Daily Loaf

The Taylors (Swift and Lautner in front of their Barbie Dream House)

*It’s Twilight Series: New Moon week kiddies and we know you are all just as excited as we are, we being me and Franki and that is all, no one else at CL cares even a little….but that isn’t stopping me from telling YOU about the latest and greatest from the makers of Barbie, Ken and Skipper. Here is your first look at the Jacob doll (please hold all ooos, ahhhs, applause and cat calls til the end of this bullet point). You can’t put it in a Barbie bed with your Taylor Swift doll and then bust out that adorable little baby Kelly until it’s released in February, but at the bargain price of $24.95, you should probably pre-order this sculpted piece of plastic ASAP.

*Big news of what is not happening this week: Madonna is NOT going to meet Jesus’ mom. Ok, I am no “religion expert” but isn’t Madonna Jesus’ mom? Does anyone else think this is really effing weird? It’s like some sort of crazy thing that shouldn’t ever be said out loud because it causes my mind grapes to hurt.

*The smartest beauty queen in America, Carrie Prejean, seems to be really into a little homemade porn, but what beauty queen isn’t? She is reported to be in not one, two or even three sex tapes, but eight and that isn’t including the numerous times she “pulled a Vanessa Hudgens” and snapped naked pics of herself using a mirror. I tell you what, this girl is all class. (Kinda SFW pic after the jump)

Read the rest of this entry »

Does Friday the 13th equal a freaky news day in the music world? Find out here.

The Who are scheduled to perform at Super Bowl XLIV, which will be held Feb. 7, 2010, in Miami. This will be the band’s first North American performance since 2008. The biggest night in pro football and the Who? My dad (and probably yours, too) can now die happy. (But let’s hope they don’t! Die now, that is.)

Welcome to On the Radar, where we preview up-and-coming arts events to mark your calendar for. Next week, Ybor City sets the stage for two worthy comedy shows, and neither takes place at the Improv.

Four furry Southeastern funnymakers bring their “Beards of Comedy” tour to New World Brewery to entertain the beer-loving masses with their alternative brand of humor. Each comic – Dave Stone, Andy Sanford, TJ Young and Joe Zimmerman (pictured) – presents a set of his own stand-up and participates in collaborative performances of music, sketch, and improvised comedy with the rest of his comrades. Topics and styles range by comedian; Stone touches on subjects ranging from Facebooking his Pop Tart eating habits to getting warned by his dad about the perverts on “Myspaces” (“Dad, I’m a 30-year-old bearded fat man poking around on Myspace, I think I’m the predator not the prey”), Read the rest of this entry »

• With the premiere of New Moon just around the corner, this Team Taylor vs Team Rob thing is heating up and Miss Swift has picked her side. The half-Asian (she is half Asian right? Whatever, I don’t have time to Wikipedia it) Taylor Swift is getting cozy with Taylor Lautner. I couldn’t make it through this entire article but they are totally doing it, I am sure that is how it ends.

Heidi and Spencer as Jon and Kate Plus Eight.

• I recently participated in the Twitter trend “#PeopleYouWannaKillBecauseOfTheirFace” and chose Spencer Pratt. @SpencerPratt is now following me on Twitter. His possible removal from my hit list due to befriending is nullified by the following Halloween costume (pictured left). Two things I hate do not make a right.

• Just when I was starting to be okay with this whole Miley Cyrus thing (read “okay” as, “every time I hear Party in the USA I turn it up as loud as possible and sing my little heart out”),  the teens and tweens of America have turned against her! I am always behind what the kids are doing these days. Seriously, Crocs are still cool, right?

*EXCLUSIVE: Ex: A-Rod Had Portraits of Himself as Centaur Hanging Over His Bed
The only true tragedy with this story is that it does not include a photoshopped version of what this portrait probably looks like. Thank the Lord for my unmatched talents and my college education for my art skills, that I can fill this void in all our lives (my version of Alex Rodriguez in all his mythical glory, after the jump).

