Fresh Loaf

Today’s Air Loaf features CL’s Chanté Lagon speaking with Andisheh Nouraee about some of those profiled in this year’s Atlanta’s 11 Least Influential list. From the unemployed dairy goat, to the bummed out cellist, to the non-racist guy with racist paraphernalia, we celebrate those who lack influence.

Air Loaf is broadcast weekdays on 1690 WMLB-AM at approximately 8:10 a.m., 12:20 p.m. and 6:20 p.m.

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CNN’s Anderson Cooper was on Jay Leno last night and admitted to watching “junk” on the tube, specifically namechecking a particular show we hold dear in our hearts, “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.”

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Our staff photographer Joeff Davis will be covering a number of events around town tonight, and he’ll be posting images on this post. Check back later for updates, and stay tuned for our election results liveblog at 6 p.m.

(Photographs by Joeff Davis)

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CL wavered through weekend construction traffic downtown (not really, some of us took MARTA) to witness the amazing spectacle that is a Miss Klingon pageant – and everything else during this weekend’s Dragon*Con.

See all the pics at Creative Loafing’s Sideshow Atlanta photo blog.

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First week of school done and already sick of it? Can’t wait to graduate? No worries, CL’s got your back all semester long, we’ll do a series of posts looking at crucial pieces of information from last week’s College Guide (you did read it, didn’t you?) to get you through ’till finals week.

First, academics. Nothing’s more important than starting your semester on the right track and with a good game-plan, so how about the top 5 study spots that aren’t the library? Because you know, sometimes library quiet is too quiet. Who knows, maybe you’ll round-up a nice study group and do more than hit the books.

Of course, first weeks of school are notorious for those of you trying to pay for school, so here’s a guide on how to limit the painful payback of student loans.  In 2006, 56 percent of recent Georgia graduates were in debt, owing an average of $17,753 for student loans, according to the Project on Student Debt, so click through to find out what loan decisions are the right decisions.

And last but not least, check out 12 local book shops worth browsing for more than just textbooks.

» CL’s College Guide 2008

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CL got a chance to walk around building 3 at AmericasMart and see behind-the-scenes of the recent August Apparel Market. Out of the many designers and vendors that exhibit, there are local success stories like Pecan Pie Couture, whose chief designer Clint Zeagler won best local clothing designer in Best of Atlanta 2007.

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I know, I know, you guys were all oh-so-disappointed to learn I completely bummed on Crystal Ball Tuesdays this week.

You can thank Creative Loafing Tampa and their Summer Guide for my lapse, as I was too busy chiseling the HTML on that special issue.

I do have some quirky e-mails, but I believe the matter at hand right now is YouTube Fridays.

Off we go:

Even though this is a blatant commercial, I couldn’t pass it up. I mean, you can’t go wrong with “pistol-packing Southern belles.” This is the tale of Busted PI, a local private-investigator group specializing in catching you cheating dudes in the act (or thereabouts).

Is it me, or does the setup reek of sapphic porn?

I dunno, you be the judge. And if you do find yourself in need of their services, go ahead and click on that video for their contact info.

In keeping with the “Southern belle” theme, here’s our belated Crystal Ball Tuesdays question of the week.

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I’m not slacking today, no sir. And since I was generous on Tuesday, giving you two videos for the price of one, I kinda like the trend. So two videos it is.

Away we go:

The spectacle of a giant, 6-foot Afro pick stuck on giant bushes seems too good to resist, so someone snatched them up and took them home.

Note how the CBS 46 EXCLUSIVE was also teased by Channel 2 Action News (second video).

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I’ve been toiling away with this introduction for a while now, and since I don’t know how best to break it open, I’m just going to come out and say it. What’s the big freakin’ deal about Cinco de Mayo?

That was rhetorical; I know what the big deal is, but I presume the more important question is, do you know what the underlying issue is?

Before I bog you down with cultural hand-me-downs, we should all agree on the premise of tomorrow’s “holiday.” It is designed (i.e. planned, outlined, masterminded) to sell margaritas and Coronas. I know this for two reasons: As a former server at two different Mexican restaurants, Cinco de Mayo is the one day where we know we can up-sell those margaritas, and it’s the day when we would break out the bucket o’ Coronas. Other than that, this “date” has no more semblance, at least, in cultural terms, than the day of the virgin of Guadalupe (and I might actually get some, um, strongly worded e-mails regarding this).

Yes, yes, Cinco de Mayo, or “May 5th” – you’ll be surprised how many people don’t know this– was an important military victory in Mexico’s history; I’m sure you’ve been talked down before by cultural purists. How this became a reason to drink tequila is beyond me. But as an immigrant, or better yet, as a recently naturalized Hispanic immigrant, it kind of puzzles me that we need a reason to “think” about factions of our society that otherwise go ignored.

I don’t think this is an exclusive trait of American society, but it’s curious how commercializing a pseudo-holiday reinforces the American conscious practice of observance.

You may ask yourself: But what is it that goes ignored? Well, from an outsider’s point of view, I can tell you that there isn’t a clear understanding as to why we celebrate Cinco de Mayo – we just do. Was adopting this date as our own a sincere gesture in trying to diversify our society? I would hope so, even though my pessimistic subconscious would strongly disagree.

But I guess that’s the point: I find it pleasant to think that tomorrow, the whole country will celebrate Cinco de Mayo, and that people will consciously think about going to a Mexican restaurant to consume tequilas, margaritas and Coronas. In other words, I appreciate the fact that people will consciously open up their minds to cultural traits that are slightly foreign, but that are slowly becoming ingrained in the American psyche, and more importantly, to the American identity.

