the 941

First things first: Somebody’s getting it…

David Beckham, The Musical. Tee hee, they said “Goldenballs.”

Phelps’ pop culture domination begins/continues.

Kellogg’s trumps Wheaties for Phelps promo gold: Ahhh, snap!

Phelps’ backlash begins/continues.

“Fierce, flawless and fabulous” mommas-to-be: Christian Siriano to design for the preggers set. Next up, haute baby messes.

Just in time for the first week back: The economy cuts class.

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Some new, late summer goodness, courtesy of those Conchords. Sunshine and rollerskates. Mmmm hmm…

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Chapter 11 — Tough cookies for Mrs. Fields.

Julia Child, secret agent chef.

30 Seconds sued for 30 million for failing to deliver the “goods.” (Shouldn’t Jordan Catalano and co. get a bonus for NOT making “music”?)

Where were you when Phelps landed his eighth (and his seventh the night prior)?

That means none of us were at the movies, and the numbers prove it.

August anniversary, part 1: E.P.’s death.

August anniversary, part 2: Madge’s birth.

Trump’s latest role: McMahon’s landlord.

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P. Hilton sued for shutting the flip up. Isn’t that a sign of the apocalypse? All of that?

P. Diddy should be sued for not shutting the flip up.

Aw, we heart you, comeback Britz: You can take the country out of the girl, but…

Elvis and Priscilla Barbie dolls. They’re right about the plastic Priscilla thing, just waaaaay early. (Now where’s our matching Graceland Barbie Dreamhouse?)

Uncle Joey finally talks about that song. You oughta know what we’re talking about.

The Chupacabra does exist, and this proves it. Really?

Bigfoot, too, though alive? Not so much.

Another broken record for Phelps, another broken ratings record for NBC.

“John Edwards in a onesie.” Gadzooks.

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This image, taken of a certain sports fan and Olympics attendee, kinda says it all, doncha think?

“ASU! ASU! ASU!”

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Comedian Dane Cook gives a blow-by-blow commentary on the poster for his new movie. Here’s the thing. He’s funny. Kind of.

The latest Olympic scandal: Lip synching kiddies!

This just in[visible]: Super awesome cloak coming soon.

Ben Stiller responds to Tropic Thunder controversy. Yeah, we’re still seeing it, too.

Forbes ranks the top-earning celeb chefs: Rachael Ray prevails, our beloved Bourdain barely placed with a paltry $1.5 million.

In other gourmet news, Tommy Boy Cruise lands his latest role. Speaking of Senor Crazypants™…

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Courtesy of perezhilton.com:

“Desperate much???

In case you didn’t know who was driving the car….

David Hasselhoff was spotted in Malibu on Monday.

Yes, his vehicle has his website scrolled across it!

Lamey McLamester. But, hey, it’s The Hoff.

What else would you expect????”

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Funny: We always think “sleeping on it” is the way to go.

A Martha Stewart parody show = A very good thing.

Heroes star Hayden: She’s just a cheerleader, and her folks are only human. Or something.

The Batman, still on top.

Aw-right, aw-right, aw-right, aw-right. McConaugHAAAY talks fatherhood. And placentas.

Olympics opening ceremony scores ratings gold. Yeah, that was a weak one, we admit. It’s Monday.

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Bernie Mac…

Again, that. is. all.

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Isaac Hayes, dead at 65.

That is all.

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