Read the rest of this entry »

The opening prologue to Lars von Trier’s Antichrist is so visually and rhythmically arresting that it lures the viewer into a state of calm that will slowly be smeared over broken glass as the film progresses. The director seems to take great pleasure leading the viewer through a wilderness of both pleasure and horrific despair. He knows he’s about to leave you unsettled — and he likes it.

Read the rest of this entry »

Republican blogger, daughter of John McCain, and overall minx Meghan McCain, almost pulled a Miley Cyrus this week after a racy photo on her Twitter account sparked outrage from conservatives.  With all the problems Americans face these days, why are we worried about a little cleavage?

Full “racy” shot after the break

.

. Read the rest of this entry »

Living with a small cock must be something like being a zombie.  You are stricken with a horrifying disease that controls your every move, causing you to perform inane acts all around town and in the barns of Pasco County. Contrary to popular opinion, you don’t have to have a small dick to suffer from this condition. All you really need is insecurity. This can be caused by any number of things: lack of intelligence, lack of hair, lack of funds, and yes, a lack of penis.

Read the rest of this entry »

Do to a surge in voting over the weekend, we’ve decided to keep the Best of the Bay polls open an extra two days — that means you have until Wednesday, Sept. 2 at noon to submit any and all ballots.

With some hotly-contested races like Best Local Chef, Best Local Band, Best Neighborhood and Best New Restaurant still undecided, your vote can make the difference.

Stay tuned for updates after the polls close by visiting cltampa.com/botb for updates on our Loafies awards party, to be held at our offices on Sept. 15, to be followed by our Best of the Bay issue Sept. 16.

You can also catch all updates on Best of the Bay on Twitter by looking for the tag #botb.

VOTE HERE.

Hey everyone! It’s your trusty drunk from ninebullets, Autopsy IV, checking in with another podcast chock full of alt.country/Americana/rock ‘n’ roll goodness. Give it a listen and have a drink on me.

The moment I sat down and started mapping out what songs I wanted to play this month I started getting excited. It quickly became obvious that this month’s song selection was gonna be the bomb. We got unreleased tracks from The Fox Hunt, Left Lane Cruiser, Carolyn Mark, Malcolm Holcombe, Pete Bernhard (Devil Makes Three) and Chuck Ragan, as well as newborn songs from Chad Price (Drag The River), Mat d. and the Profane Saints, The Builders and The Butchers, The Takers and Lonesome Wyatt (Those Poor Bastards) w/Rachel Brooke.

In the middle of the show I decided to do a set featuring bands who will be performing at Suburban Home’s 14th Anniversary Weekend Party, which I’ll be attending in 15 days. Hopefully I’ll come back from it with some good stories, good pictures and a few interviews.

And that does it. I’m really happy with this month’s podcast and I think y’all will like it. Do me a favor, though. If you listen and you enjoy the show, please tell other people about it!

Thanks, everyone. Autopsy IV (twitter: @autopsy4)

TRACKLISTING AND PODCAST AFTER THE JUMP
Read the rest of this entry »

Attending Mini MegaCon this past weekend was like walking into a different world than the mundane one I tend to inhabit. Stormtroopers, mystic elves, movie stars and a few renaissance festival holdovers invaded Orlando and The Rabid One and Hopp were at the center of it all.

Read the rest of this entry »

James Cameron’s Avatar doesn’t hit theaters until December, but that hasn’t stopped hyped-up fan boys and girls from getting excited now. With a wall of secrecy around the project, the desire to see something (anything!) from the flick is at such a fever pitch that a free ticket giveaway today for a special preview of the film throttled the Avatar website.

Read the rest of this entry »

They say you can see straight through to a movie’s soul when viewing its trailer. OK, nobody says that, but you know they’re thinking it. Movie trailers can be useful promotional tools when done right. Heck, some are even works of art all by themselves. Some too can be life-altering; we almost lost an entire generation of teenage girls to heart attacks when the New Moon trailer hit. So for your pleasure The Rabid One nails you with the best movie trailers of all time.

