As much as the Cat in the Hat had Thing 1 and Thing 2 to keep him entertained on rainy days, I have Boob 1 and Boob 2.
Most times, in the privacy of my own home, they don’t do a whole hell of a lot for me. They get in the way, I spill things on them, and they prevent me from seeing my lower body when looking directly down. Buuuut, when I take them outside… oh the places we go! Read the rest of this entry »
Few things in life are certain. We’re born. We die. And somewhere in between the two, we all get our hearts broken at least once. There’s no escaping it. It’s as inevitable as the rising and the setting of the sun. That is the risk we take for the giddy, glorious feeling of being in love.
I’ve certainly experienced my share of heartbreak, beginning in the 5th grade when Benny Buffamante threw me over for Mary Rose Kelly. Who could blame him, really? With her big blue eyes and long, golden curls, she was adorable. Plus, she had three first names! How could I compete with that!?!?
I survived being spurned by Benny and lived to love again. And, of course, my heart was stomped on many more times in the process. I’d like to think that it made me stronger and more resilient. I’d like to think that, but the truth is that each time I lost in love, it hurt just as much as the time before. Thank heavens I met my Mr. Right before my tender heart was completely pummeled into a quivering, bleeding mass of mush!
Although I don’t normally advocate self-medicating with food, there are some situations where a decadent, sticky, gooey, creamy and chewy dessert is just what the doctor ordered — and a broken heart is one of them. Allow me to introduce you to just such a treat: Break-Up Bars! Read the rest of this entry »
The week leading up to Skin Two, eyes lit up whenever I mentioned I had extra tickets to Secret Room’s fetish party and medical fashion show at The Castle. Friends were excited to finally have a chance to show off their fancy lingerie or to just ogle fetishists in fishnets. Of course when Saturday rolled around, I stood alone in line to The Castle, fighting my impulse to flee.
Normally I pride myself on going out in public wearing one of my wigs and an outfit that highlights my aerodynamic crotch. But, I wasn’t used to wearing a bedazzled codpiece in front of a crowd that thought this sort of thing was normal. Read the rest of this entry »
We all know someone who thinks of himself as a “bad boy,” the kind of guy who claims he can “mack” on any “hooze bag” in a bar. The name “bad boy” is slightly misleading. When I think of bad, I think of UFC fighters or extreme athletes. For the most part, “bad boys” are more of the poser, douche bag variety–the kind of guys who wear trendy clothes featuring the brands of UFC fighters or extreme sports. Douches tend to be ultra conformists who follow trends, are hyper narcissistic, and are completely self centered dick weeds. These are the dudes I spent my high school years hating, and my college years trying to take a few tips from. Despite what you think about douches, they seemingly feast on an endless buffet of one-night-stands. Read the rest of this entry »
July 2-5. GaYBOR Days 2009.
-Thur. July 2. Weekend Kick-off Social Party. 2 hours of GameWorks fun card. Drag Show. Drinks & Tapas included! Families and adults welcome. $15. Gameworks.
-Fri. July 3. VIP Party at The Nest. 6-9pm. 1430 E. th Ave. Ybor City.
-Fri. July 3. DJ Manny Lehman and Pistol Pete Underwear Fashion Show. 10pm-3am. Steam Fridays 1507 E. 7th Ave. Ybor City.
-Sat. July 4. GaYBOR Poolside Beach Party. 4pm-8pm. $15. Tampa Howard Johnson Riverfront Plaza.
-Sat. July 4. Derrick Barry as Britney Spears. 9pm-3am. G Bar. 1401 E. 7th Ave. Ybor City.
-Sun. July 5. GaYBOR Brunch. 11am-2pm. Streetcar Charlie’s. 1811 N. 15th St. Ybor City.
-Sun. July 5. The GaYBOR Bar Crawl. $20. 5pm- Read the rest of this entry »
Don't worry, the fellas clean up pretty good…
I didn’t tell my husband where we were going. I really should have after suggesting he wear his pink polo shirt. It’s a stereotype, I know, but I couldn’t resist. I’m not saying he voted for McCain, but I’m pretty sure he voted for Reagan. Twice. I called earlier in the day and asked “Hey, babe, wanna go see a play tonight?” Rhetorical question; the answer is and must always be “Sure.”
