Fresh Loaf

Ample-chested blonds across the country grabbed their sledgehammers this week when it was announced that the CIA had purchased software to monitor “blog posts, Twitter tweets and chatter across the Internet.”

Visible Technologies’ platform helps brands to monitor the millions of posts and conversations on blogs, forums, YouTube, Twitter and other online forums. “There is a world full of countries with people who are in online chat rooms,” Tighe says. “They may talk about something important to national security issues, or maybe someone becomes concerned about what they hear in one of these rooms.”

In celebration of this purchase I would like to say hello to the CIA: 9/11, RaHoWa, Building 7, JFK, Area 51.

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BUSH: Secretly ordered the recent covert military strike in Pakistan, according to the NY Times, a major detachment from the usual U.S. tactic of using unmanned Predator spy planes to fire at suspected al-Qaeda targets in the country.

MCCAIN: Leads Obama by 18 points in Georgia.

HURRICANE IKE: Barreling toward Houston and Galveston, expected to be a Category 3 when it hits Friday night. Thousands of coastal Texans are evacuating.

CAGLE: Will run for governor in 2010.

THE POACH STATE: Georgia is among the fast-growing states poaching teachers from more economically strapped states, such as Michigan.

EXCELLENCE DEFICIENCY: The Commission for School Board Excellence, formed at the request of the Georgia Board of Education, is recommending that Georgia should have more power to intervene in dysfunctional local school boards such as Clayton’s.

BOBBY COX: Will return next season.

TOUCH AND GO: A Fulton Superior Court judge dismisses a lawsuit by VOTER GA challenging the fraud-proofness of the state’s touch-screen voting machines. VOTER GA’s Garland Favorito says the group may appeal.

CUMBERLAND ISLAND: Will begin tours of its north end, which had previously only been accessible to visitors via a 17-mile hike.

UGA: Will face its first real test of the season as it enters SEC play against Spurrier’s Gamecocks in Columbia Saturday.

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SPY VS. PIE: The AP reports that Julia Child left a career as a WWII-era spy to become a chef; Child is one of several well-known Americans whose previously secret spy career was revealed this morning, as the personnel files of the pre-CIA Office of Strategic Services were declassified.

SHOOTING: The chairman of the Arkansas Democratic Party is dead after a recently fired Target employee mysteriously drove more than 30 miles to Little Rock and shot him.

LANIER: Georgia officials asked SCOTUS this morning to overturn a February appeals-court ruling requiring congressional approval for the state to take more water from Lake Lanier to quench Atlanta’s growing thirst.

STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE: The NYT reports on the resurgent popularity of streetcars in at least 40 U.S. downtowns such as Cincinnati, New Orleans, Houston and Charlotte. Not mentioned: Atlanta’s distant visions for the Beltline and Peachtree Street streetcar.

SACS: The accrediting agency is in Clayton County today, part of its review to determine whether the school system will be the first since 1969 to have its accreditation revoked.

SCRATCH PAPER: Cox Newspapers is selling all but three of its newspapers.

RESCUE 911: The recent death of a Johns Creek woman highlights problems in the Fulton County emergency services, as the 911 operator who sent emergency crews 30 miles in the wrong direction had a long history of such routing mistakes. She also repeatedly was disciplined for sleeping on the job, chronic tardiness and fighting with co-workers, and records show her behavior wasn’t uncommon in the department.

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Michael Currie Schaffer on the United States’ ugly new passports:

Apparently, someone forgot that passports are mainly meant to be read by, you know, foreigners. Plastered like a NASCAR vehicle with cheeseball patriotic clip-art that might have been swiped from the Colbert Report’s opening credits, the new books spill jingoism the way traveling Americans once spilled hard currency.

Clip-art patriotism and tchotchke patriotism aren’t just tacky. They’re phony.

Patriotism is about the way you live your life, not the objects you affix to your suit jacket. Do you do things that help your country and countrymen? Then you’re a patriot, even if you dance to the “Internationale” in Che Guevara boxer shorts.

If I sound grumpy, it’s because I am. Too many flag-in-lapel-types support the atrocities I describe in my column this week for me to feel glib about “cheeseball patriotic clip-art.”

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