Read the rest of this entry »

@MarkSharpeFL gets Twitter. Even if he’s no @clairmc.

[About Daily Best of the Bay: Creative Loafing is posting writers' and editors' picks for Best of the Bay 2009 each day until the BOTB issue is released on Sept. 16. Vote now for your own BOTB choices in our Readers' Poll!]

This is a crosspost from my blog, ninebullets.net. I thought I’d post it here ’cause 95% of the folks reading ninebullets have every Lucero recording ever made, but I got to thinking that a good portion of Daily Loaf’s readership probably hasn’t even heard of them. So I present you with this Lucero crash course, Mixtape style. I hope you enjoy it and I’ll see you at the rock show when they come to Czar on Friday, November 13 (don’t worry, I’ll remind you again).

One of my favorite twitter friends, Romeosidvicous, posted a really nice four mix-tape introduction to Lucero yesterday and was kind enough to allow me to re-post it. I’ll let him explain the idea behind the tapes:

“I have made many Lucero CDs over the years to turn people on to their music. Today I decided that I would be lazy and simply make three one hour playlists and post them here. Now I can simply give people a URL instead of spending time making plastic discs that people just rip and file away somewhere. Three one-hour playlists turned into four playlists as I decided to toss in some of Ben Nichols’ solo work as well as some tracks from his prior band, Red 40. I enjoyed putting these together and I hope you will enjoy listening to them. You can get all of the music here, on the original discs, from the Lucero Store.”

Below the cut are the first two. If you enjoy them and want to check out the other two, head over to Romeo’s blog.

Read the rest of this entry »

It’s getting better and better to be a nerd.  Geeky girls have taken over Playboy and Twitter.  Our favorite franchises from when we were wee little nerds are coming to the silver screen, like this week’s G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.  I won’t comment on the quality of the film (in fact the Rabid One and Hopp plan on liquoring up first just to make it through), but I’m totally qualified to review the lovely women who suited up to bring this G rated cartoon to a solid PG-13.

Read the rest of this entry »

“Would you like to hold my light saber?” If you’re a nerd it’s your quintessential pick-up line when you go wherever you might go to meet ladies. It’s cute, geek-topical and extremely inoffensive. But what’s a guy to do if the woman’s he’s trying to Jedi mind-trick into bed has never seen the epic Star Wars trilogy? May virginity be with you.

Read the rest of this entry »

[About Daily Best of the Bay: Creative Loafing is posting writers' and editors' picks for Best of the Bay 2009 each day until the BOTB issue is released on Sept. 16. Vote now for your own BOTB choices in our Readers' Poll!]

With Jeff Houck (@TheStew) of the Tampa Tribune, you get food and dining coverage cooked medium-rare in a reduction sauce of snark. His Monday “Weekend Eats” retweets chronicle the amazing, drool-worthy meals his followers ate the previous weekend. And his Top Chef live commentary is a must-read complement to the broadcast each week. A sample tweet:

As for Johnson (@rommiej) — who does NOT blog in an official role as journalist, just an individual, I must preface — read a sample of his tweetstream after the break Read the rest of this entry »

There are 14 entries for the word “classic” in my thesaurus, a fact I noted when beginning my first blog for Creative Loafing’s film section. The reason I reference that particular adjective is because my first entry here deals with the historic Tampa Theatre and this past Sunday’s showing of Creature from the Black Lagoon in 3D.

Read the rest of this entry »

Somehow it’s appropriate that Paula Abdul should abdicate her judge’s throne on American Idol via Twitter. She’s made twittering (lower case) a way of life, playing the twit to Simon’s twat for years now. But was her resignation for real? The online reactions to her Twitter (TwitQuit? Quitter?) announcement last night range from surprised (HuffPo) to stricken (Ryan Seacrest’s tweet quoted on EOnline) to downright skeptical (Newsday’s TV Zone).

