Daily Loaf

This week, we’re back in the Champagne Room (aka: the podcast bunker) to kvetch about episode 7 of  Top Chef. (What did you think this was, the Project Runway Podcast?)

Was this episode painfully boring or was it just my short attention span? I’m going to sum it up much like the cheftestants had to get the specs for their Quickfire dish, Cookstr-style: Tired, bland, and contrived. Tyler Florence (insert Applebee’s sellout joke here) didn’t even add to the excitement as the guest judge:  he lacks the street cred that the majority of the prior guest judges this season had.

For the Quickfire Challenge, the chefs had to create a dish using the three description words that the Cookstr slot machine gave them. What is “stressed” food, by the way? ‘Stress food’, as in, a pint of Ben & Jerry’s? Or maybe a lobster that was just dropped into a boiling cauldron of water. I digress. Ultimately, we learned that passing off a Middle Eastern dish with Indian curry to Padma just doesn’t fly, Jersey Mike really knows his Asian food- note the sarcasm, and Ceveech sure loves her scallops (maybe we’ll start calling her ‘Top Scallop’ from now on).

For the Elimination Challenge, the players drew knives to see who they’d be teamed up with to cook a potluck-style dinner for Tyler Florence and Macy’s Culinary Council (some great chefs they gave no background info on)…in their own home kitchen. 10 chefs + 1 home kitchen = madness. Each team got a mystery bag of ingredients they had to use in their dish, along with whatever was in the pantry. The only major drama in this part of the episode was the pairing of Jersey and Robin, Angry Brother (Mike V.) losing power to his electric wok, and Ashley’s over salted gnocchi.

Ceveech ends up taking the win, getting a $10k gift card from Macy’s, which hopefully she’ll end up spending on a new wardrobe and on an entire makeover (too bad you can’t buy class). Much to my delight, greaseball Ben Folds was sent packing for her salty gnocchi and all-around bad idea for a dish. The show will feel much cleaner now.

Highlights: The horrid clothes this episode (namely Padma, Tom, and Ben Folds), Ash sure knows how to set a table (is this Top Tablescape Artist?), Hot Bro (Bryan) gets all sassy and puts everyone in their place for ragging on his lil’ bro, and where the heck is Whatsherface (Laurine) this episode?

Hear the hilarious podcast after the jump:
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This week, we’re back to rag on episode 4 of the new season on Top Chef. I do have to say, since they’ve been cutting the fat (2 people went home this week) it’s been getting better.

This episode had French written all over it: a Quickfire judged by Daniel Boulud featuring escargot (snails), an Elimination Challenge involving pairing classical French sauces with French-related proteins (i.e.: frog’s legs, rabbit, lobster), and a dining table filled with some of the most famous French chefs of our time: Joel Robuchon (The “Unicorn”), Daniel Boulud, Hubert Keller, Laurent Tourondel, and Jean Joho.

Highlights from our Podcast: We slip into French accents to set the mood, Jeff describes how dirty “Ben Folds” (Ashley) is, the debate over Frenchy’s (Mattin) sexuality and if he has a thing for Jersey Mike, Katie thinks “Ceveech” (Jennifer) and “Angry Brother” (Mike V.) are ‘banging’ out a lot more than dishes, “Jack Black” (Jesse- pictured at right) finally gets set free, and we take a stab at predicting our trifecta for the finale.

Check out season 4’s Richard Blais’ post on his thoughts about last week’s episode, and about the common ingredient used last week: mustard (plus a great recipe for agave nectar mustard).

Hear the hilarious podcast after the jump:

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This week, we’re back for round 3 of the new season on Top Chef. (Editor’s Note: Our podcast was more exciting than this episode, so listen to it even if you haven’t seen the episode yet.)

The quickfire challenge was to make and “out-of-this-world” potato dish and the cheftestants served up some interesting spuds. I was very impressed with Ashley (”Ben Folds”) for pulling off gnocchi in 45 minutes. But Jennifer (”Ceveech”) ended up taking the win with mussels in a potato broth (I did not agree with this win, but you’ll have to listen to the podcast to hear my reasoning).

For their elimination, the chefs had to cook for 300 airmen and their families at an Air Force base. The catch- they had to use some canned items and their kitchens had no burners, just large ovens and tilt skillets. For some reason, the chefs decided to pair up into teams, even though they were not instructed to. This, obviously, became the demise for a few of them. Highs: The Atlanta “fat kids”, Eli and Kevin (”Redbeard”), pulled off some delicious-looking pulled pork and Southern potato salad and the less hotter brother (Michael V.) did some slab bacon in a lettuce leaf – because bacon makes everything taste better, even salad). Lows: Laurine and Preeti’s dull pasta salad and Michael I.’s (”Jersey Mike”) Greek oil-poached shrimp salad. After not getting why she was in the bottom three again (and arguing about it), Preeti (”Phranc”) was sent packing.

I am disappointed in this episode yet again. The dishes in the elimination challenge weren’t that impressive – as we said in the podcast: “If you (the viewer) can cook one of these dishes at home, you’re (the cheftestant) probably packing your knives.”  Maybe when they start knocking more people off we’ll be able to get down to the more talented contestants and also get to know their cooking styles better.

The only highlights from this episode: Padma’s “desert skank” wear and massive amounts of cleavage at the air base, Ron the “Chowder King”, and all of our Top Gun jokes (bonus: Jeff sings some more).

Check out season 4’s Richard Blais’ post on his thoughts about last week’s episode, discussing the simple vs. contrived dishes (cooking for the diners vs. for the judges).

Hear the Top Gun Chef podcast after the jump:
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This week, we were fortunate enough to get Jeff Houck back in the studio to join the old gang so we could rag on the new season on Top Chef.

