Daily Loaf

Note: This is our first Tournament of Summer Movie Blockbuster. In case you missed it, here’s the skinny on the tourney and a full list of competing films. And for news and reviews of this summer’s blockbusters, be sure and check CL’s Movies & TV site.

In last week’s inaugural match-up, #1-ranked Jaws put the bite on #8 seed Beverly Hills Cop 2 and advanced to the second round. This week, I plan three matches (check back Wednesday and Friday for the other two), leading off with #1 ranked Star Wars vs. #8 seed Mission:Impossible II.

Voting and details on the films after the jump …

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Whiff of lav·en·der: n.

1.      A relationship or marriage that disguises one or both of the partners’ homosexuality.

Use: It is much easier to find a woman willing to have a whiff of lavender relationship if you have money or fame. Just look at Tom Cruise and John Travolta.

I had every intention of seeing Valkyrie at the Regal Park Place Stadium 16 last night, but the 7:50 show was sold out. Although Valkyrie has received middling reviews, I still want to see it, a desire I can attribute to three reasons:

1. Tom Cruise (so intense, so watchable,)

2. It was directed by Bryan Singer (X-Men, The Usual Suspects)

3. (And most important) The poster for Valkyrie has the balls to make Nazis look like the antihero studs of Reservoir Dogs.

Watchmen ruling: Now what? If you read Wednesday’s Reel Projections, you know that a federal judge ruled that Fox Studios owns the distribution rights to Watchmen, putting its March 6 release by Warner Bros. in serious jeopardy. Over at Slashfilm, Peter Sciretta offers a few scenarios that could play out between the two studios, ranging from a co-distribution deal to the film not being released at all.

Every Friday, Reel Projections welcomes the Cranky (Because He’s Soon to Be Unemployed) Copy Editor into the screening room to review one trailer for an upcoming film. Take it away, CCE: Read the rest of this entry »

We are currently in the midst of a severe celebrity slump.

Real, honest-to-goodness headline-grabbing celebs are no where to be found. Instead, we’ve been bombarded with the imitation crab variety, pretty girls and airbrushed guys with little to offer above and beyond their MTV “reality” shows. I can’t get away from them – the Lauren Conrads, Heidi Montags, Spencer Pratts and Audrina Partridges of the world. I don’t watch the show, yet I know every freaking thing that’s going on in their “lives.” I’m bombarded with information about them, not because they have any redeeming qualities, or talents, or have done something noteworthy, but because they’re whores for the camera. They see a lens and instead of hiding their faces, or smiling uncomfortably and scurrying for the closest exit ala authentic celebs, they make a beeline straight for the photo op. This full-on media assault on my consciousness has caused me to avoid my usual celeb gossip haunts because I know I’m gonna find out some useless bit of information about how Audrina’s tits might be fake, or how Lauren and Heidi might finally bury the hatchet, or whether or not Spencer is going to propose again and what size diamond will he choose (it has to be big, you know how Heidi gets), and where oh where are they tying the knot, and will it be recorded and broadcast on The Hills, and will Heidi get her dress made personally by Vera Wang?

Excuse me, I’ve thrown up in my mouth a little and it tastes of my disgust in humanity.

Pictured: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, ruining the time-honored tradition of celebritydom one photo op at a time. Read the rest of this entry »