I would argue that more than a “Mexican” holiday, Cinco de Mayo is an “American” holiday – it’s something akin to St. Patrick’s Day, where the history behind the date has allowed for a reinterpretation of what it means to Americans. Sure, pessimists will say that these are days when people drink. But then they would epitomize the very thing they’re criticizing. Why oversimplify the reasons that inspire action?

I know that some elements of our society will exploit it for their gain (that means you, Mr. Jose Cuervo), so why not us? I will; I’m going to help speed up the assimilation process by downing a few shots of Patron.

So, in honor of tomorrow, the layman’s guide to good tequila – after the jump.

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I flaked last Friday, and I apologize. I should have given you guys a good video fresh from the files of YouTube (and appropriately tagged with “Atlanta” – gotta keep it local) and I didn’t. So, to make up for Friday’s dearth of YouTubeness, here are two videos that I just happened to come across:

…and this other one needs some background. Colombian pop singer Andres Cepeda made his way to Atlanta to play a very intimate show last Sunday at Club Europe. This video is from said performance…

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It’s Tuesday, you know what that means, time to predict the future.

Not really, but it’s time for another Crystal Ball batch of weird e-mails. I sincerely hope those who send this in earnest don’t spite me for the rest of their lives. I really did want to find answers to your questions; alas, I simply siphon them to the appropriate parties, lest I get fired for not doing so.

But these are the bastard questions of vagabond souls, and with the help of you, we may shed a light onto their path to being answered. Or whatever.

This past week I only received two good questions that I couldn’t fetch an answer to, so here we go:

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I don’t know about you, but if I paid half a million bucks for my condo and I got coyotes running around my neighborhood, I’d want some answers. Nothing like critters to drive down the price of property. And with this real estate bubble bursting at the seams (if it had any), I can’t afford to have ‘em dining on posh cats.

That’s if I paid half a mil for a condo. (Not that I did or anything.) From the AJC:

VININGS: Homeowners unite to fight bold coyotes

By H.M. Cauley
For the Journal-Constitution
Published on: 04/26/07

Seems the Buckhead coyotes have cousins in Vinings. Residents of the village just over the Chattahoochee River have encountered many of the same animal problems experienced by Buckhead residents around Phipps Plaza. And the biggest concern is missing pets.

“We’ve lost about 50 cats,” said Debbie Bolt, president of the Vinings Civic Club. “I got involved in the problem because so many people were calling about it.”

The problem has become so severe that homeowners have pooled resources to hire “the coyote guy” — John Underwood of Atlanta Animal Evictions. He’s not a bit surprised that the predators have shown up in another neighborhood a few miles from Buckhead.

“Coyotes have a big territory, and they’re continually making circuits of seven to eight miles,” Underwood said. “I’ve been working the area from Log Cabin Drive to [U.S.] 41 and from the river to I-285 for the past eight months, and you may only see one every seven or 10 days.”

Underwood already has captured and put down 15 coyotes from the Vinings clan, which has convinced people there really is a problem.

Only one every seven or 10 days, huh. Well, that ain’t that bad, is it?

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Jumping dog…

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So have I been living under a rock? Who is this Alexyss K. Tylor lady and why hasn’t anyone said (read: blogged) anything about her before?

OK, OK, I know; I haven’t been under a rock exactly — just north in the suburbs, meaning I don’t get Atlanta Public Access TV. And yes, I know, Ms. Tylor is actually very popular on the Nets (and blog Nets).

But for those, like me, not in the know, Alexyss K. Tylor hosts the a sex-ed talk show stressing “Vagina Power” (alongside her mom, nonetheless), at 9 p.m. Wednesdays, on Atlanta Public TV (otherwise known as People TV).

As an homage to Ms. Tylor (and to kick off a new category I shall call YouTube Fridays) here’s “the Jackrabbit remix” to “Vagina Power vs. Penis Power,” uploaded by yeshe11111.

The Jackrabbit is, you know, a sex toy for girls.

You can find some clips of the the “Alexyss Tylor” show here.

UPDATE: OK, as our good friend ..gabriel.. points out (see comments), there’s an actual VIDEO of the Jackrabbit Remix (not just the song). I’ve updated the YouTube clip accordingly.

Ah, the wonders of Public TV.

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Nothing better than to wake up to news that researchers think we’re all a bunch of pervs. In the ever-lasting search for understanding of why people get aroused, a “study funded by the Atlanta-based Center for Behavioral Neuroscience (CBN) analyzed the viewing patterns of men and women looking at sexual photographs, and the result was not what one typically might expect.”

Their words, not mine.

Researchers hypothesized women would look at faces and men at genitals, but, surprisingly, they found men are more likely than women to first look at a woman’s face before other parts of the body, and women focused longer on photographs of men performing sexual acts with women than did the males. These types of results could play a key role in helping researchers to understand human sexual desires and its ultimate effect on public health.

Guess what, they also found out that men and women showed different patterns of brain activity when viewing sexual stimuli.

Turns out, both men and women like to stare at each other’s junk.

Here’s the kicker:

Although it is commonly assumed males have more interest in visual sexual stimuli, researchers are working to figure out what characteristics are important to men and women in their evaluations of sexual stimuli.

The answer may lie within a small section of the brain called the amygdala, which is important in the processing of emotional information. In Dr. Hamann and Wallen’s previous fMRI study, men showed more activation in the amygdala in response to sexual vs. neutral stimuli than did women.

There you have it, guys, blame it on your amygdala.