Heat, milk and oral jouissance
June 2nd, 2009 by Cliff Bostock in Food & Life, Restaurants
I was engaging my addiction — eating at Spoon’s eastside location — a few nights ago when a nearby table of five began chanting an annoying mantra I’ve heard in restaurants for years:
“It’s so spicy! Ow, it’s so spicy! I didn’t know it was going to be this spicy! Ow, it’s so spicy! I can’t eat it! My mouth burns! It’s so spicy!” (Repeat.)
Spoon’s staff all but physically examines diners’ tongues in order to ascertain tolerance of chili heat. They always explain that they offer dishes with mild, hot and “Thai hot” sauces. Other restaurants do the same thing. But it doesn’t seem to matter. People still wave their hands in front of their mouths and guzzle water and then recite the Mantra of the Blistered Tongue.
Over the years, I’ve dined with many friends who, as we settled into our chairs, announced that they hoped the food was “not too spiiiiiicy.”
“Why did you want to come here if you don’t like spicy food?” I’d ask.
“Oh,” they’d invariably say, “I love spicy food. I just don’t like it too spicy.”
“Too spicy” of course always turned out to be anything hotter than Taco Bell seasonings.
Anyway, here’s what to do, instead of waving your hands and shouting. Ask for a glass of milk. I’m always amazed how many people don’t know this. Milk will almost instantly stop the burning. There are other remedies, including increasing the amount of rice you mix with the sauce, but milk works best. Cecil Adams, author of The Straight Dope explained why long ago.
But, really, learn to enjoy the pain. It’s all about oral jouissance, baby.
June 2nd, 2009 at 3:43 pm
I love spicy and not taco bell seasoning spicy. I like it HOT!! Bring on the peppers.
June 2nd, 2009 at 4:04 pm
I am going to Spoon East for the first time. They better get some extra peppers if they are going to take me down. I do not trust people who do not like spicy foods.
June 2nd, 2009 at 5:00 pm
I haven’t tried the East Atlanta Spoon yet but have been ordering my takeout from the downtown Spoon as “Thai Hot” for years now and it’s frequently not quite spicy enough. And I’m not some stud who chomps on habaneros for giggles. Anyone who thinks that Spoon’s “Regular Spicy” is too hot should probably just eat oatmeal and water crackers.
June 2nd, 2009 at 5:32 pm
Honestly, I think Spoon’s degree of heat is unpredictable. My first few experiences with the East Atlanta restaurant’s dishes was to find them really hot, even those described as “mild.” Now, the “hot” dishes seem only mildly so most of the time. So I’m moving up to “Thai hot.” I suppose this could be my own palate’s acclimation, but I doubt it.
June 2nd, 2009 at 8:47 pm
I stumbled upon Cecil’s web site a few weeks ago and immediately lost about four hours of my Saturday.
Those folks should try Spoon’s masaman curry or pad thai. They’d be safe.
June 3rd, 2009 at 8:09 am
It’s funny that people get puffed up because they’re more tolerant of spice than others. Get over yourself – you were born that way.
As for me, I do like food spicy but not too spicy. Sorry if that offends but it’s how I like it.
June 3rd, 2009 at 8:58 am
I am offended.
June 3rd, 2009 at 1:48 pm
I always had a hard time answering people’s queries about how spicy food was while waiting tables in college. What to me was not spicy was too spicy for many people. I eventually just started telling people I was the wrong guy to ask.
The hottest food I ever had was at the Bombay Grill off 285. Goat vindaloo was served to me extra spicy because I acted like a jerk. I loved it. My eyes and nose were running and I even got a little dizzy and hallucinatory.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:14 pm
The entire badge of honor re: spice tolerance has always been funny to me. My completely unqualified understanding is that while everyone’s tastebuds change as they get older, they also get much duller. So, people naturally need more spice, salt, etc. to perk up the flavors of their food.
I’ve seen this happen with my own parents. As a Mexican family, there was homemade salsa on the table at every dinner. My parents used to only use a little. But now they put it on everything–and I mean everything. But I can only handle a little heat these days even though I ate habaneros most of my life.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:38 pm
Actually, there have been quite a few articles printed here and there in the last few years about the way Baby Boomers are dumping hot stuff on all their food. I think I linked to this article a year or so ago:
http://tinyurl.com/2lnftn
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:52 pm
After reading Cliff’s first review, I ordered “regular spicy” on my first visit. Child’s play. On my next visit, I ordered “Thai hot.” No way. It was what I would call “regular spicy.” I’m gonna have to ask for some chilis on the side next time. I’m no fire-eater but I like it hot, not medium. Food’s good, not great.
June 5th, 2009 at 12:35 am
Rico: Did you order curries or stir fries?