The Political Whore

I searched YouTube for an hour last night looking for something — anything! — worth sharing with the Short List faithful. I finally did a search for “first day of summer” (which is tomorrow, by the way) and found this:

• Israel’s been practicing bombing Iran’s nuclear facilities. How long until practice makes perfect?
• Obama skips public funding, the first major candidate to do so since the system began in 1976.
• Signs point to Florida in the search for the smoking gun in the tainted tomato investigation.
• After really thinking about it, that stuff that looks like ice in the new photos of Mars tuns out to be … ice.
• 3 years old: Over/under on age of Jamie Lynn Spears’ new baby girl when she’s taken into custody by the state.
• I call no way: A Croatian woman who died in 1966 while sitting in a chair watching TV was just found undisturbed after 42 years.
• Screw HD. 3D TV debuts in Japan.
• The Rays sweep the Cubs.

Michelle Obama charms the ladies of The View. Warning: This video is pretty long. If you hate The View, don’t bother.

• Big Oil carves up Iraq.
• The Royal Bank of Scotland yells fire in a crowded global marketplace.
• In retrospect, Tiger Woods winning the U.S. Open was even more spectacular than anyone realized.
• The Washington Post loves the new Firefox browser. I can’t get it to open without it crashing immediately.
• Progress in the war on cancer comes one obscure, cutting-edge technique at a time.
• I’m sure that burger’s tasty, but $200 tasty?
• Your tax dollars at work: The shape-shifting robot.
• Rays beat the Cubs … again.

Universal Studios Hollywood caught fire over the weekend, destroying priceless artifacts of film history …

There goes my dream of owning the sets from Back to the Future.

• Congrats Floridians & Michigonians: You count again.
• Clinton wins Puerto Rico.
• McCain, Phil Gramm and the “Death Bond.”
• Is the U.S. operating “prison ships”? Humm, that does sound like us …
• The Rays continue winning in dramatic fashion.
• Sex sells at the box office.
• Forecasters advise that you disregard forecasters.
• R.I.P. Yves Saint Laurent.

Weezer gets it.

• Americans cut back on driving at historic rate.
• I don’t get it: If that’s an actual picture of NASA’s Phoenix lander on Mars, who or what took it?
• Someone’s shooting rockets at Continental airlines flights over Texas.
• About as grim as it gets.
• Guess who’s got the best record in the majors?
• It’s the thought that counts.
• Quitting smoking: Good. Losing control of the car because of the prescription quit-smoking drug you’re taking: Bad.
• R.I.P. Sydney Pollack.

Colbert buries O’Reilly.

• Edwards hops down off the fence.
• “The Al Gore watch starts now.”
• McCain outlines his four year plan.
• Republican members of congress brace for a November bloodbath.
• The Rays re-up Scott Kazmir’s deal.
• Save the polar bears.
• Syesha comes home … for good.
• I forget what this story is about, but that’s apparently normal.

Dave is so friendly.

• How Barack first found his groove.
• Choosing sides in the battle of the ballpark.
• China’s got a whole lot of shakin’ going on.
• Ron Paul plots a Republican convention revolution.
• A new book pulls hip-hop culture out of the closet.
• On thin ice …
• The Dali look-a-like contest has a winner.
• Speed Racer hits the skids.

Russert called it, so you know it must be over.

• Split decision …
• … but Hillary’s running out of options.
• Breaking down the “Limbaugh Effect.”
• Ron Paul just keeps on runnin’.
• The Unlucky 13: Florida banks living on the edge.
• Bill Gates predicts the future.
• The Rays new stadium: The windup before the pitch.
• Turns out the White House was fond of recycling their e-mail backup tapes.

Barack bounces back …

• … Just in time for The Final Push.
• They shoot horses, don’t they?
• Today’s sign the sky is falling for the Republicans: Cazayoux defeats Jenkins in Louisiana.
• Hear a gun shot, see your neighbor lying on their porch, assume she’s sunbathing?
• We’re #2! We’re #2!
• Iron Man turns to solid gold at the box office.
• Could GTA IV whack the Wii?
• The Sox sweep the Rays.

(Photo of Obama at UNC by Runder.)

Let us all now gawk at the woman Spitzer paid for sex.

• Could Spitzer’s frugality have led to his downfall?
• Hillary plots victory in Pennsylvania.
• In the wake of Adm. William Fallon’s resignation, Cent Com in Tampa cuts 1100 jobs.
• Of all the resignations this week, Geraldine Ferraro’s takes the prize for the most self-righteous.
• Just when you think it can’t get any worse, the mortgage crisis deepens.
• We’re killing the Internet with our love!
• The Rays and Yankees come to blows.
• Yes, they made a sequel to The Lost Boys … and Corey Feldman is in it!

“Ha! That’s good stuff. Send it to Novak.”

• Obama takes the lead! (But only in Iowa.)
• In a sure ratings grabber, CBS News employees vote to “authorize” a strike, possibly denying six 90-year-olds their evening Katie fix.
• OPEC starts talking about dumping the dollar.
• What are women really reading online?
• Sesame Street’s first season comes to DVD … Keep it away from the kids!
• “‘I’m shipping it back. I don’t need a $100 jersey,’ said Rep. Ed Hooper, R-Clearwater, who got a uniform with the new Rays logo on the front and his name and the number ‘08‘ on the back.”
• Our long city-wide nightmare is over: The Miley Cyrus show has come and gone.
• Those St. Petersblog posters are a cantankerous bunch. I kind of want to give them a hug.