Daily Loaf

Sex toys used to be thought of as kinky, perverted, and taboo, but things have changed. When I first got married I thought I’d never need to masturbate or use a vibrator. This was in the mid 80’s when you couldn’t anonymously shop for sex toys online. Now it’s easier than ever to search for all kinds of sexual aids without having to brave a visit to a “Dirty Book Store.” If you’re new to the world of sex toys, here’s a top ten list of a few of my favorites.

10. Nipple Clamps: Read the rest of this entry »

Yarr, mateys! It be Talk like a pirate day, in case ye not be knowin’. To give ye some fun on this day o’ international piracy, LucasArts and Telltale Games be offerin’ up the first episode in their new restart of Tales of Monkey Island.

All you need to do to pick up your free copy of the game is to head on over to http://www.playlikeapirate.com, plug in your email address and a password (they mail an activation code to you, so don’t fake it – although do be sure to uncheck the “add me to your mailing list” option if you don’t want further emails) and enjoy some time adventuring on the high seas – for free!

Keep in mind, this is only good until midnight tonight (Saturday, September 19th) so don’t wait if you want a copy.

Remember 1989? Remember the disappointment? How exciting the mere prospect was, the idea that we’d get more of that magical, hilarious madness. Another two hours worth of memorable quotes – what would replace “When someone asks you if you’re a God, you say yes!” or “Listen; Do you smell something?”

But then we got Ghostbusters 2 in all it’s lifeless, tepid, walking Statue of Liberty forgettableness. Who would want another sequel after that mess? And how could we get it two decades after the fact? Of course you’ve guessed the answer – Ghostbusters: The Video Game, which really is the sequel I’ve been waiting for.

All the original busters are back, Murray, Aykroyd, Ramis, and Hudson playing digital, young versions of their now aged and expanded selves. Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis are even credited as writers of the game, and I can believe it. The story has the same sensibilities as the original movie, the same over the top mythology and paranormal gobbledygook, and I found it a lot more interesting and entertaining than the Ghostbusters 2 plot. Of course it’s spread out over 7 hours of game play, but that works fine. It’s the transition to digital actors and recorded voice overs that’s less satisfying.

More review and video after the jump: Read the rest of this entry »

Not content to rest on their hot-frying-pan-to-the-face laurels, Capcom has announced today that brains, blood, guts, and more are coming to the Xbox 360, PS3, and PC with an all-new sequel to their 2006 zombie-stomping favorite, Dead Rising with Dead Rising 2. Now it may just be because I’m reading through World War Z at the moment, but I await the slaughter of a new zombie horde with gleeful anticipation.

For those not familiar with the original Dead Rising, the government was meddling with genetics, thereby causing a rather nasty breakout of zombies. In the first game, the ending leaves some doubt as to whether or not the infestation has been contained. This time, the story is set several years after the Williamette shopping mall invasion, and sure enough – the zombies were not wiped out at the end. Set in an adult casino haven called Fortune Falls, players can expect “a host of new in-game objects that can all be used as deadly weapons to stave off the zombie assault” in Dead Rising 2 – and apparently a giant human sized light-up hamster ball to travel in.  Another interesting bit is that Keiji Inafune returns as the producer for DR2, although the game is being developed in partnership with Blue Castle Games from Canada this time around as opposed to an all in-house Capcom team.

Curious to see a taste of the braaaaaaains to come? Check behind the cut for the tasty Dead Rising 2 trailer.

Read the rest of this entry »

Amazon.com lurks on the Web, ever dreaming of conquest. Their latest gambit is to sell you inexpensive, casual games for your PC, and wouldn’t you know it, the first hit is free. I have to admit that Build-a-Lot, Jewel Quest II, and The Scruffs aren’t exactly the titles I’ve been waiting for with baited breath (that would be Street Fighter IV), but hey, free games.

Well, not for me, since I don’t have a computer that runs Windows, but for most of you out there, you can sample the casual gaming experience thrice over sans cash before you embark down the dark path of one-click downloads Read the rest of this entry »

10:15 Stay tuned as we live blog The Office. Just kidding. Goodnight, everybody!