Read excerpts after the jump. Best line (from E): “…without Abdul, how are any of the contestants going to know where their magic is?” Read the rest of this entry »

I admit I’ve dabbled in the art of witty tweets and Facebook status updates in hopes of catching the attention of women I don’t know well enough to message. Unfortunately, my updates usually only attract the attention of guys I went to high school with and distant relatives. Serves me right I suppose.

Now I just post updates about where I’ll be and what time in hopes that my legions of virtual stalkers will be motivated to move to a more public forum. Sadly, my thousands of fans are too lazy to leave their computers and discreetly watch me eat pancakes at Waffle House.

(Video after the jump) Read the rest of this entry »

Earlier this week hopeful young ladies attended the Tampa Breeze tryouts to become part of the bay area’s hottest sports team.  The St Pete Times Forum was loaded with prospective players suited up in T-shirts, short shorts, and shoulder pads.  The Lingerie Football League may sound cute, but it’s no joke. These girls are ready to play hardcore smash-mouth football, all while looking hotter than any cheerleaders safely yelling from the sidelines.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve seen a number of risque ads in my time (see PETA’s sex with vegetables ad), but I’ve never seen a Sprite used in a bukkake scene (if you don’t know what bukkake means don’t Google it).

This Sprite commercial features an attractive woman performing oral sex on a nude man. Midway through she stops and considers how she could really go for a Sprite right about now.

Enter a crotch level Sprite, which has obviously received some vigorous stimulation. In slow motion, the soda explodes all over the thirsty woman’s face in a mess of fizzy white.

I’d have liked to believe that this ad was created by Sprite’s creative and thrifty marketing group, who knew the spot would be banned and go viral. On the internet the ad would receive a second life, reaching the key demographic of internet surfers like you and me, desperate for something to distract us from work, or unemployment. Read the rest of this entry »

What’s the buzz on the latest issues in the Green Community? Check out what you may have missed this last week:

TRA’shion Fashion and Art Show 2009 (photos) – The fabulous trashionistas were out in force for ARTpool’s annual TRA’shion Show, and photographer Chip Weiner caught all the recycled green glamour.

Letting go of addictions: Using alternative methods to release addictions of any type- Kelly Rothwell gives us alternative methods such as energetic healing, visualizations and affirmations, that can be used to not only cope with such addictions but to understand the reason behind the addiction and let it go for good.

Living sustainably in Tampa Bay: Dave Starman’s biodiesel fueled car and green lifestyle – The first in a series of profiles, by Jack B., of individuals who are living sustainably in Tampa Bay. This profiles Tampa Bay resident Dave Starman.
Read the rest of this entry »

Sheree Rensel. Twingo. Copper and mixed media on wood. 11-3/4″ x 11-3/4″ x 3″. Artist’s statement: “Twingo” is the unique and original tweet language of Twitter Tweople. Bio: BFA, MFA, Detroit artist born, NOW living and loving my art life in the real and virtual Universe.

If you’re following St. Petersburg artist Sheree Rensel on Twitter—that’s to say, if you’ve signed up to read her “tweets” or 140-character updates throughout the day—you can pretty much count on receiving a smile-inducing greeting routinely at around 9 a.m. It goes something like this:

“Good morning ART Tweople!”

(For those not already fluent in Twitterspeak, tweople—or tweeple—is a blend of “Twitter” and “people” used to refer to other users of the service. To learn more Twitterisms, consider consulting a twictionary like this one.)

A self-described “hyperactive” early adopter, Rensel has taught visual art to emotionally and developmentally disabled kids at a public school in Gulfport for 17 years, incorporating digital projects like photo portfolios and basic animation into the curriculum when possible. A mixed media artist by practice, Rensel—who describes her age as 50-something—uses Twitter mainly to keep up with other artists whose work she admires.

