Fresh Loaf

President George W. Bush yesterday issued 14 pardons and commuted two prison sentences in what surely will be one of the lame duck president’s most monumental acts in the last eight years. (Yes, I know, every president pardons ne’er-do-wells and scoundrels. Clinton had Marc Rich, Carter had Attila the Hun. Obama will probably pardon Predator.)

As Ken Layne at Wonkette accurately pointed out, a lot of the crimes Bush pardoned are run-of-the-mill — drugs, importing protected wildlife, and killing the nation’s majestic feathered symbol.

But with everything involving crime and silliness, there’s a Georgia angle. According to the Associated Press, among the folks Bush pardoned yesterday was in the most lotto-happy town in Jawjuh:

Obie Gene Helton of Rossville, Ga., whose offense was unauthorized acquisition of food stamps.

Yep. Food stamps. Is this “compassionate conservatism?”

The Chattanoogan:

Obie Gene Helton was sentenced April 1, 1983, to two years probation for unauthorized acquisition of food stamps. He was fined $500 and ordered to pay $875 in restitution, according to information provided by the Justice Department.

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RNC: Fred Thompson, Joseph Lieberman and a not-too-close President Bush regaled John McCain during the first full day of convention festivities in St. Paul Tuesday. Meanwhile, Ron Paul held his own convention outside Minneapolis Tuesday, rallying his troops behind his libertarian conservatism.

SAVANNAH: May need to evacuate for Hannah, which is expected to be a Category 1 hurricane when it makes landfall Friday. Some scrambling for flood insurance find out it’s too late.

ROTARY CUB: The newborn panda at Zoo Atlanta is back out of the incubator and with its mother, Lun Lun.

TYING UP JUICE ENDS: Coca-Cola is hoping to capitalize on its recent Beijing marketing blitz by making a bid for China’s largest juice company, which would be its second-largest acquisition ever.

DECORUM, BUT NO QUORUM: The new, relatively uncontroversial Clayton school board has just three members, two short of a quorum, but has 45 days to appoint additional members.

UGA: Falls to No. 2 in both major polls despite winning Saturday, as USC’s rout of Virginia leapfrogs the Trojans to the top spot.

CHIPPER JONES: Atlanta third baseman’s quest for the NL batting title is the only silver lining left on the Braves’ dismal season.

CHENEY: The vice president will speak Sept. 19 in North Georgia at the opening-day ceremony for the 145th anniversary of the Battle of Chickamauga.

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I admire the craft in the following sentence by AJC political writer Jim Galloway describing Bush’s visit to Atlanta today.

Galloway’s doesn’t literally editorialize, but his choice of words makes it crystal clear that the visit will inconvenience thousands of local working commuters to the benefit of no one except a far-away political candidate and his deep-pocketed benefactors.

Traffic along I-75 will likely suffer late this afternoon, as President Bush arrives in Atlanta for a private, rush-hour fund-raiser in Buckhead to benefit a middle Georgia congressional candidate.

I grew up outside of D.C. and have been caught in a few motorcade traffic jams. I can recall being stuck in my car in Georgetown in 1995 or so, desperate to drive anywhere with a bathroom, but unable to budge because President Clinton was nearby.

I didn’t wet myself, but I haven’t forgotten, Bill.

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President George Bush recently attended the G8 Summit in Japan. His kind farewell to other world leaders convinced Americans abroad to continue stitching Canadian flags on their backpacks.

The Telegraph reports, with emphasis added:

The American leader, who has been condemned throughout his presidency for failing to tackle climate change, ended a private meeting with the words: “Goodbye from the world’s biggest polluter.”

He then punched the air while grinning widely, as the rest of those present including Gordon Brown and Nicolas Sarkozy looked on in shock.

Mr Bush, whose second and final term as President ends at the end of the year, then left the meeting at the Windsor Hotel in Hokkaido where the leaders of the world’s richest nations had been discussing new targets to cut carbon emissions.

One official who witnessed the extraordinary scene said afterwards: “Everyone was very surprised that he was making a joke about America’s record on pollution.”

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No one can say President Bush isn’t making personal sacrifices for U.S. troops.

From Politico:

Q Mr. President, you haven’t been golfing in recent years. Is that related to Iraq?

THE PRESIDENT: Yes, it really is. I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the Commander-in-Chief playing golf. I feel I owe it to the families to be as — to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal.

Q Mr. President, was there a particular moment or incident that brought you to that decision, or how did you come to that?

THE PRESIDENT: No, I remember when de Mello, who was at the U.N., got killed in Baghdad as a result of these murderers taking this good man’s life. And I was playing golf — I think I was in central Texas — and they pulled me off the golf course and I said, it’s just not worth it anymore to do.

Here’s the video.

Is callowness an impeachable offense?

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After Pope Benedict XVI gave a speech at the White House yesterday, President Bush stood up and complimented him.

“Thank you, Your Holiness,” he said. “Awesome speech.”

I’m all for mocking President Bush for his inappropriately fratty demeanor.

But in fairness to Bush, there’s clearly something about Pope Benedict XVI that overwhelms people with feelings of awesomeness.

Check out this short clip from National Public Radio, which aired shortly after Benedict ascended to the Pope-osphere in 2005.

Play it loud because, it’s, well, awesome.

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Last night, President Bush released excerpts of the speech he’s going to give today about Iraq on the fifth anniversary of the Iraq war.

As expected, it’s a collage of lies and spin:

“In Iraq, we are witnessing the first large-scale Arab uprising against Osama bin Laden, his grim ideology, and his terror network.”

Osama bin Laden doesn’t now, nor has he ever controlled Iraq. Bush is conflating the Iraq war with the man responsible for 9/11.

The only reason Iraqis have the had the opportunity to turn against al-Qaeda operatives in Iraq is because we created the chaos that allowed them to operate.

It’s true that many Sunni tribal leaders in Iraq have turned against extremists in Iraq like al Qaeda, but Bush is taking credit for Iraqis tackling a problem that his invasion created.

“The surge has done more than turn the situation in Iraq around — it has opened the door to a major strategic victory in the broader war on terror,”

That’s like chopping off a man’s arms and calling yourself a doctor because you brought him paper towels and Bactine.

The troop escalation, known as the surge, has been a skillful refinement of tactics. But even its architect, Gen. David Petraeus, acknowledges it’s a strategic failure so far because Iraqi leaders will not reconcile.

The declared purpose of the escalation was to slow violence enough to facilitate political progress in Iraq. No such progress has been made.

“The successes we are seeing in Iraq are undeniable,”

Millions of Iraqis have fled since the invasion. Millions more were forced from their homes and live as refugees in their own country.

The lowest estimate of Iraqi war dead is 81,000. Iraq is 1/12 the size of the U.S. A similarly deadly war in this country would leave 1 million people dead.

Undeniable success.

(Illustration by Jeremy Fuerst)

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From Politico:

President George Bush has chosen Southern Methodist University in Dallas as the site of his presidential library, officials familiar with the decision said.

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