Daily Loaf

Lookin' good at midnight.

It wasn’t until my sophomore year of high school that I met my first, honest-to-God(dess?), self-declared feminist.

Now, by no means had I lived a particularly sheltered life. I grew up with Showtime and HBO. My step-dad did (and does) tattoos for a living, so a man named Pig used to babysit me. (When Greasy Jack was busy.) My mom was a hippie, and one day I’ll actually tell my children that she backpacked from Ohio to California. And my dad’s favorite joke was yelling, “Hey! Emersom!” at Baywatch (ah, ’90s) or any woman at Toys R Us.  He never remarried.

(If you’re unfamiliar with emersom, e-mail me and I’ll fill you in. I don’t know if you’re old enough.)

So, sheltered I was not. Still, feminists were not a part of my life — unless you count Pig’s Ol’ Lady, who may have burned a bra had she ever worn one.

But back to my sophomore year. Like most young lads of 16 or 17, I was often found discussing The Little Mermaid. More specifically, whether or not it was a better movie than Beauty and the Beast — which it is, slightly, but that’s another story entirely.

My journalism teacher, later mentor, nemesis and friend (of sorts), informed me that the movie was horrible.

Ariel? The Little Mermaid? My mermaid, horrible? Read the rest of this entry »

When you think about Marvel Comics, chances are you think about Spider-Man. The Hulk. Captain America. Iron Man. The X-Men.

But there have been just as many X-Women as -Men.

More of Marvel’s characters have called themselves Spider-Woman than Spider-Man, including the figurehead of last summer’s mega-crossover Secret Invasion.

She-Hulk was Marvel Chairman Emeritus Stan Lee’s final Marvel creation. A simple origin, but a lasting character.

Even so, Jennifer Walters — the cousin of Bruce Banner, The Hulk, has yet to smash her way to the big screen, in either an Ang Lee-adapted mess or much-deserved, subsequent relaunch several years later. And the only Spider-Woman your average person may recognize is a fat kid dressed as Spider-Man for Halloween. (I’m allowed to say that. It was me. They weren’t boobs, they were buds.)

Wolverine became the first X-Men spin-off, beating Phoenix, Rogue or Storm. (Sorry, Halle.) And the only Marvel film with a female at the lead, Elektra, managed to do worse than its predecessor, Daredevil.

Why? Because comic books, and therefore their mainstream adaptations, tend to lend themselves more to the Y chromosome than the X.

But X has always been a key component to the success of Marvel Comics — and in March, coinciding with National Women’s History Month, the company will begin a year-long celebration of the women both on and behind its pages with Marvel Women. Read the rest of this entry »

At some point in your life, in one way or another, you’ve come across a comic book.

You read them when you were younger; you made fun of someone for reading them when you were younger. (Or last week.) You saw Spider-Man 3 on its opening weekend; someone gave you their copy of Spider-Man 3 for your birthday.

You decided to pass on playing Wolverine in the first X-Men movie; you’re a household name because you played Wolverine in the first X-Men movie, the second, the third and eventually your own spin-off. (Or maybe that’s only if you’re Dougray Scott – hope Mission Impossible II was worth it. Hugh Jackman thought so.)

You watched Batman with bated breath; you watched Batman and Robin with a weak gag reflex.

Maybe you dated someone who read them, bought one as a gag gift, passed that guy with the unfortunate haircut looking at them at Borders, or just liked Batman: The Animated Series.

Or you just can’t log on to read your Daily Loaf without some guy tricking you into reading about them with pictures of Ryan Reynolds’ abs or Jennifer Aniston.

Whatever the case, comics are a part of your life — and it’s time for you to come to terms with the Top 10 reasons you should read comic books:

10. EVERYONE SHOULD
KNOW HEROES IS A RIP-OFF

It’s been said that there are no more original ideas. That everything’s been done. Now, I’m certainly not suggesting that Marvel Comics — or DC — invented the idea of the superhero. The ideology surrounding them existed before Joan Rivers was in diapers. But in terms of modern pop culture, well, Marvel and DC practically did invent the superhero. They certainly made them relevant.

If you’re going to do something that’s been done, do it better. Google Days of Future Past or watch an X-Men movie: Hugh Jackman and Hayden Panettiere, Wolverine and Claire, respectively, share more in common than an eight-head.