10:12 After many years of snoozefests, we’ve had two great games in two years. This probably doesn’t top the Giants/Patriots, or does it?

10:10 Pittsburgh 27 – Arizona 23 – FINAL

Valiant comeback by Arizona, but in the end their defense could not hold.

10:08 Hail Mary, full of grace…

Omar Epps or Mike Tomlin. Can you tell the difference? Read the rest of this entry »

In one of my many never-to-be-realized daydreams, I start training really hard, hours a day, and become a parkour expert. I run around Southwest Florida rooftops, leaping from building roof to palm tree, doing flips and skipping up walls, defying gravity.

The truth is, I never quite make it to the running, let alone all the jumping and grabbing and sliding. This lack of follow-through on my part is of course why we have video games. And while running, jumping, and generally defying gravity in interesting ways have been a staple of great games since Super Mario Brothers, Mirror’s Edge is the first video game to focus entirely on the parkour (or free running) experience from a first person perspective. And if you love, or even just kind of like games, then it’s a game you have to play. But there are some caveats… Read the rest of this entry »

One of the more interesting trends in gaming these days is the rise of downloadable games for home consoles. While only a few have, so far, been really successful — like Geometry Wars and Castle Crashers — the ability for independent developers to make great, small-budget games and sell them directly to players through their consoles or online both expands the options for consumers and augurs what the future of gaming is likely to be: all download, all the time. And it really is the best way to buy a game – you download a demo and get to play the first level or so to see if you like it. Once it has you hooked, just a couple button presses and you’re out $10, but have a new game. If it sucks (and oh yes, some of them suck –- looking at you Interpol: The Trail Dr. Chaos) press those buttons in a different order and the pain is but a memory. A memory that is easily replaced by something good like, for instance, The Maw.

I totally fell for the marketing on this game. It was being pimped on the first screen of X-Box Live when I logged in, featuring a purple monster with a big mouth that reminded me of the classic board game from my youth, Awful Green Things From Outer Space. Read the rest of this entry »

Sooner Holley:  Here we are.  As I am beginning this first blog of what will be many this evening, I am filled with an anticipation that is both exhilarating and terrifying.  I have been watching the ESPN Game Day boys, and while I’m appalled at the way they seem to have written Oklahoma off already, I’m also encouraged. Oklahoma was the favorite against Boise St.  Oklahoma was the favorite against West Virginia.  Oklahoma knows what it means to be upset, and they know the power of a motivation that comes from having no one believe in you.  Florida is a tough and scary opponent – that is true without question.  But, I think this game may look a little different than many expect.  

At least I hope so.  Gator fans, I fully respect the power of your defense and the sheer mass of your quarterback, but you may not want to turn your nose up at the Oklahoma defense, nor should you believe that you will easily stop the Sooner offense.  

At last announcement, Vegas likes the Gators by 5.  That news is like putting on warm fuzzy slippers like I just did a few minutes ago.  (did I mention I have a mini-plague which I believe to be the flu?)  That lack of faith is actually comforting.  

Both Lou Holtz and Mark Mays just picked Florida because of Tim Tebow, and Mark Mays just spouted some ridiculous garbage about Bob Stoops being an inadequate coach in bowl situations.

Keep talking boys….

8:04 pm Sooner Holley:  We’re now minutes from kick-off, and so far, I’ve seen one media member pick Oklahoma, and it was Barry Switzer.  I suppose we’ll just see what happens.  This game is going to be decided on the gridiron, not in the press box, and that’s the way it should be.

I’m looking for score predictions.  Gimme whatever you got, even if you’re predicting a Gator blow-out.  I’m curious.

8:27 Sooner Holley:  Okay, one drive down, and the blitz backed the Sooners up and out of scoring range.  It should be noted, however, that the two plays previous, the blitz was blocked effectively, and I’m pretty sure there was a pass interference call that was missed.  Blatantly.

