The Short List — Fri., May 9
May 9th, 2008 by Joe Bardi in Politics, Presidential Politics, The Morning Papers
What will you do with your government stimulus check?
- Barack’s “victory lap.”
- Hillary just keeps on campaigning.
- “Dear Barack, why are you being such a stickler for the rules?”
- Let the Lebanese civil war commence.
- Citigroup to trim about $400 billion worth of fat.
- WTF: The 3-year old St. Pete boy who has never fallen asleep.
- Your Lost recap. (I have to start watching the show alone so I can hear over all the people in the room bad-mouthing it as it plays.)
- Dude, that’s not what we meant by “head shop.”
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May 9th, 2008 at 10:03 am
That three-year-old is taking Warren Zevon just a little too seriously I reckon.
Speaking of Warren Zevon(this is the way we force a segue, so early in the morning), my vote for best line in a song ever:
“Little old lady got mutilated late last night. Werewolves of London again.”
Can’t help but smile when you sing that one.
May 9th, 2008 at 10:43 am
How exactly would you use a corpse’s head as a bong? Not that I want to try it. Just curious. I prefer the more conventional methods, which I partook in last night and it made Lost even more mind blowing. I must have said, “WTF” about 20 times.
Also, is there another place to read about that 3-year-old who has never fallen asleep? That video doesn’t seem to be working anymore.
May 9th, 2008 at 10:59 am
Very dark, WP. I like that.
Kyle, we had a discussion yesterday about how to use a head as a bong, and the nearest I can figure is block one ear hole, put the weed in the other, use the nose as a carb and suck the smoke from the mouth. Since the head was severed, you’ll probably have to use a belt or something to close up the neck hole.
This message brought to you by People For The Ethical Treatment of Corpses.
May 9th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
I feel ill. Seriously. Joe, Kyle. ILL. A belt to close up the neck hole?! Wouldn’t stretching a piece of fabric over the neck hole work better?
May 9th, 2008 at 2:53 pm
It would depend on whether or not the fabric was air permeable. If not, then it would work fine. Perhaps a Tie-died scarf or something with those adorable dancing bears on it?
May 9th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Why not just use something more organic like flesh? As Ed Gein could attest it makes for a fine bit of fabric and rather impermeable as well.
Captcha word was resex
Given the subject(I think old Ed was believed to resex his victims, but hey at least he’s thinking conservation right), makes even me go ewww.
Reuse, recycle, resex, regurgitate.
May 9th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Don’t head shops sell neck-hole plugs?
May 9th, 2008 at 5:25 pm
You have to buy them at the Neck Shop.
(Captcha = stall. I’ll admit I wish I had a better joke here, but I don’t think I’m stalling for more time.)
May 11th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
When does production begin on “Harold and Kumar Go To The Graveyard”? Even Cheech y Chong think that’s f’d up, man!