I’m not saying Heroes is a bad show. It isn’t. I’ve seen it, though like much of America, I’m not watching it now.  Humans discovering they have superhuman abilities, dealing with a government that hates and fears them, all while trying to save the world — it’s a great concept. Potential cures, racing through time and dealing with horrible futures — it’s compelling. When it’s called X-Men.

On a side note, NBC: The Incredibles did the same thing… but it was incredible. And Disney bought Marvel, so watch out.  Read the rest of this entry »

Video games allow us to simulate amazing feats and experience what it’s like to possess superhuman abilities, or to put it another way – to act like superheroes. Even games like Halo or Call of Duty owe as much to the super-heroic experience as they do to modern warfare. In real life, you can’t just shrug off a burst a machine gun fire by hiding behind a rock for five seconds. That’s a bona fide, Wolverine-style super power. It’s off then that there have been so many bad superhero games over the years. But we’re in a new golden age of such games, and if you read my Batman: Arkham Asylum review then you know it’s possible to make a superhero game that perfectly captures that comic book experience. Batman focused all its efforts on simulating one particular hero. The new Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 takes the opposite approach, offering a whole comic book universe of heroes to choose from in an attempt to recreate the world of Marvel Comics in one giant epic tale.

Ultimate Alliance’s story is drawn straight from two recent cross-over events in Marvel Comics – the Secret War and The Civil War. The Civil War in particular strove to achieve some really interesting political and social relevance with the legal and moral issues facing superheroes mirroring real world debates about freedom vs. security in the age of terror. With Marvel’s heroes split into two camps – Pro-Government led by Iron-Man and Pro-Freedom led by Captain America – the high drama of brother against brother that only comes from a civil war played out in dark, dramatic fashion across the pages of dozens of different comic book titles. This game offers a pretty close (but not by any means exact) version of that story, leaving it to the players as to which side they will support. And of course since it’s a video game, you can always go back and play it again from the other side. Read the rest of this entry »

Marvel Comics has always been known for its human touch – for its focus on continuity before capes. Spider-Man wasn’t born of Krypton, but Queens: your average boy next door. The Fantastic Four were fantastic, yes, but a family first. Before getting his act together, Tony Stark, Iron Man, drank more than my dad on a Monday. They’re human.

It’s that touch that has drawn readers (and conglomerates) to their pages for 70 years. Man before Super, Woman before Wonder.

In 1963, the X-Men blasted, flew, bounced and ice-slid into the comics world as character first – but also social commentary.

Before this, superheroes were always different – “special” – but with few exceptions, praised for it. Any minority could enjoy them next to the majority, perhaps identifying with their differences: but what about their acceptance? Could they identify with that?

Spider-Man was often looked down upon by the city he protected, but his powers were the result of circumstance. Bruce Wayne was feared for his differences – but he had elected to become Batman. (Not to mention that, by day, he was a millionaire. Tough life.)

But the X-Men – that was it. That was the key. It wasn’t choice that made them who they’d become. It wasn’t circumstance that had made them different.

It was birth. Read the rest of this entry »

*The Duggars are expecting their 19th child. If you do not know who they are, I want you to imagine Jon and Kate + 8 - The Douche + 11 x a whole lot of morals and a stance against birth control. Got it?  Good. In all seriousness, though, that woman’s uterus should be removed and ceremoniously burned. No one should have that many kids, not Albert Einstein, not Stephen Hawking, not Mother Teresa and most definitely not anyone named Jim Bob.**

*Disney acquired Marvel comics this week.  In a related story, Spiderman will now don a pair of 4-fingered white gloves.

*One of the best and most totally realistic medical dramas of all time is returning this fall and apparently Christina and Dr. McArmy (aka Owen) are going to work things out. Am I the only one who ISN’T stoked for this pairing?! If we have learned anything from this show, and we have learned a lot, it is that people who fall in love with main characters go crazy, die or get removed from the cast for being homophobic. Christina cannot handle that type of heartache and frankly, neither can I.

Read the rest of this entry »

The number of male celebrities who’ve portrayed comic book characters on film is impressive, but the list of actresses to translate the women of comics for the big screen definitely, well, racks up.

Halle Berry brought a loosely adapted Catwoman to the silver screen, though more acclaimed was her version of element- and director-controlling Storm in the three X-Men films. (Incidentally, I hear Bryan Singer still cries himself to sleep after years of receiving threatening letters from her Oscar.)