This season we have 17 fresh faces, many of them with titles and accolades under their belts – not to mention all of the tattoos and piercings all over their bodies. During episode one, we meet the new cheftestants, get to see the new Vegas style twist to the show (winning $15k and/or immunity for every Quickfire Challenge), and learn that a seitan-filled chile relleno just doesn’t cut it to stay on this show.

During episode two, the remaining 16 got to have a battle of the sexes challenge and cater for a bachelor/ette party. While the girls talked a big game, it turns out that they just couldn’t stand up to what the guys dished out and another female got sent home.

Personally, I’m somewhat disappointed with the females this season, besides “Ceveech” (Jennifer C. – but she annoys me anyway). I wanted to see some more Jamies (last season) or Elias (season 2). Luckily, we have some really talented male chefs (3 from Atlanta) who are all executive chefs and sous chefs – with awards out the wazoo – who are rockin’ it out every week.

Highlights: Todd English’s sex appeal, the Gay List (we’re up to 3 now), Rule #1 in Top Chef, the Cain and Abel of this season, and the chefs get all wet.

Check out season 4’s Richard Blais’ post on his thoughts about the episode and cast (he’s totally blogging for us now).

Hear the hilarious podcast after the jump:
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This is it — the final episode, where we learn who is the Master of the Top Chefs.

I was quite impressed with this episode because they did away with the drama and really focused on the food (well, there was some nail-biting drama at the final judging). The chefs had to cook a four-course meal that told a story about their culinary career: Their earliest food memory, the experience that made them want to become a chef, their first restaurant, and where they’re heading in the future with their career. Their dishes were gorgeous (except for Michael’s whole fried fish) and made me want to reach through the screen to taste them.

Tom Colicchio, Padma Lakshmi and the five former Top Chef winners joined the judges to feast upon the cheftestants’ dishes (yes, Hosea is still alive). We also got to see some old pictures of the chefs, from childhood to their early career days — not pretty pictures, these guys definitely were late bloomers.

Highlights: Rick Bayless’ orgasmic mole (mo-lay, as in, the sauce) which took Jay Rayner’s “mole [mo-lay] virginity”; our fantasy Padma-on-Kelly chick fight; Keller’s former life as a dirty hippie; Chiarello’s diss at James Oseland; Jay wanting to bathe with Gail in Chiarello’s food; and the revelation of the winner.

At the end of our podcast, we discussed the new season of Top Chef and ragged on the newbies (and their crazy body art), but tune in next week to hear our rants on the first and second episodes of the season. Yes, we’re continuing this podcast — much to your delight.

Hear the exciting podcast after the jump:
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In this episode, the master chefs had to shop only from one specific aisle in the grocery store for their Quickfire Challenge. I’m sorry, let me correct myself – from Whole Foods Market, having traveled there in their Lexus, and bringing along their handy Gladware storage containers to store the food which would be cooked in/on GE appliances. Oh, and all while sipping on Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper (did I get all of the sponsors in?).

The Elimination Challenge was somewhat tricky: each cheftestant had to shop for another to create a mystery box of ingredients. The recipient of that box then had to choose seven items to utilize in their dish. So each chef decided to totally screw the other one over by giving them crazy ingredients, and Roy Yamaguchi got pissed and went Samaurai on everyone. (No, not really, I just wanted to create some drama for this episode that had to be the most drama-free, playing-it-nice episode yet. *yawn*). No Jay Rayner this week again but we feel all of the brown-colored ingredients on Johnathan Waxman’s plates sufficed to replace Jay’s mole in this episode.

Highlights: Gail Simmons‘ chest as a topic of much conversation (again), Kelly Choi looking very much in need of a proper meal and a better stylist as usual (no, we don’t know who she’s wearing), Johnathan Waxman needs glasses, Art Smith’s lovey-dovey teary-eyed speech at the judges table, and Roy Yamaguchi wanting to be “friends forever” with his new chef pals.

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This week, we were again graced with the presence of Jeff Houck (The Stew), as well as the usual suspects: Taylor Eason, Stephen Hammill, and yours truly, Katie Machol.

Our cheftestants had to participate in another MacGyver-style (or MacGruber, as we like to think) elimination challenge: The One Armed Egg Challenge! (Not as dirty as it sounds, though Anita Lo used her teeth a lot.) We also finally get to see Doogie Howser (a.k.a.: Neil Patrick Harris) as a guest judge, along with Top Chef regular Gail Simmons, and a surprise visit from Tom Colicchio.

After much discussion and debate over the show and challenges presented, we asked ourselves this: Does Neil Patrick Harris’ love of magic make him less cool now?
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This week we discussed episode 2 of Top Chef Masters: The Lost Supper. Our special guest this week was Jeff Houck, food writer for The Tampa Tribune, who added a great dose of humor to the show and kept us in stitches.
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If you have been paying attention to all of the ads and the commercials on Bravo, you’ll already know that the Top Chef series is back (and we’re hoping you’ve watched). This time, there’s a twist: 24 well-known, seasoned chefs go head-to-head and compete in challenges just like they’ve put the contestants from past seasons through, all to win money for their charity of choice.

Top Chef Masters is a bit different than the original show, though. Instead of sticking all 24 of the “masters” in an apartment and make them eat, sleep, booze, and live together, four of them at a time compete in an episode. I was thoroughly surprised when I saw this – they didn’t mention that in the previews, but I can understand why this was done. (Do you really think these chefs are going to give up the reins of their uber popular restaurants and two months of their lives just for a TV show? Though I would liked to have seen a Hosea-Leah hookup scenario between, say, Roy Yamaguchi and Cindy Pawlcyn.)
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