner that is sensual can make your mood that much better. However, you don’t always have to have sex to be sensual. A few simple acts, sans penetration, can get your blood flowing and lift your libido. Here are a few sensual scenarios that capture sensuality without sex. Read the rest of this entry »

Everyone has a list… a list of people you are allowed to sleep with while you’re in a relationship. For some, the realization of this list may not actually be “allowed,” but the list exists nonetheless.

In the beginning of my four year relationship, my boyfriend and I both mentioned people on our respective lists. I originally thought it was strange to talk about other people we lusted after, but times have changed and the list continues to evolve. I’ve seen a few of the people on my list recently and wasn’t impressed. They have since been replaced.

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Remember when you actually had to speak to a person face-to-face to attract a date? Well times have changed and so has the world of relationships. Social networking Web sites like our beloved Facebook have caused major rifts between couples. A study by the University of Guelph, involving more than 300 college students, found that Facebook causes jealousy among romantic partners. Much of this resulted from a partner being Facebook friends with his or her ex. Read the rest of this entry »

Ginger, carrot top, and the dreaded fire crotch. These names assaulted me throughout adolescence. Some kids even called my hair orange, while I said it was strawberry blond, as if the blond somehow redeemed the rogue reddish tint. Classmates identified me as “Emmalee, you know, the red head.” I begged my mom to let me dye my hair a “normal” color, but she always said no.

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As a 20-something female I have more competition for guys my age than I realized. I now have to watch my back for cougars. You know the type, 40-something women prowling for younger men–my 20-something men. Some of these women have even been divorced or have children. I have to give them credit. I cannot imagine looking for a man while working full-time or being a full-time-mom.

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DNA tests have confirmed that former Presidential candidate, John Edwards, is the father of Rielle Hunters’s 18-month-old daughter, Frances. Even more surprisingly, National Enquirer broke the story.

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In the U.S., we are accustomed to such sexual oddities as a grandmother talking about dildos, sexual positions, and STDs on TV (i.e. Sex with SueTV). However, in Lebanon sex is not an appropriate TV subject. After appearing on Lebanese Broadcast Channel, LBC, Mazen Abdul-Jawad, 32, has gone into hiding for openly discussing foreplay techniques and tips for picking up women in the Saudi Red Sea city of Jeddah.

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Rodell Veree, 50, was charged with having sex with a horse after the horse’s and stable owner, Barbara Kenley, filmed him in the act on videotape. This isn’t the first time Veree has been caught having barnyard sex. Last year he pleaded guilty to buggery with the same horse, Sugar. Kenley couldn’t believe it was the same man and the same horse.

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Since MTV’s The Hills began in the summer of 2006, Heidi Montag has gone from Lauren Conrad’s sweet best friend to Spencer Pratt’s feisty vixen. Montag has seemingly tried everything to stay in the celebrity spotlight, starting with her awful music video (directed by her new husband, Spencer) of Montag running and rolling on the beach in a bikini.

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Some like to be dominated. Others are turned on by feet. Fantasies and fetishes are distinctly different, but a fantasy can include a fetish. After writing the article, Sex Outside the Box, I starting thinking about fantasies and fetishes. A sexual fantasy begins as a thought and is an event or act that isn’t normally played out in the bedroom. If you’re lucky you may be able to act upon this fantasy. A fetish can be an object or an act that isn’t considered outright sexual in nature. Either way a person can’t get off without incorporating their fetish. Read the rest of this entry »

The well-known Victoria’s Secret model, Marisa Miller stripped down in the August 2009 issue of GQ magazine while her colleague Gisele Bundchen is making news in her recent marriage to NFL Patriots quarterback, Tom Brady. The sexy Victoria’s Secret vixens make for a solid competition of Who Would You Screw?

