Daily Loaf

“I once dated a guy who brushed his teeth in between giving me oral and us having sex,“ she told me. As a sex and love writer extraordinaire it has become natural for my female gal pals to come to me with their sexual frustrations. I appreciate that, though it does annoy me how little effort my gender puts into pleasing their ladies. Don’t get me wrong, it makes me look like a better lover but hey, I’m am still here to help. Gentlemen, behold the Rabid One’s guide to pleasing your lady.

Whether it’s making love or “lets hope we forget this in the morning sex” men are going to crave getting off. Shock of shocks, I know. Well his dance partner does as well. Boys you need to learn about patience and knowledge.
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For more news and reviews of the summer’s biggest movies, go to the CL Movies & Television site.

In what is shaping up to be the first big upset at the summer movie box office, the R-rated comedy The Hangover is currently in first place for the weekend, besting Disney’s strong, kid-friendly Up and the Will Ferrell comedy Land of the Lost. This according to Nikki Finke’s Deadline Hollywood:

Some of the fun of summer box office reporting is that, every now and then, a sleeper comes out of nowhere and captures the No. 1 film crown during a weekend. “I guess there’s no reason to do this if sometimes crazy things don’t happen,” marveled one rival studio exec last night. Because early domestic box office numbers from Friday show that Warner Bros’ well reviewed Bachelor Party-gone-wrong comedy The Hangover opened for at least $16.5M from 3,269 theaters for probably close to a $50M weekend. That’s without stars, too. Instead, credit a hot R-rated high concept (directed by Old School helmer Todd Phillips) and marketing plan.

Moe surprising is that Land of the Lost looks to be a bomb, on pace for $20 million against a reported cost of $100 million. This puts added pressure on Ferrell’s August 14 release, The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard. If that one tanks too, there will be grumbling that the comedian has lost his appeal.

For more on Land of the Lost, check out our Reel Projections Podcast or my Land of the Lost review.

[Ed. note: Each week I'll be breaking down the big summer blockbuster movie releases. If you're curious about what's coming out in future weeks, be sure to check out the Summer Movie Preview. For more info on this week's releases, please check out our full length reviews of Land of the Lost, The Hangover and Every Little Step. And for all things film, please visit our movie site.]

FRIDAY, JUNE 5TH
Box office Gold: Land of the Lost
Worth seeing? Only if you’re a big Will Ferrell fan, or if you fondly remember catching episodes of the early ’70s TV version of Land of the Lost produced by puppet-masters Sid and Marty Krofft. The show was ambitious in scope but low in budget, while the big-screen edition sports star power (Ferrell, up-and-comer Danny McBride), an experienced director (Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events’ Brad Silberling) and mountains of pricy CGI. Despite the glossy exterior, the most endearing elements of the TV show — rampaging dinosaurs, monkey people, the alien-looking Sleestaks, even the white-water rafting intro — have made it into the movie. With much of the draw of the 1970s TV show wrapped up in its no-budget production values, it’ll be interesting to see if this high-tech reboot manages to retain the charm of the original.
Counter-programming: If Land of the Lost is a little too goofy or kid-targeted for your sensibilities, there’s also Nia Vardalos, Richard Dreyfuss and Rachel Dratch in the set-in-Greece romantic comedy My Life in Ruins. If that’s not bangin’ your baklava, perhaps you’ll like The Hangover, the latest from Road Trip director Todd Philips about three guys retracing their steps after a Vegas bachelor party gone wrong ends with the groom M.I.A. And there’s always Every Little Step at the Tampa Theatre. Step is like crack for theater geeks, but it’s also a damn fine movie for anyone who’s ever dreamed of something better for themselves.

Previews after the break.

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For more news and reviews of all the summer blockbusters, go to CL’s Movies & Television site.

Reel-Projections-Episode-7_6-3-09.mp3

Mike J. Nelson

The Reel Projections podcast returns with an interview with Mike Nelson. Fans of bad movies or great TV shows remember Nelson as the former head-writer and star of the Comedy Central/Sci-Fi Channel hit Mystery Science Theater 3000. Nelson is still busy trashing flicks with Rifftrax, a provider of audio commentary tracks for movies both old and new. Joined by MST3K vets Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett (among others), Rifftrax is for anyone who ever dreamed of seeing the MST3K crew take on current releases. (I’ve included some YouTube Rifftrax’s clips for The Dark Knight, Jaws, Star Wars and a few others after the break below.) You can also find Rifftrax online, and some of the programs have been released as DVD’s now for sale. All come highly recommended.

Speaking of bad movies, this Reel Projections podcast is also loaded with details on the new Will Ferrell comedy Land of the Lost. Host Joe, Joran and Producer Stephen have all seen the movie, and they break it down on the podcast. A word of warning: MAJOR SPOILERS ahead, so if you plan to see the movie, read Joe Bardi’s non-spoiler review of Land of The Lost now and listen to the podcast after you’ve seen the movie.

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For more news and reviews of the summer’s biggest movies, go to the CL Movies & Television site.

The summer movie season is never one for originality, as Hollywood puts forth mostly known properties with built-in fan interest. This summer has already seen re-boots of X-Men and Star Trek, a fourth Terminator sequel and a second shot of Night at the Museum — and that’s just May. In the weeks to come, expect sequels (Transformers, Harry Potter, Halloween, etc.), remakes (Taking of Pelham 123), and even more re-boots.

Which brings me to Land of the Lost. Originally created by puppet-masters Sid & Marty Krofft back in their 1970s heyday, Land of the Lost (L.O.T.L.) followed the adventures of dimension-hopping scientist Rick Marshall and his two kids, Will and Holly. While on a camping trip, the trio was swept over a waterfall and through a dimensional portal to a strange new world, parallel to earth but containing artifacts of the planet’s past and future. Will and the kids were chased by dinosaurs, befriended by a weird monkey-thing named Cha-Ka and had dealings with lizard men known as Sleestaks, all in an attempt to find their way home. Sadly, cast shake-ups and cancellation came first.

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