Profile: Jamie Karns, bouncer
July 19, 2008 at 12:00 pm by Michelle Ye Hee Lee in Profile
Jamie Karns is a bouncer at Lenny’s Bar and Grill. At six-feet two-inches tall and 415 pounds, 37-year-old Karns is also known as Fat Guy.
What kind of training do you need to be a bouncer?
Patience is the biggest factor. There’s not really a special class on how to throw someone out, but you need to be able to control your temper when somebody is obviously drunk and not get mad at him for being rude.
How can you recognize a fake ID?
Most of them are pretty bad. Things like, the girl’s eyes are blue but the girl your talking to’s eyes are green. The manufactured fake ID, things like the watermarks are wrong, the color of ink they use is wrong.
Just how bad do they get?
I’ve gotten several IDs from people I know. A total stranger walks up and gives me an ID of someone I actually know. And I’m like, “This isn’t you.” And they’re like, “Oh, yes it is.” But I’m like, “This is the guy I went to high school with, it’s not you.”
What would you do if someone brought in a McLovin ID (from the movie Superbad)?
That would definitely not fly. First off, no one has just one name, you know? But odd states like Hawaii and whatnot, don’t work. Give me the one of the state you’re in.
Do girls try to flirt with you to get in?
Mm-hmm.
Does it work?
Not at all. I’ve been doing this a long time. So I’ve heard it all, seen it all. The girl thinks she’s gonna get over on somebody and it’s not gonna happen. Usually the prettier and richer they are, the more mad they get that it didn’t work. That’s a fact.
What’s the worst fight you’ve been in?
In Florida I used to work at a bar similar to Lenny’s. This Indian came in and got really drunk and an argument between two guys started. There were bar stools, pool balls, they were throwing everything everywhere. I had to lock the staff in the office and have them call the police and go out there and try and regulate the best you can without getting killed.
Did you get hit by pool balls and sticks?
I try not to. I’ve been hit by several pool sticks and chairs, but I’ve never been hit by a pool ball. Thank God, because they’d probably take me out instantly.
What do you do in your free time?
I’m a nerd. I like to build computers. I like to play video games. I like to watch DVDs. I have a huge DVD collection. I volunteer for Dragon*Con every year.
Do you dress up?
No, I don’t have time, usually.
What would you dress up as if you did?
I always wanted to dress up as Juggernaut. He’s one of those super villains you read about in comic books back in the day that just gets no love whatsoever, but he can just run through walls. It’d be an easy costume for someone my size to do. I just couldn’t see myself squeeze into a Batman costume or a Superman outfit.
How did you end up being a bouncer?
Where I’m from, we used to wear boxing gloves and fight, not really out of anger but just to settle arguments. And that’s how I grew up, everybody’s fightin’ everybody. So when I got old enough to work, it was, “You can do construction and sweat your ass off all day long, or you can work at a night club and talk to girls all night long, because you’re huge.” So I went to the nightclub.
Who would win if you challenged Mr. T in the World’s Toughest Bouncer competition?
Oh, I would win, hands down. Mr. T, he had his day. I can take Mr. T.
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