However, the Sooners will persevere.  Let’s see now what happens with the Gators offense.  Is Tim Tebow all he’s been made out to be?  

8:48 Sooner Holley:  Well, it’s as I predicted.  Oklahoma is keeping it in the air, and doing well with it.  Too bad they are making petty mistakes, and also being jobbed by ACC refs.  Even Florida fans can relate to the misery of ACC refs.  I can remember a UF/FSU game just a few years back when the game’s outcome came down to some pretty terrible calls.  Throwing a flag for nothing with no explanation is nothing if not a maneuver to break the momentum of a driving team.

Roughly 4:40 left in the 1st quarter, and we’re still scoreless.  Both teams.

9:07 Sooner Holley: 7-0 Gators, and the commentary color guy would give the trophy to the Gators right now if he could.  Second quarter.  13:34 to the half.  Drive, OU, drive!

9:12 Sooner Holley:  Sorry color commentary guy…can’t give that trophy away just yet.  This is the speed of football that Oklahoma plays well.  Quick to the line, quick execution.  The Gators executed their scoring drive in true Gator style as well – do what it takes to make it happen.  Pound the rock.  Both teams are now playing their own styles of football.  This game starts now.

9:47 Sooner Holley:  It’s half time, and I don’t think ANYONE could have predicted this game.  Oklahoma’s total offense as compared to the score is going to look ridiculous at the end of this game.  We’ve had an interception leading to a 4th and goal gamble and a good old fashioned drive foiled by a receiver who clearly doesn’t know that if you can’t catch it KNOCK IT DOWN!  The Gators have played strange defense, but clearly it’s been effective.  Oklahoma’s offense looks stellar.  Florida did what they needed to in order to put points on the board.  It was messy, but a touchdown is a touchdown.  

I’m not sure what either locker room conversation will be like.  I have no idea what either coach will say to his players.  Personally, I’m a little dumbfounded, but I will say this.  I don’t want to hear anyone say anything again about Oklahoma having an inferior defense.  I think their defense has actually looked better than Florida’s so far, except as it pertains to the goal line, I guess.

All that said, I’m now going to go and have a spot of tea to soothe my throat whose terrible pain has been exacerbated by the frequency of my verbal outbursts.  I’m not sure what Gator Matty is up to right now, but I bet he is as baffled as I am.

10:20 Sooner Holley:  These are the two best teams in the country.  It’s pretty clear now, isn’t it?  There are so many penalties in this game, and so many of them seem unjustified.  I could yell, but my throat says, “please don’t!”  A drive a piece down and nothing really happening.

You know, now that I’m on the other side of the stadium, those “Gator Bait” signs are pretty darn annoying. I’ll admit, I’ve chanted that on behalf of my husband’s team plenty of times, but now I’m kind of sorry.  Plus, it’s just two nouns strung together with no verb.  It’s not “You are Gator Bait” or “We want to eat some Gator Bait” or “Run you stupid Gator Bait”.  It’s just “Gator Bait”…period.  Plus, if you don’t know what’s being said, and you hear it you could totally mistake that chant for any number of similar sounding words.  ”Gator Wait”…”Gator Hate”…”Wait, my mate!”  Granted, those are pretty ridiculous too, but…well…you get the idea.  

Gators are driving.  Ugh.

10:59 Sooner Holley: 4th quarter, Sooners driving, 14-7 Gators.  It occurred to me that if it weren’t for certain bad calls (or lack there of) and some dumb mistakes, the Sooners would be leading by 14 by now, even with the most recent Gator touchdown.  

11:15 Sooner Holley:  Gators up now 17-14 in the 4th.  Percy Harvin appeared to have been injured but was back in the game a play later, so it looks like he’s okay.  Sooners will get the ball now.  