Read the rest of this entry »

They say the “greenest” watt of electricity is the one you never use. Here is an easy way to learn ways to reduce your energy consumption and beat the heat this summer. My colleagues at Progress Energy, calling themselves the EnergyAdvisors, are now sharing energy saving information through the social media microblog Twitter. Followers of the new Progress Energy EnergyAdvisors account will receive regular tweets throughout the summer that include practical ways they can save energy and save money on their energy bills. The program begins today and will run through Sept. 20.
Read the rest of this entry »

G4 correspondent Kelly Egarian recently hit up Erotica LA’s recent exhibition at the Los Angeles Convention Center for their yearly porn fest.  Do porn stars prefer sex in the real world or during “business hours”?  Lets find out: Read the rest of this entry »

She’s not, seriously.  However, the pop princess DID sit down with Cosmopolitan, the magazine that knows more orgasm secrets than professional sex workers, for a fun little interview and photo shoot.  And, as you may have already guessed, The Rabid One would love to wear Ms. Perry’s cherry chapstick.

Here are some lovely excerpts from the piece: Read the rest of this entry »

An intense match between the Sexy Swiss, Roger Federer, and Amazing American, Andy Roddick, in the Wimbledon finals made for some great tennis TV this weekend. The match ended with a 16-14 marathon fifth set — the longest in Grand Slam history.  Federer aced Roddick, taking the victory for the No. 1 tennis player in ATP rankings.

The Williams’ sisters battled it out in a close match for the women’s singles title at Wimbledon. Little sister Serena pulled out her third Wimbledon championship and beat her older sister Venus: 7-6 6-2.

Who would you rather have sex with from Wimbledon? Vote now!

 Loading …

 Loading …

Follow Emmalee on Twitter at twitter.com/emmaleeschmidt

Nerds rejoice!  Finally geekdom is not only cool, it’s kind of hot.  I present to you, courtesy of our good friends at Playboy, G4TV’s resident temptress Olivia Munn from Attack of the Show.  The geeky goddess is the magazine’s latest cover girl and here is proof that playing video games all day can be sexy (ok, that’s a stretch).  Also included are some of the Rabid One’s favorite selections from Playboy’s “Sweetest Tweets,” the geekiest hot girls to follow on Twitter.  If these gals don’t make you want to press UP, UP, DOWN, DOWN, LEFT, RIGHT, B, A, START than there is something wrong with your joystick.

Read the rest of this entry »

A few weeks ago, I joined Twitter on the advice of super food blogger Jaden Hair of Steamy Kitchen. It has been great. The hardest thing by far is to schedule actual “twitter sessions” during my work day, or I’ll just produce absolutely nothing and tweet all day.

For anyone who’s unaware, on Twitter, you can “follow” people (meaning you can read their constant updates in real time) or you can be “followed” by others (meaning people who “follow” you can read your constant updates in real time). Needless to say, the more followers you get, in comparison to the ones you follow, the cooler you are in Twitterville. But also, the quality of the people who follow you is really important. Following Barack Obama, Demi Moore or Jay Leno, for instance, is not as cool as being followed by said persons. It’s a balancing act.

There’s always someone you admire, a guru you cherish, or a big shot you respect. For chefs like me, being followed by Thomas Keller, Daniel Boulud or Grant Achatz would be a huge deal.

And that brings me to Eric Ripert. Read the rest of this entry »

Courtney Love is nuts. (Newsflash, right?) Years of drug abuse will do that to a person. She uses the Internet predominantly to bicker with Ryan Adams and wonder aloud, “What happened to all that Nirvana money!?”

Sometimes, she covers both topics simultaneously! She either hasn’t quite grasped or doesn’t give a shit about Twitter’s 140-character limit, opting instead for stream-of-consciousness commentary and storytelling sometimes interrupted mid-word. And she’s still close pals with lone original Smashing Pumpkin Billy Corgan.