Known for his chiseled abs and mesmerizing eyes, Tyson Beckford has strutted the runway for Ralph Lauren and has appeared on the cover, and in spreads, of GQ, Vogue and Essence magazine. His sex appeal puts him on my top ten list of hot models. Wentworth Miller, on the other hand, has made the transition from model to actor. Known for his role on Prison Break, Miller has been the face of some ingenious Gap ads and has been seen on the covers of Details and GQ. His green eyes and rock hard body makes for a great competitor of Who Would You Screw?

Vote after the jump:

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An intense match between the Sexy Swiss, Roger Federer, and Amazing American, Andy Roddick, in the Wimbledon finals made for some great tennis TV this weekend. The match ended with a 16-14 marathon fifth set — the longest in Grand Slam history.  Federer aced Roddick, taking the victory for the No. 1 tennis player in ATP rankings.

The Williams’ sisters battled it out in a close match for the women’s singles title at Wimbledon. Little sister Serena pulled out her third Wimbledon championship and beat her older sister Venus: 7-6 6-2.

Who would you rather have sex with from Wimbledon? Vote now!

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Follow Emmalee on Twitter at twitter.com/emmaleeschmidt

What would you say if I told you that sex–passionate, raw, primal sex–is a legitimate way of exercising and keeping off the pounds? Read the rest of this entry »

People underestimate the power of relationships. Some bonds are never broken and then some were never meant to exist at all. It takes two strong people willing to compromise to keep themselves and their partners happy. The ebb and flow of a relationship is natural, but sometimes I wonder if the two wavelengths will ever be in sync. Read the rest of this entry »

Attention heterosexuals: how much would you need to be paid to sleep with a person of the same sex? $100? $1,000? Would you work at a gay club or bar and flirt with the same sex if it meant doubling or even tripling your income? Recently, I broached the topic of being gay for pay with a group of friends and opinions varied.

I’ve always had the belief that the majority of the population, respectfully excluding homosexuals, have had thoughts about experimenting with the same sex. The difference between being bi-sexual or homosexual and straight is the actual act occurring. I would not consider someone having fantasies about girl-on-girl or guy-on-guy sex bi-sexual or gay. Fantasies are simply the marriage between your imagination and curiosity, acting out those fantasies is different.
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I can remember back in high school when I finally met him. Scooby, as he is known, was the first male friend that I did not have a romantic interest in — and I was ecstatic. Of course, I was very much interested in his best friend at the time, but that is irrelevant, so I digress. I started thinking the other day about all the male friends I have in my life and how at one point or another I have found all of them attractive.

I have always been the type to make more male friends than female friends, and I could never understand why. Throughout my high school years, any male that I came in contact with I would automatically fall “in love” with. My hormones were erupting and I would envision him and me together – someday. But then Scooby came along. It was not because he was unattractive or boring; in fact he was and still is quite the opposite. His punk rock persona paired with his great body (he was a high school wrestler) did not have the slightest affect on me. To this day I don’t know what snapped in my brain, but I just was not interested in him.
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[Ed. Note: Click here for a review of Megan Fox strutting her stuff in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.]

Megan Fox is filming the new horror flick Jennifer’s Body about a teenage cheerleader who becomes possessed and kills all the small-town boys one by one. Rumors have floated around about semi-nude scenes with the actress.

Read more about the movie here.

Topless photos of Fox were recently leaked and sources say she is not planning on taking legal action.

Photos below the jump [NSFW]:

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After countless conversations about sex with friends, I was sad when I realized that a lot of people don’t try anything out of the ordinary in the bedroom. I can remember when I suggested something obscure to my boyfriend and how excited he was to know that I was on the same level. This brings me to my point: stepping outside your comfort zone with sex can make your sex life and everyday life much better.

I have thought of five creative suggestions to bring more pleasure in your sex life.

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I’ve been told that I’m a flirt. Yes, I’m in a long-term relationship, but apparently my personality could be defined as “flirtacious.” For years I adamantly denied that I flirted, but I realized it when I started thinking about certain techniques girls can use to pick-up guys. I have definitely used these techniques and can honestly say that if done correctly these have all worked in grabbing a guy’s attention. I’ve narrowed it down to the top five.