11:33 Sooner Holley: 2:09 left in the game, 24-14 Gators  My faith is starting to waiver.  I don’t think my Sooners can pull out a win.  I believe in them, but I am afraid their confidence might be down.  I will say this, thanks to the overt bias of the commentary team in this game, I will, regardless of any agreements made between the Sinns, never ever declare Tim Tebow the best quarterback in the country.  Never.  It’s not his fault – the fault belongs to the people who have elevated him to god-like status.  He’s a kid like any other who has been afforded some incredible opportunities to be able to travel to other countries with his missionary family.  He has done some really wonderful things, but it isn’t fair to turn a blind eye to the life accomplishments of other more understated players simply because they are not as outspoken.  This game may well be over, and I hope you will all forgive me if I retire from this blog a little early.  I’m afraid, with my adrenaline spent, my flu has really started to overtake me, much like the Gators have overtaken my Sooners to this point.  

This game was personal for me, but tomorrow, I’ll have to get out of bed and remind myself of one very important fact:  it’s just a game.

Goodnight, and might I say once more:  ”I’m Sooner born, and Sooner bred, and when I die, I’ll be Sooner dead.  Rah Oklahoma, Rah Oklahoma, Rah Oklahoma…O-K-U!” 

Gator Matty and Sooner Holley

Sooner Holley:  In addition to the constant ribbing I’m getting lately about how “Tebow is Superman – just admit it” and how I better start mining for kryptonite, there’s a more personal Holley-criticism which is coming to me more and more frequently: Apparently, I lack objectivity.  By not admitting that Tim Tebow may as well be Zeus and Apollo combined because he has faced more top 50 defenses than Sammy B. and the Sooner offense, I am failing to recognize some legitimate facts and therefore, am not an objective fan.

Objective….Fan….Objective….Fan….there’s something that doesn’t feel right about that pairing of words.

Oh, it’s that they are completely contradictory.

If you are a “fan”, you have a bias.  That is the definition of the word.  You support a particular team, group, cause, ice cream flavor, grocery store, yada yada yada.  Objectivity doesn’t really have a place in “fandom” or “fannery” or “fanaticism”.  (I think that last one is the correct noun, but honestly, I like “fannery” the best.  It has a nice ring, doesn’t it?)

Example: Read the rest of this entry »

Great new game based on this week’s most watched YouTube video. Play it here.

(h/t to Gina Vivinetto)

Sooner Holley: About halfway through regular season play, my husband and I started talking about college football armageddon: The Florida Gators made an incredible turnaround after Tim Tebow’s moving speech following the Ole Miss game, and the Oklahoma Sooners started racking up touchdown after touchdown against every opponent following the Texas game.  Could it be possible that our two teams might meet in the BCS National Championship Game?

When conference championship weekend came to an end, we looked at each other and with a single glance; the battle line was drawn.  Not only would our teams, who had never in history met on the gridiron, see each other in a BCS match-up, it would be for the National Title.  Ever since, I have been inundated with Tebow propaganda… Read the rest of this entry »

No matter who wins the election today, you’ll need a little hooch to either jump start the celebration or provide a little solace. Considering the long hours of repetitive forecasting and multiple punditry, it’s best to go ahead and integrate serious drinking right at the beginning of your election night experience. And what better way than an election night drinking game.

Below, you’ll find links to a few complex contests of electoral imbibing, but I’d recommend those mostly for McCain supporters who’d rather devalue the experience into a mere tally of catchphrases and keywords. For anyone who actually wants to pay attention to the results, try out CL’s Election Night Drinking Game.

The rules are easy to follow, even for Palin supporters:
When your candidate wins a state — drink.
When your candidate loses a state — drink twice.

For electoral college wonks, just change “state” to “ten electoral votes”. That makes staying up for California extra fun.

How much you drink is up to you and your height/weight ratio. Plan for the long haul and consume accordingly. And remember, we can’t all be Wade Tatangelo.

It’s a simple game. The losers quickly fade into blissful oblivion, while the winners gain the happy glow of the truly satisfied.

If simple’s not your bag, check out these other options:

San Francisco Chronicle

The Modern Gal

The Gauntlet

Metromix South Florida

Sun-Sentinel