On many occasions I can be caught mumbling, “Man, I wish I was a guy.” This is accurate on most accounts. It sucks bleeding every month for days on end. Having a kid come out of your lower body looks pretty shitty. And, general upkeep is far more annoying.
But, when it comes to sex, I am MORE than happy to be a female. Read the rest of this entry »
I love children, so long as they’re not screaming at a restaurant, shoving food on the floor, puking Gerber on my shoulder, interrupting my sleep, filling their diapers with green shit, or spoiling my social plans with emergency hospital visits. Maybe I only love other peoples’ kids, particularly my brother’s son who will carry on the proud family name by being extraordinarily average.
I may have kids one day, but not so long as I’m married to a biologist who believes overpopulation is at the root of all environmental problems. Living in the continuous strip mall that is Pinellas County, it’s hard to avoid the squeeze of overpopulation encroaching on every side not unlike the legions of change-hungry meth-addicts who swarm the moment I step outside. Who hasn’t felt the urge to lessen the overpopulation problem by veering off the road to clip a beached-whale of a tourist waddling across the street followed by a soccer team of unruly chubsters? And maybe it’s just me, but why the hell does the government not offer tax breaks to couples without children instead of breeders?
A new book, No Kids: 40 Good Reasons Not to Have Children, by Corinne Maier agrees with me. Read the rest of this entry »
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