Famke Janssen fired up the screen as Jean Grey in the same amount of films, coupled with the likes of hotter-than-ever Anna Paquin and Rebecca Romjin as Rogue and Mystique, respectively.

Michelle Pfeiffer’s take on Catwoman in Batman Returns is as timeless as she is, Angelina Jolie was Wanted, and Gwyneth Paltrow Peppered up Iron Man as a comic character with the ultimate weapon: heart.

Iron Man 2 will see Scarlet Johansson as spy extraordinare Black Widow, Natalie Portman has joined the ranks of Thor, and outspoken comics fan Megan Fox is rumored to have signed on to play a different comic heroine every day. One thing is certain: the list of beautiful actresses to portray comicdom’s hottest women will continue to expand faster than Kirstie Alley’s waistline.

You’ve seen the men, so without further ado — take a look at mainstream comics Top 10 Hottest Women: Read the rest of this entry »

Ryan Reynolds has signed on to play Green Lantern for DC’s upcoming live-action adaptation of the same name — and while he may play the same character in every film, so do his abs. Wolverine has been played in four separate films by Hugh Jackman and his pecs.

Before Christan Bale’s mouth was crippling franchises like Terminator, he saved another with Batman Begins. Ex-model James Marsden played X-Man Cyclops.

Robert Downey, Jr. regained heartthrob status as Iron Man, Tobey Maguire showed what a gym could do with Spider-Man, and Nicholas Cage played Ghost Rider.

(Okay, ignore that last part.)

The point is: there’s a reason actors like Danny DeVito play the supervillain. Sex sells. In any genre and in any medium.  Just look at our Most Popular blogs. (You probably already did.)

I would like to point out that I don’t think any of the following characters are real. I don’t think I could date them and I don’t think they’re better looking than any real human being, except for Nicholas Cage.

But, if only for art’s sake, take a look at mainstream comic book’s Top 10 Hottest Men: Read the rest of this entry »

If Brad Pitt hadn’t left Jennifer Aniston for Angelina Jolie, it’s highly unlikely the two actresses would ever be compared. But he did — and so, they are.

I find them both very beautiful. I think they’re both amazing actresses. But there’s an obvious difference, nose jobs aside: they’re two different types of entertainers. One will always primarily be known for her work in television, the other in film.

Yes, Aniston’s career has included film — although let’s be honest: for every Marley & Me, there’s a Leprechaun. But we didn’t see Jolie play the same character for ten years.

While she may not have an Oscar, there’s a lot to be said about an actress who can keep a character interesting for a decade. The actors and actresses in television, in my opinion, are much harder workers than those in film — and that’s why Jennifer Aniston is a lot like a comic book.

Read the rest of this entry »

Shatterstar, Rictor and their ambiguous relationship always had a cult following, seen here in Marvel's 1999 X-Force Annual. Property of Marvel Comics.

I’m listening to RuPaul’s new CD. RuPaul, the famous drag queen. It’s circumstantial, to be honest. I like dance music; I like pop. It’s music that doesn’t require much thought, which can be nice for an over-thinker.

I’m not listening to RuPaul because I’m gay. I’m not listening to RuPaul because she’s gay. That being said, it is refreshing to hear a genre of music I enjoy that reflects a part of myself.

Note: I am not a drag queen.

It got me thinking. (I did say I was an over-thinker.) Not about the bass in my walk — but rather about another of my passions.

Before I am a music lover, before I am a gay man, I am a comic addict. I’m not talking about Adam Sandler, or whoever the kids think is funny these days. I’m talking about comic books. Twenty-two-page, released every Wednesday, coming-soon-to-a-big-screen-near-you bliss.

I decided I wanted to write for Marvel Comics sometime in the womb, and I was introduced to the world of comic lore around 1991. The comic I started collecting was X-Men Unlimited #6, about a mutant-turned-pterodactyl attacking some of my favorite X-Men. Every panel was bliss, artwork and the written word joining together to entertain and induce addiction.

But I digress. This actually does relate to RuPaul, though indirectly. I’ve never lobbied for gay characters in Marvel’s pages. To place them for some twisted version of affirmative action (like the character of Northstar in Uncanny X-Men) would be foul play and distasteful.

Read the rest of this entry »