1. Extended gaze Read the rest of this entry »

As a contributor to this wonderful Sex & Love site I got to thinking about the two terms: sex and love. Sex is defined as the act of engaging in sexual intercourse whereas love is defined as a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. Love comes in a variety of forms. For example, you can love your mom and your significant other but in very different ways. For the purposes of this column, when I talk about love, I’m talking about romantic love.

The two words are inextricably linked. I know you can have sex without love, but can you have romantic love without sex? Can you have a passionate and tender affection for another person your entire life and never have sex with them? I’ve recently asked many of my friends this question and I’ve gotten both answers. Read the rest of this entry »

There is a different sex position for every day of the week, but there are definitely some favorites among men and women. I surveyed a group of men and women and found some very interesting results about their personal favorite positions and what they believe is the opposite sex’s favorite.

Top 5 Favorite Positions for men

1. Doggy style

2. Girl on Top

3. Missionary

4. Reverse cowgirl

5. Seated

Top 5 Favorite positions for women: (after the jump) Read the rest of this entry »

Recently a male friend told me I was a “semi-virgin.” How can someone be a semi-virgin? Is that when you don’t know your partner’s name, or if you’re drunk, or if you only engage in nontraditional forms of sex?  To this guy, I was a semi-virgin because I have only slept with one person. This begs the question: how many people do I have to sleep with until I’m officially not a virgin? More importantly, when did being picky with sexual partners warrant its own category?

I wanted to wait until I found someone that mattered before I cashed my v-card. I had plenty of opportunities, but none fit the bill. My friends all have different opinions on the subject. Some are fellow semi-virgins and others have forfeited their virginity–many times over. But, this semi-virgin talk got me thinking. What does virginity mean today? Read the rest of this entry »

If a woman says she doesn’t, she most definitely does, unless she is Janet Reno. Even if she only did it once when she was really bored, drunk, horny, sexually frustrated, or using her neck massager on a daily basis, she did it, and it’s time we women start fessing up before we brainwash another generation of girls into thinking female masturbation is wrong.

Once in college my friend and I bought a vibrator for our mutual friend’s birthday thinking it was the perfect gift. Little did we know she’d be terrified by the little vibrating piece of rubber. With the toy still unopened, I passed it on to another friend in a long-distance relationship who uses it to this day. But this got me thinking. Why do women feel like they can’t openly discuss pleasuring themselves when self-gratification seems to be all some guys talk about? Read the rest of this entry »

Have you ever dated someone who is much more into you? Or, have you been the person who has to tell yourself to stop obsessively calling your potential love interest? The ebb and flow of hormones in our bodies can make this situation infinitely more complex.

After four years in a relationship, friends tell me they still face this dilemma. “Sometimes I like him more… then sometimes he is way too into me.”

The book Marriage in Motion , by Richard Stanton Schwartz and Jacqueline Olds, discusses the problems of actual couples to illustrate the perpetual motion of relationships: “Relationships are always in motion. Shifting feelings of closeness are an aspect of their essential nature, not a demonstration of an indi­vidual’s character flaws.” Read the rest of this entry »

I see him standing at my bedroom door so vividly that my heart begins pounding with the rippling of his muscles beneath his tight blue t-shirt. Is this real? My dream self never knows for sure but never says no to this night caller. I know this is wrong, that I shouldn’t even be fantasizing about this man, but my desire is beyond logic, and I can see the same fire glinting in his eyes…

Everyone has there own version of this sex dream–a dream so good you have it over and over.  It is so intense you pop awake in the middle of the night and can’t go back to bed, or it stays with you hours into the day. For me, this dream happened only once, months ago, but I can’t shake it from my head. Occasionally I have these sex dreams so vivid and memorable that they play on loop in my head until the next fantasy wakes me in the middle of the night. Read the rest of this entry »