Guarana Nation
Thursday, September 4th, 2008“An iced Americano, please.” The barista smiled, punched in my order and suggested, “Would you like to try one of our new energy drinks? They have ginseng, B-vitamins, and guarana.”
Ginseng, B-vitamins, and guarana. I thought of “guano” (Incan for bat shit). “Um, no. Thanks.” I turned away, slurping my Americano, perplexed.
I knew she wouldn’t put bat shit in my coffee, but I certainly didn’t want to chance a potential Central American bat disease.
Trying to be unbiased and forget my fecal association with the word, I went home and did a little research. From what I gathered, if you’re a smoker, pregnant, have high blood pressure, heart problems, or simply a healthy human, you should approach the ingestion of guarana as if it were a high-speed rollercoaster or crack-cocaine.