3 Guys in Drag Selling Their Stuff: The name alone is enough to get me in the door. The bar in the Crown Theater with half-price drinks ensures that we will stay through intermission. Never been to Club Nautico, never knew there was a theater in the back room, never knew there was a back room. Gypsy Productions can be counted on to bring fun, campy, sometimes poignant shows to Tampa Bay audiences and they rarely make me feel like I wasted an evening. 3 Guys… was no exception. It may not change your life but it may make you change your red muumuu.
Press Release:
(Tampa, FL) Calling all country gals! The Dallas Bull is looking for thirteen lovely ladies to be featured in their 2010 calendar. With all of the attention gained from the 2009 calendar, the upcoming year is sure to be a success.
Read the rest of this entry »
The dating scene has changed since our parents were trolling the bars. It’s 2009 and finally women are taking the initiative, approaching guys with pick-up lines. Sure, there’s the cheesy ones that make us cringe…but when delivered well, still work. But I’m not talking about those gimmicky lines. I’m talking about the memorable lines that struck up a good conversation, and often led to some bedroom escapades. Don’t get me wrong…these are VERY simple, but they work, probably because they are so sincere.
Fri-Sun. May 8-10. Exxxotica Miami. The largest adult event and expo on the east coast, featuring 
adult entertainers Jesse Jane, Stoya, Angelina Armani, Riley Steele, Jenna Haze, Ron Jeremy, Sasha Grey, Teagan Presley, Savanna Samson, Bree Olson, Kaydeb Kross, Sunny Leone, Eva Angelina, Alexis Texas, Joanna Angel, and Gina Lynn.
Fri. May 8. Clothing Optional Foam Party. Live Bands, DJ, Foam, a potluck dinner, a pool, hot tub, camping, and nudity. What more could you want? A music video will also be shot on location so bring some friends to fill out the crowd. 7pm. $10. The Riverboat Nudist Club. www.NaturallyNude.com.
Sat. May 9. Foot Party at the Quest. The Fabulous Mistress Diana and friends will be hosting a foot, show, and boot fetish play party. Bring all your fabulous fetish shoes, high heel spikes, your skit kicker boots and your cute little twinkle toes and join us for a stomping good time cleaning, licking, sucking, and worshiping Tampa Bays most fabulous feet. 10pm. $30. The Quest. 12517 66th St. N. Largo, FL 33773. Read the rest of this entry »
When I explored the Bay area cocktail scene a couple of months ago, I was struck again by how trite and bland most bar and restaurant mixed drink lists are. I guess it reflects the food scene, which is also behind the times in our area, but c’mon: cocktails are easier. Or, if not easier, than simpler to experiment. Think of flavors, start mixing, taste, judge and refine the recipe until it’s right, like a kid with a brand new chemistry set.
So, in the hopes that it will spur some imaginations among the bartenders and mixmasters of Tampa Bay, I have a challenge: Read the rest of this entry »
With cool, high-end joints like Ocean Prime and Aquaknox opening in recent weeks, it seems a little strange that a place like Datz Deli (2616 S. MacDill Ave., Tampa, 813-831-7000) is consuming the attention of many Bay area foodies. Actually, considering the economy — and Tampa’s distinct lack of big-time New York-style delis — maybe that’s not so surprising after all.
By all accounts, Datz’s opening last week was madhouse. Yesterday, though, they started doing table service, so I popped in for a look (and a couple overstuffed sandwiches, of course). Read the rest of this entry »
Illustration by stopmangohome
How do bartenders make money? By selling drinks to thirsty people and hopefully receiving a generous percentage in return. To maximize this symbiotic relationship, a bar needs customers, product and access all in good measure.
Now put yourself in the scene at a local watering hole on a recent Friday night. There are people everywhere, at least three to four deep at the bar. Bartenders and guests alike are shouting to be heard. Lots of men in Ed Hardy shirts and women exposing most of what, if not their mama, then the doctor gave them. There’s component number one.
Look at all the shiny, liquid-filled bottles behind the bar. Some are caramel-colored, some golden, some clear and some are even green. All are enticing with a promise of escape and relaxation. There’s component number two.
However, there’s a problem with component number three: no one can make it to the bar. Read the rest of this entry »
(click button for feed)
(follow us on Facebook)
(follow us on Twitter)