The Political Whore

By Dan Sullivan
PoHo Contributor

I confess: I’ve been having an affair with Sarah Palin. That’s why she’s stepping down as governor of Alaska.

Don’t get me wrong, this is not the kind of affair that ends a political career. Unlike certain other political affairs of late (Read: Mark Sanford, John Ensign) this affair is not one of the scandalous variety. Quite the contrary. My affair with Alaska’s sweetheart could be just the thing that propels her into the White House in 2012.

See, it isn’t just me who’s having an affair with Sexy Sarah. She’s the darling of many conservative Americans. She stole our hearts from the moment she first stepped onto the national stage back in August as John McCain’s running mate. And now, she’s dissolving her marriage to Alaska to become better acquainted with us — her secret lover — the rest of America.

For me, the affair has lasted long after I met her backstage at a campaign rally shortly before the ‘08 election (see photo above). Of course, I’m not naïve enough to fail to recognize that much of Sarah Palin’s popularity has to do with the fact that she’s an 11 on the hotness scale. If she were an old, fat, white guy, I doubt anyone would care. Read the rest of this entry »

The most dangerous predator on the Appalachian Trail: The Argentinian cougar

By Dan Sullivan
PoHo contributor

I love a good political scandal. There’s just something about the revelation that those we elect to office are regular human beings – susceptible to all the same temptations and lapses in judgment as the rest of us.

Naturally though, I prefer scandals that involve Democrats. The Blago scandal was one-in-a-million. And I think only the Bill Clinton-Monica Lewinsky scandal could top Gary Hart’s 1988 romp on a boat called “Monkey Business.”

It’s not so much fun to read about Republicans breaking their word and compromising their good morals. Especially rising stars such as South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford.

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Bob Smith, right (and we mean far right) back in Congress, back in the day.

By Dan Sullivan
PoHo contributor

Just when you thought the race to replace outgoing Sen. Mel Martinez couldn’t get any more complicated, a man named Bob Smith threw another wrench into the system last week.

Upon hearing about Smith’s entrance into the race, my immediate reaction was, “Who the heck is this Bob Smith? And what does he think he’s doing poking his nose into one of the most pivotal political battles within the Republican Party for the 2010 election season?”

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By Dan Sullivan
PoHo contributor

Dear Attorney General Bill McCollum,

There’s no easy way to tell you this, so I think I’ll just go ahead and say it: I think we should see other people. Don’t get me wrong, you’re a great guy and all, but I’m just not so sure I can handle a serious relationship with you for governor. It’s not you, it’s me. Well, actually, it’s just you.

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