Daily Loaf

Swingers are very superficial people.  This statement will probably have some swingers coming out swinging, but in all honesty you are shopping for a sex partner based on looks.  Attractiveness is very important to swingers.  If you’re average looking you might label yourself as ‘NOT Ken and Barbie’ in your online profile, but this doesn’t mean you want someone who looks like a monster. Looks win out.  Attractive people attract other good looking people.  This doesn’t mean that only the attractive find love, but the good looking garner more glances and gawks; thus potentially leading to meeting more mates.

Getting the attention of other people based on beauty isn’t limited to just sex and love. Some are able to get ahead in the job market, professional sports, and of course blogging purely because they are attractive. Science seems to agree with this. According to Science in Society, good looking people are more likely to win sporting events. Science News states that physical attraction also impacts income positively. Read the rest of this entry »

I’m still amazed when I hear about someone getting married because of faith and not love.  That fact that people are still marrying out of necessity to their religion is astonishing. Take Alex for instance.  I don’t personally know Alex, but he is a friend of a friend.  Recently his story reminded me how some people still hide who they are in order to be accepted by church or family.  Alex is gay, yet he lives the life of a straight man to his friends, family, church, and even his fiance. Read the rest of this entry »

I first introduced my friend Julia in Sugar daddy wanted:  part 1, as a beautiful, 30-something with long black hair, large breasts, and a thin frame–-a woman who should never have a problem finding a date, yet she does.

Julia decided to try her luck on seekingarrangment.com, and quickly began sending and receiving messages.  The emails mainly consisted of questions such as, what are your interests and what are you looking for?  Some men wanted to know about kinky things like anal sex or S&M. Others said they were interested in friendship.  Still others were more concerned with what kind of arrangement Julia wanted. Some questions were quite extreme, but not harmful, while others made her click the delete button as fast as possible.  Luckily Juila found a few profiles that caught her attention. Read the rest of this entry »

Everyone has a secret.  Some may be juicy while others may be plain Jane, but simply put, everyone has something that no one else knows.

If you are reading my blogs you know a few of my secrets.   I blog mainly about my open marriage, my body, and my sex life. This isn’t really a secret to you, but the general population (i.e. most people close to me have no clue I do this).  It’s a big secret to me and I absolutely love having it. Read the rest of this entry »

Internet dating has fast become a popular way to meet people. There are sites for every type of relationship: singles, couples, swingers, cheaters, gay, lesbian, bisexual, and friends. However, the universe of the internet continues to expand, delving into ever more specific niches. Here are some samples of the hyper specific dating sites I’ve come across.

My favorite site so far is Cougarlife.  I’m not quite a cougar (I’m 37), but I do fancy a younger 20-something man, and would be happy to join this site!

For those who have a very particular fetish, you may find a potential partner in Extreme Restraints Dating, where members are encouraged to explore their hidden fantasies.  I poked around this site (its free!) and discovered there are some real hotties with fetishes I’ve never even imagined! Read the rest of this entry »

All swingers have their own rules. Rules are what make swinging doable (pun intended).  Soccer Dad and I have gone somewhat past the basic swinger lifestyle and have dabbled a bit in an open marriage.  You might wonder how this is different.  We are having sex with others, isn’t that open?  It’s actually not.  Typically swingers share their experiences together.  That might mean sharing one bed with another couple and swapping, or having drinks and dinner with a couple and then following up with sex in the same room.  Sometimes couples, myself included, venture to separate rooms for sex. So, where do solo events fit into these scenarios? Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Stalkers:

Since I started writing this blog, I‘ve come to accept that some of you out there in internet-land aren’t entirely normal.  You seem to think that because I write about my sexual encounters with new acquaintances at swingers parties that I will be wooed by your sexual requests via Facebook as a kind of gratitude for friending me or reading my blogs.  While relentless persistence may be a virtue in ebay bid wars, or role playing games, it does little to impress women online. My silence in response to your creepy requests is not because my computer crashed, or your message did not go through. My lack of a response doesn’t mean I am waiting for you to ask me ten more times to send me single sentences messages, requesting nude photos of me. Even when I directly say NO, still you persevere. If only you applied the same kind of will power to self improvement, you wouldn’t have to stalk people online to simulate real life sexual encounters. Read the rest of this entry »

Former Tampa resident Tom Kelly details his journey into the swinger world as a single male in Would you like to sleep with my wife. Kelly’s adventure begins after leaving an unhappy relationship with a  fanatic girlfriend in attempt to quell his desire to be constantly surrounded by naked women.  This ultimately leads him to a management position at a nudist resort frequented by swingers. Kelly finds himself both admiring the natural beauty of women and discovering a new lease on a taboo lifestyle.  Guests find Kelly’s helpful nature and outgoing personality to be more of a sign of suggestive behavior than typical customer service. This leads him to receive propositions of sex and the opportunity of new sexual exploration. Read the rest of this entry »

I am what many may call a protection queen.  If you want to put your man parts into my girl parts you better be covered.  It’s a very simple rule–no sex without a condom.  There are many reasons I feel this way – I don’t want an STD, I don’t want to get pregnant, and I like my vagina as it is:  pretty, smooth, and pink.