Love has worked intermittently on her second solo album Nobody’s Daughter over the past three years. Because of various false starts and Internet leaks, the disc is three producers and four studios deep. Now it seems Nobody’s Daughter won’t even be a Courtney Love solo album. Courtney has taken a page from Corgan’s playbook and resurrected a dormant, yet familiar name.

Hole.

Read more.

Check out CL’s main music site. You’ll be glad you did.

Music contributor Joel Weiss issued this lively splash of music news:

The mid-90’s Britpop feud between Oasis and Blur has become the stuff of legend. Noel Gallagher once famously hoped Blur frontman Damon Albarn would “catch AIDS and die” (he since recanted, blaming drugs for the outburst).  Surprisingly, he’s 100% behind the current Blur reunion: “I’m right into the Blur reunion, ’cause it’ll finish off the Kaiser Chiefs and put them to bed. There’s nothing worse than a shit Blur. And at least the original shit Blur are back to finish off all these other shit Blurs. I’m bang into the Blur reunion.”

From an old reunion to a possible new one: Nine Inch Nails‘ Trent Reznor no longer thinks very highly about former friend and collaborator Marilyn Manson.  Reznor calls Manson “a malicious guy and will step on anybody’s face to succeed and cross any line of decency … Seeing him now, drugs and alcohol now rule his life and he’s become a dopey clown. He used to be the smartest guy in the room.  And as a fan of his talents, I hope he gets his shit together.”

Lots of news on the Flaming Lips, The Cult, STP, Moz, and more after the jump!

Read more

Check out CL’s music site

I stood rejected at the gates of hell. Who knew you needed an invitation? (S. Bosco)

A couple of months ago I finally caved and got a Twitter account. Because mostly everything in my world revolves around some kind of writing, mainly fiction, I thought, Wouldn’t it be great to write some 140-character flash fiction? I’ll bet no one else has thought of that, right? Well, wrong. Lots of people have thought of it.

When I wrote a Daily Loaf post about short Twitter fiction last month, the Twitter flash fiction writers crawled out of the woodwork. So I’m going to share a few examples here:

Ben White, midnightstories, writes one piece each night at midnight. He’s a really disciplined guy and actually keeps to his schedule. Here are a few of my favorites:

I feel my bed writhing as I wake up. I panic, then realize that my VR gear is still on. Exhale — fell asleep trying to ignore the war again.

As an immortal, I was always frightened of being buried alive. But it is worse now: they installed an LCD screen playing reality TV in mine. Read the rest of this entry »

There were several enormous bombshells dropped today at Microsoft’s E3 press conference. Among the various expected and unexpected game titles was the news that Microsoft will be integrating Twitter, Facebook, and Last.fm into their LIVE services, as well as looking to improve their current Netflix and streaming video offerings. When you consider that Microsoft is attempting to pull in the entire family to using their consoles – as well as attracting non-gaming families – this is a move that makes a great deal of sense.

Read the rest of this entry »

With this post, I make a strong case for the use of the social-media, micro-blogging tool Twitter as an extremely useful resource for staying connected to and up-to-the-minute with the green community, or any other community, for that matter. More on that later.

The case for Twitter requires use of the many and ever-growing list of applications to manage, filter, and access the flow of Tweets (comments). While the overall signal-to-noise ratio on Twitter may not be that high (case in point would be Oprah’s first Tweets that were little more than noise — dare I say white noise?), there is a high quality, high velocity stream of information, if you just know where and how to look.

The first step to creating a noise filter (to only see and/or block certain Tweets) requires a visit to the Twitter search engine. Navigating without this feature would be like finding something on the internet without a search engine (e.g., Google). Because of the “open architecture” characteristics of Twitter, ALL words in ALL tweets are searchable. Here is link to a search on all tweets that include “Creative Loafing” and “tampa”. And since the tweets update in real time, you always have the most up-to-date information. Read the rest of this entry »