Not all swingers live by this rule. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve been in a few bedrooms over the years and I’m always amazed by the sounds that come out of overly excited sex partners, either with me or in the bed next to me.  Everyone responds differently to sex, orgasm, and excitement, but  how much of that noise is genuine and how much is put on for show?

I am not an overly noisy person during sex.  I don’t really talk loudly about the dirty deeds I want you to do to me.  You could say I am more of a sexual whisperer.  If you were having sex with me you might experience my hot breath in your ear, whispering whatever comes to mind in my sexiest voice.  Although, sometimes I find myself being  just silly in bed and clowning around during sex.  Unfortunately this might be at your expense — sorry.  But, if you’re lucky enough to hear me raise my voice a bit, grind out a few words in a deep tone, you are probably hurting me, and well, at the moment it might be a good thing. Read the rest of this entry »

I guess you could call Soccer Dad and I seasoned swingers, as we’ve been involved in the lifestyle for more than eight years. But, even with this vast amount of experience I still don’t always know what swingers are looking for. Online swinger profiles offer some insight into understanding what swingers want, as well as illuminate some of the confusion involved in trying to make connections within the swinging scene. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve had many emails asking how to successfully approach other swingers.  The answer isn’t the same for everyone.  Approaching a stranger for sex is awkward at best, let alone  incredibly intimidating.  What if they say no?  What if they don’t like you?  How do you know if they like you? Read the rest of this entry »

Living the swinger lifestyle offers the opportunity of having sex with many different strangers.  I don’t really know all of the people I have sex with, but normally I have talked and spent some time with them before engaging in any sexual play.  But, even with this excitement I still fantasize about riskier sex scenarios.

In the dressing room/closet: I have always wanted to have sex in a department store dressing room or a random storage closet with a total stranger.  The thought of meeting a beautiful stranger and having erotic sex after locking eyes gets me hot and bothered.  This must be a fantasy many of you have too. Read the rest of this entry »

As I float around my pool today, naked of course, I fantasize about things I’d like to do naked.  Some of these things may be risky and others just goofy, but all fun.

Besides jumping in the pool naked, I’ve walked around a private club naked, attended a swingers party naked, and I’ve actually danced on a stripper pole a time or two naked. But I still fantasize about a few other things i could do in my birthday suit. Read the rest of this entry »

As I was driving to work Monday, Fisher and Boy from the 97X morning show played a creepy voicemail from a dude attempting to get a date.  The bit was about a woman who was approached by a  guy who asked her out. She wasn’t interested and was only able to get rid of him by giving him her business card.  Probably a dumb move, but I sympathize. The guy called her two times leaving two very long, creepy messages.  Some men just can’t imagine why any female wouldn’t want to date or sleep with them. This made me consider all the creepy ways men have tried to weasel their way into my life, or at least my vagina. Read the rest of this entry »

Who has sex with strangers?  I think the answer is most of you. Whether you are a swinger, single person, or a perpetual cheater, it’s likely you’ve had sex with someone you consider a stranger.  So why do so many people think the swinging lifestyle is so strange — we too have sex with strangers, but at least we’re honest about it. Read the rest of this entry »

Women have it easy.  They can get laid nearly effortlessly. Men on the other hand aren’t quite so lucky.  Even the male half of a swinging couple must put forth the effort to catch the eye of a pretty lady or the hot soccer mom at a party.  Vanillas (non swingers) may think that being a swinger at a swinger party pretty much guarantees sex, but the truth is it doesn’t.

The rule of thumb for both swinger men and vanilla men (I apologize if you  feel plain) is, keep your mind open and your hands to yourself.  This may seem contradictory to some, but if you’re open to talking just a little and not groping her soccer ball shaped ass, you’ll succeed more times than not.  Trust me. I’m a woman and I know these things.

Don’t talk yourself out of sex.  Read the rest of this entry »

I love to masturbate! Everyone masturbates, well, except for weirdos, old people, and those who haven’t tried it.  I’ll admit that I was in my late 20s before I discovered the beauty of self pleasure.  Since then I turned into a closet masturbator.  No, this doesn’t mean that I pretend that I don’t; it simply means I masturbate in the closet.   This may seem rather strange to you, but it makes perfect sense to me.  I get home a bit earlier than expected and the house is empty, but for how long is unknown.  I need some me time and I don’t want to get caught.  Thus, closet masturbation is born. Read the rest of this entry »

Soccer Dad and I are off to another swingers party this weekend filled with couples we know and many we don’t.  So how do we know a swinger’s party will be worth the trip and the price of admission if we have no idea if there will be anyone there we want to fuck? We don’t.

Vanilla couples may never completely understand swinging.  The lifestyle is based on looks, confidence, and sexual prowess.  You can be a perfectly nice person, and even attractive, but that doesn’t mean I want to have sex with you just because I arrive at a swinger’s party with a choker that reads, “I love cock.”  Swinger parties or clubs are similar to regular bars on Saturday nights: They’re meat markets, except for married folks. Read the rest of this entry »

Swingers aren’t as easy to spot as you may think. You may even be a swinger without realizing it. To eliminate any confusion, I’ve compiled a top ten list of reasons you might want to change your Facebook status from “married” to “swinger.”

You might be a swinger if: Read the rest of this entry »

Remember when you actually had to speak to a person face-to-face to attract a date? Well times have changed and so has the world of relationships. Social networking Web sites like our beloved Facebook have caused major rifts between couples. A study by the University of Guelph, involving more than 300 college students, found that Facebook causes jealousy among romantic partners. Much of this resulted from a partner being Facebook friends with his or her ex. Read the rest of this entry »

On several occasions I’ve been asked how many sex partners I’ve had. Having lived as a swinger for several years, I’ve probably had more than most, but the exact number is tricky. It depends on what you count as a sex partner. For me, I can only define what one is, by describing what a sex partner is not.

Oral sex only: Some swingers have rules, like soft swap only.  This means I only have oral sex with the other man then have actual sex with my husband. For me, oral sex doesn’t count as sex. Read the rest of this entry »

Let’s get one thing straight.  Every woman should be treated like a princess. Women need to be handled with care and respect. Speak to them honestly and avoid trying to be something you are not; we see right through that. Here are some simple pointers for men who are a bit lost when it comes to women–especially those men who don’t realize they’re lost.

The guys who don’t talk about their dicks, chicks, sexual achievements, or money are the ones who have it, do it, and can use it. Read the rest of this entry »

When jealousy rears its ugly head during sex, nothing good will come of it.  People enter the swinging lifestyle for different reasons.  Unfortunately some believe swinging will save their marriage.  Such a desperate move usually only promotes jealousy–a surefire relationship killer. Read the rest of this entry »

I just noticed that I have a bruise on my breast.  Does this mean the sex was really good or really bad? That all depends on what you like in bed. For me, my weekend sex, bruises and all, was pretty damn good.

Soccer Dad and I walked into the second bar of the night on our ‘date’ with a hot younger couple.

“You don’t have to liquor me up,” I said to my potential sex partner. “I’m a sure thing,”

Everyone laughed, but the fact remained that we were there to get comfortable with each other before having sex with virtual strangers. This is the basis of the swinging lifestyle after all. Read the rest of this entry »

It occurred to me recently that fuck buddies are high maintenance.  A fuck buddy can be someone you sleep with on occasion with no attachment, or it could be a couple you and your partner swap with now and again. I’ve met a few people who seem to fuck others purely for the psychological boost – they need to feel better about themselves. These are high maintenance fuck buddies. Read the rest of this entry »

The “Get Leid Party” Saturday night by Florida’s Finest Couples, was one to remember. I walked into a room full of grass skirts, bikini tops, and Hawaiian shirts. Brian, the website’s owner, was a spirited good looking guy who kept trying to announce my presence on one of the karaoke mic. I guess that means I’m finally a superstar! I declined his offers, worried that no one would want to fuck me knowing I’d critique our sex the next day. Read the rest of this entry »

Is your vagina cleanly shaved? Do you regularly go for the Brazilian wax? Maybe you trim your pubic hair regularly or let it grow wild like a little ecosystem around your penis. Whether you’re male or female, you must be aware of the pubic hair issue.

Porn stars and swingers aren’t the only people who need to manicure their privates. It still surprises me each time I go out on a swinging date and see the female with a Chia Pet of a vagina, or the male with so much hair you have to dig through it to find his cock.  Please tell me, is pubic hair really still popular or are these people just oblivious? Read the rest of this entry »

Not every marriage is open to multiple sexual partners like mine, but the overwhelming desire to fuck someone other than your spouse is as common as arguments over whose turn it is to take out the trash. The difference between cheaters and those stuck in 10+ year marriages with infrequent sex and constant nagging, is that cheaters act on these desires. The problem is that cheating doesn’t come natural for most of us. So, if you aren’t the stud fucking the office hottie in the bathroom, or the femme fatale hooking up with random douche bags you flash peace sign at on the highway, here are a few guidelines for dabbling in the dark art of extramarital affairs. Read the rest of this entry »

I’m a frequent reader of secret blog sites.  I love knowing what other people are hiding, the secrets dieing to be told, and professing my own secrets from time to time.  I came across a particular secret, or maybe better described as a desire on a site called cavecanum.  The author suggested that there should be a symbol for finding someone willing to engage in oral sex with a stranger, kind of like the handkerchief code for gay men. The writer of secret #80903 says Read the rest of this entry »

Vaginas are a beautiful thing. They’re soft, wet, warm, and inviting, and yet they come in as many models as there are cars on the road. Some even have a vagina preference. While many men like an outward protruding labia, others get off on vaginas totally concealed by the outer lips.

I was at a swingers party once where all the girls were standing around in their panties.  Most were wearing thongs or frilly panties, but one wore large cotton underwear.  I playfully teased her, asking, “Why are you wearing granny panties?”

“I’m an outie,” she said. “I have to protect my precious parts.”

(pic below the jump NSFW)

Read the rest of this entry »